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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

No friends

28 replies

bluepinkyellowgreen · 28/08/2022 19:10

Anyone else drifted away from their friends? All my friends have other friends and don't bother with me anymore. How can I make new friends as a 28 year old woman ?? I also WFH so don't get out the house much to meet new people /:

OP posts:
WtoB · 28/08/2022 19:11

Im in a similar situation
Sad isnt it

ImJustNotMeAnymore · 28/08/2022 19:13

Me too 👋 I also work for myself from home.

Idrathernotbehere · 28/08/2022 19:25

Same at 41!
I’ve never been great at keeping friends, my kids and partners I always put them first also I’ve

moved around a bit over the last 7-8 years and have drifted away from my old friends.

keeping friends is harder than you think when you’ve left school isn’t it that place where you were all just together has gone and now you have to actually make plans and work at it to see other people.
places like here are great, there’s lots of local community meet ups too, park runs, knitting clubs etc.
Find something you’d like to do and join a club and go!
Don’t be like me tho, don’t not go anywhere and then complain you’ve got no one 😂

TheGuv1982 · 28/08/2022 19:31

I’ve said for sometime that it’s something no one prepares you for as you get older.

I’ve gone from a huge social circle to literally having about 4 friends in the last decade and don’t really see many ways of changing it.

Original poster
bluepinkyellowgreen · 28/08/2022 19:36

I would love just one best friend who actually wants to be my best friend too. The friends in my life now never make plans with me and I'm always the one to reach out. They have other friends who I don't know and chose to spend time with them instead so I am just forgotten about. Or a bad friend maybe

OP posts:
Mary46 · 28/08/2022 19:47

Hi Im good bit older. I joined a walking group its a bit of chat. Not sure what happened past while nobody commits or wants the hassle..... The walking has led to the odd coffee so thats good.

purpleme12 · 28/08/2022 19:54

I don't know.
All the people say they want to meet up then don't follow through.
Some make me concrete plans then most of the time back out.
So in the end I'm left thinking it must be me

BuddhaAtSea · 28/08/2022 19:55

I met this woman at a meetup book club. She had no one. I invited her for coffee. Turns out I work with someone from her home town. I invited them both for a coffee. They hit off and went to a food festival together. On the train back they met someone from our town who was interested in a book club. The three of them invited me for dinner. The four of us started to meet up for walks.
This is how it works in my world. I literally know everyone around here, and if I don’t, I know their best friend.
Try keeping your front door open. It’s not an euphemism.

EmmaH2022 · 28/08/2022 21:39

TheGuv1982 · 28/08/2022 19:31

I’ve said for sometime that it’s something no one prepares you for as you get older.

I’ve gone from a huge social circle to literally having about 4 friends in the last decade and don’t really see many ways of changing it.

This! I didn't have a huge circle but had quite a few friends who helped me through bad times.

they're gone now

but OP you are 20 years younger - join some groups. I'm sure it's not you Flowers

SpinningFloppa · 28/08/2022 22:11

Same here people suggest apps but can’t bring myself to use apps to make friends feels so odd and forced

ohffsomg · 28/08/2022 22:21

Team sport?

Teeheehee1579 · 28/08/2022 22:24

BuddhaAtSea · 28/08/2022 19:55

I met this woman at a meetup book club. She had no one. I invited her for coffee. Turns out I work with someone from her home town. I invited them both for a coffee. They hit off and went to a food festival together. On the train back they met someone from our town who was interested in a book club. The three of them invited me for dinner. The four of us started to meet up for walks.
This is how it works in my world. I literally know everyone around here, and if I don’t, I know their best friend.
Try keeping your front door open. It’s not an euphemism.

You sound like a very nice person!!!

ohffsomg · 28/08/2022 22:37

@BuddhaAtSea need more people like you.

EmmaH2022 · 28/08/2022 23:46

I tried a kind of open door policy, organised group trips.

people took the piss.

Aria999 · 29/08/2022 00:11

@BuddhaAtSea that is a wonderful gift you have. I like and admire people who can do this!

Unicorn55 · 29/08/2022 00:12

I also feel like this and similar age to you. Maybe we should start some sort of thread for lonely mums and match up with each other x

Mary46 · 29/08/2022 09:14

Hi its hard as you older. My walking group was on facebook. 4 us. It didnt add new people but I feel Im getting out.

Jasmine5552 · 29/08/2022 15:32

Mary46 · 28/08/2022 19:47

Hi Im good bit older. I joined a walking group its a bit of chat. Not sure what happened past while nobody commits or wants the hassle..... The walking has led to the odd coffee so thats good.

A walking group sounds a good idea. I think I might join a walking group one of these days as I find it difficult to make friends but I enjoy walking.

Whowhatwherewhenwhynow · 29/08/2022 15:35

bluepinkyellowgreen · 28/08/2022 19:36

I would love just one best friend who actually wants to be my best friend too. The friends in my life now never make plans with me and I'm always the one to reach out. They have other friends who I don't know and chose to spend time with them instead so I am just forgotten about. Or a bad friend maybe

I’m in a similar situations
i have made some new friends through a new hobby and have been determined to make more effort with new people around me to develop the friendship.

it’s hard though isn’t it.
I find getting from acquaintance to friend difficult.

There are always posts like this and I always think there should be regional mumsnet meet ups.

ZippingUp · 29/08/2022 15:45

Same here, but 50 and on my own unexpectedly. WFH etc.

Most of the groups round here seem to be aimed at retirees, so are daytime meets.

Feeling very sad and isolated today.

Mary46 · 29/08/2022 15:56

Zipping its hard. Have one friend retired so she out alot/hard get her free. Then another we drifted once our boys 18+ we just had different interests. I had to mute FB as it was big nights out people out with tons of friends. It wouldnt help your confidence. Yes Jasmine it gets me out then I texted one for coffee another day

ohffsomg · 29/08/2022 18:07

How do you know if someone is also looking for a friend. I don't want to impose myself or come across as desperate.

DavesSpareDeckChair · 29/08/2022 18:33

ohffsomg · 29/08/2022 18:07

How do you know if someone is also looking for a friend. I don't want to impose myself or come across as desperate.

I wish I knew!

Fuzzyhippo · 29/08/2022 18:40

I never had any friends to begin with. If I talk to anyone usually it's ladies over the age of 70. Just can't get on with anyone also in their mid 20s. Never knew why

Aria999 · 29/08/2022 22:25

ohffsomg · 29/08/2022 18:07

How do you know if someone is also looking for a friend. I don't want to impose myself or come across as desperate.

If you click with someone, suggest meeting up, but don't push it, be ok with rejection.