In love with a married man

[specialdelovery]

I'm in love with a married man 😫.

We was seeing each other for a while and it ended because well he is married.

We still have a great connection it's magnetic. We don't communicate via phone but we do talk if we see each other in person.

I know I need to move on from this

Advice on how to move on please, has anyone been in this position?

Go no contact u will get over it. I messed about with a married man on and off. Thought I was in love with him. We never slept together not that it makes any difference. We would only communicate via twitter so my number never on his phone. I was obsessed with him. He felt guilty called it off. Last I heard from him was October Last year said he saw I was going through a bad time, my dad was in hospital. He asked to meet I said I Don't think it's a good idea. Will only stir things up. He said I understand but I'm always here for u. Well my dad passed away and I never heard a word from him. So showed how much he actually cared. Do yourself a favour and cut off all ties. Feelings pass. If he has kids your at least 3rd in his list of priorities.

Of course they rarelyleave as often stay with the wives, as there are gullible DWs who do not care what example they set for their DC. From my point of view, DWs staying with the cheaters, as bad as the OW. They know DH will cheat again. Only DW can make number of cheating husbands go down, by divorcing them, as I did, single women cannot.

Sandra1984
Apparently, makes some DWs feel better.

What's to like about this man....

1. He's cheated on his wife
2. He's lied to you by not telling you about his wife
3. He's seemingly made it clear that if you want to carry on with him knowing he's married, he'd be willing
4. He continues to be dishonest with his wife by not owning up
5. He's been conducting a whole second life and been able to keep it from both you and his wife (for a time).

So have a think about what it is about him that you're attracted to...??!!

How to move on? Remember the lies he told you and imagine the lies he told his wife and all the other ‘magnetic’ connections he’s made with other women whilst married.

You move on, by asking yourself why you so readily bought into his bullshit and working on not repeating those mistakes.

You have the absolute right to ask for advice here but if you weren’t so wrapped up in your ‘magnetic connection’ bubble, you might have been more sensitive to the room you were in.

Yes it's the stupid single women fault not that this married men chase you lie and are great and manipulate women. Some men you don't even know and some just won't give up so they are the ones who are sick know they have a wife and children.
As stupid as the woman is she the single one he is married and she can walk away anytime. He can face his wife each day acting normal and not even remorseful. Because that woman won't be the last.
Men have issues and instead of opening up to their wives they cheat and some feel trapped in marriage they don't want to be in sadly because of children.
I seen a lot of married men on dating sites. You may think why it's because they want fun. Some say it's complicated. Men will lie to get what they want simple not that the OW know this like I said they are great at manipulating you.

Especially if as single woman maybe going through something these men seek out vulnerable women.

It's keep a close eye sometimes on your husband and knowing why he acting up to nip in the bud before he starts checking other women.

OW have a part and so does the wife. But the man has the major part and they could say no I have a wife. Especially if a woman is the doing the chasing.. if they don't they are the weak husband's.

The wife doesn't need to be told you will not get thanks for it. The wife will then decide if she wants to keep the cheating lying scumbag or give him another chance. In a marriage women do have that right to decide to mend what is broken in the marriages. Sometimes when that happens the man changes and he doesn't do it again.
As a wife we also not going to let our marriage getting boring but at the end of the day men will be men. They get bored of the same think eventually. Or temptation and being a man that thinks with his dick just can't help themselves which ever line they spin the wife.

I am talking from OW side as I been there before and a wife now. I still conclude it's the man not all the OW fault. We as the wife or OW need to wake up to ourselves. Be better and men always need to be better but some are never going change and some do. Some realize sadly the OW for them and they don't love their wives sadly and only thing keeping was the children.
With Op situations we don't know what his situation is. We don't know her situation too. Or even what the man's wife is life.
Most men won't leave because they know if they divorce their wife will take them for every penny they have. That's why the man stuck. Yes they always go back because she does forgive brush under carpet wanting to fight for her marriage.
If he does it over and over and is forgiven it's stupid. Then you got to say you don't love me as you continue it.

Then you decide enough is enough after second or third time

I don't like women who are married who just blind and blame the OW.

You seem to be implying that you did not know he was married. If that’s the case, you’ve got bigger problems than the fact he IS married! He lied to you to get sex. Lying about being married is just one further step down the road of “my wife doesn’t understand me” or “we are together for the sake of the kids” or, my personal favourite “we no longer sleep together”. It is always, always bollocks and they spout this shite because if they actually said, yeah I’m happily married and we still have sex, but I just fancy a bit on the side, very few women would say “hop on then!!”.
If he lied about being married, he is a selfish, entitled, lying toad. These are not attractive traits and you should think of this as a lucky escape. In this scenario, I would also be telling the wife.
if you knew he was married, then I’m sorry op but my sympathy is limited. I do not buy the arguments of the “it just happened, I couldn’t help it” brigade. We all have agency, we all make choices and we all know the difference between right and wrong. Funnily enough “it just happened” never makes someone donate all their money to charity, or do anything completely selfless…..it’s ALWAYS selfish!! Either way, you know he is married now. Get yourself into therapy to work out why you don’t feel entitled to be someone’s priority, why you will accept being second best. Put yourself first and block this sad tosser.

Maybe your just in love with the romance of it all. Forbidden fruit secret meet ups. not having him makes you want him more kind of thing. Keep busy in your life fate single men and move on gently he will become a distant memory

You are basically an unpaid prostitute. Congrats.

Hey there,
I totally get how tough this situation must be. Being in love with a married man is like playing with fire—exciting but ultimately dangerous and likely to end in burns. It’s great that you realise you need to move on, and you’re definitely not alone in this. First, cutting off contact is essential. It’s hard, but avoiding places where you might bump into him will help your feelings cool down. Lean on your friends and family for support; they can be a great distraction and offer the emotional support you need. Dive into new interests or hobbies that make you happy and keep you busy. Reflect on what you truly want in a relationship, and remind yourself that you deserve someone who can be fully present and committed to you. Lastly, consider talking to a counsellor. Sometimes, an outside perspective can help you work through your feelings and give you strategies to move forward. Moving on takes time, so be kind to yourself in the process. You’ve got this!

So I get this happens
It's just perhaps me personally

I cannot be attracted to anyone who's married as a that itself is off putting but anyway the women here all up on their high horses have you defending the "relationship " scroll past and focus on the good advice

Move on dear. Get out dating - if he divorces one day, then so be it

Don't be the cause

OP why would you want to be with a proven cheat?

Just date others and keep busy

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