I'm getting so fed up with this. I have dated this guy on and off for 4 years now. In December last year we had a long talk about the fact that we want different things, I laid it all out and told him I need something stable and serious. He isn't ready for it and that's fine, so we ended things and I blocked him on all platforms because it was quite painful. We work in the same building and I can't block him on Teams (although he was muted) so he did occasionally message on there but I ignored them. He showed up at my house a few weeks ago saying he missed me so badly he couldn't help himself and had to get back in touch. We had a date and a night in and ended up sleeping together. Then suddenly he was doing loads of applications for new jobs (he's been talking about needing a new challenge for a long time) and because he has to focus on getting these applications completed by the deadlines, he can't hang out with me. He went back to relying on bumping into one another at work because he enjoys those interactions - talking in front of everyone but having our thing be private. We had a disagreement a couple of weeks ago as these applications are taking priority over me but not over tuesday night football, kung fu lessons and drink with colleagues/friends... I made it clear I feel like I've been used - he said:
"Sadly, it is a coincidence, that this month of all times... that just as we've had an intimate moment... I've become unavailable because of a few applications i need to complete this months... it a pain... and understandable that it sends a very confusing message."
Anyway, this weekend he asked me if I would be free for him to come over yesterday. For context - he's aware that my 7 year old son would be around, who he's only met twice in 4 years - he wouldn't normally suggest coming over when my son is there because I'm so wary of letting people I'm dating meet him. Or at least people who are off and on like this guy. So he suggested 4/5pm. I text him in the morning to say 4.30. Heard nothing at all, all day. At 8pm he text to tell me he'd been unwell.
Is it a waste of time even responding? Or am I being too harsh. I suppose he could be genuinely unwell, although I have no inclination to believe him at this point. Even ill, is it that hard to pick up your phone and text someone that you cant make it? I really want to rant and hand him his arse, I've always responded to these things calmly and rationally... any suggestions?