"I am not that into you"

[JasonK]

Had a wonderful week with a woman and she finally drops this. Fair enough, I can accept that, even if it's unpleasant. But for me was really wonderful. How do you move on? What tricks are there?
Also, she still sends me messages, trying to keep me close and I don't want to shut her off because last week was the best I felt in years, but I am not an "orbiter"

Thank you!

I've never heard of an orbiter but if you're not one then you would surely just cut contact?

Block and move on.

Why would you subject yourself to sticking around?

Have you known her for longer?

After 1 week, unless you have history, I'd suggest you barely know her at all.

If she's not feeling it, move on. You found her, so you'll find others you enjoy spending time with. Good luck!

Just say I'm not interested in staying friends or stop replying. it's the only way, you'll soon forget her.

Were you friends before? If not I'd just stop replying, she's said her piece and you don't want the same things.

You could say 'thanks for being honest with me that you don't want to take things any further. I wish you all the best and had a lovely week with you but would prefer to leave the texting here if the interest isn't mutual'.

If friends previously and you'd like to be again then say similar but just that you'd like a bit of time for things to return to normal.

@SunnySideDeepDown
From 2014. I've met her then, but I was with somebody.
I liked a lot what happened last week, but our date was bizzare.

Long story short:

Long story short: We've met in 2014, nothing, just facebook. Re-met last weekend at a party, went really on with a lot of talking, music, etc. We talked non stop the whole week. We've went Friday on a date. Everything was ok, we went again to the same club where she became the coldest women I've met, like at some point she asked me to stay while she goes ALONE at the bar. I really did not do anything, we chatted and talked. Left and grab a pizza and we ate in the park where she told she thinks she doesn't like me as much as she wants. I've said ok, fair enough. We stayed for another 4 hours, until 6 in the morning. Hugged many times.
Then the next day (actually 5 hours later), I went to grab a coffee and told her I am here, if you want to join fine, if you don't also fine, but if you come, think what it means. She came with a blankie and she asked me to join her in the park where we spent the day, we ordered food, had fun. No kissing, tried it a few times, but somewhat she avoided it, but then she came closer to me like kissing my neck, holding my hand, playing with my hair. Walked her home (I had a meet with friends at 22) and said that I will be free around 1 a.m. Want to meet up again if you are awake? She said let's see and when we arrived at her home, she told me she was feeling sick. Asked her what's wrong, if she wants me to go to a drug store and she said she feels sick our date is ending. And I was wtf.
Then we didn't meet because she didn't want, she ignored me half of day yesterday, called me in the evening, took me out to dinner, told me and then we spent another 4 hours walking and laughing. Then she wrote me she was thinking at me and that she feels like . Asked her if she feels that way because of us and she ignored it, seen my message.
So yeah.

Also auto-invited at my home to cook me something.

She's a mind-fucking attention seeker. She very much enjoys keeping you on her hook. Don't be foolish, block her and move on.

This person isn't the one for you. In the future don't go so full on with long dates that drag on. It's too intense for everyone.

How did you haveva wonderful week with her .. I only reas half of that and her behaviour was totally mixed, contradictory, all over the show.

Thinking that's a wonderful week means you're not paying attention, not seeing red flags etc.

Stop the contact, unless you want a flaky "friend".

She is not interested in you romantically.

I would actually nip this in the bud as I can see her being the type to use you and treat you like a mug when she’s got no better offer.

Dont let her treat you like shit else she’ll never respect you even as a friend.

I personally would block her number as I think if she texted asking to meet up in 10mins you would.

Walk away.
You are an ego boost for her, nothing more.

Urghh, your update? She sounds like a Royal Headfucker.

Tell her straight…
" Hi can you stop messaging me please. You said you’re not that into me and that stung as I liked you. I need some time to move on from that before we can be just friends. I won’t be replying to any further messages from you."

And then block.

She's a high level "cock teaser", she enjoys the attention you give her and that's all.

Run for the hills.

She’s all over the place this is weird teenage melodrama stuff…from memory..
haven’t seen this sort of drama in my teenagers lifes yet but who knows how f this is what passes as courtship, it’s been a long time

I didn't understand because until we met and went to the club, we were good.
Then in the club things started to become really odd.

Yeah, will follow the advice, not gonna block her, but I will ignore her.

You sound about 14.

If someone confuses you, stay away from them. That's the only 'trick' you need.

If you feel you need other 'tricks' after one week, you need to have a serious look about why you're so attached after such a short period, and avoid dating until you've got that sorted out.

You should block her.
Ignore and delete.

That's a bit harsh IMO. He had a crush on the girl, had his hopes and she's giving him mixed signals while bread crumbing him, now the guy is confused (as you would too). It's called a "mind fuck" (excuse my French).

@Sandra1984

the guy is confused (as you would too

No. Not everybody would be confused by this. Adults would see that she was giving mixed signals, and walk away. It's not confusing. If you can get your head around the fact that people do odd stuff, it's much easier not to get confused, and just walk away. Adults understand that not everybody will make sense to them. Children hang around people who don't make sense to them, trying frantically to work them out, and gain their approval.

I agree, but the "relationships" part of the MN forum is full of grown up women opening threads with a very similar theme ("I'm dating a man who is giving me mixed signals"). Most of us have "been there done that". It's human nature.

Massive red flags here. From you.

1. You kept trying to kiss her despite her not saying yes the first time. "Somehow she avoided it."
2. A grown man saying "blankie"
3. All these weird hours and so much neediness after so little time.

Exhausted just reading.

*She's a high level "cock teaser"

Made me chuckle and true

Another poster mentioned it but you may want to refrain from using the term blankie in future. that would be an instant kiss of death to any budding sexual attraction.

Stop trying to kiss women who aren't enthusiastic about you kissing them.

Also, equally, don't keep hanging around women who happily ignore you while in their company.

Move on. And blankie is something a child says. Don't do it.

She probably had her eye on someone else at the club so didn’t want to look too cosy with you. She’s a head fuck, block and don’t look back.

I am not an "orbiter"

This is such PUA language, at best, by the way. She's not sounding great, but I'd run a mile from you as well if you're using those "tricks".