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How important is someone's voice and accent when it comes to attraction?

117 replies

JuicyMelonss · 07/07/2022 10:57

Could or have you been attracted to someone despite not liking their accent or voice initially?
Have you fallen for someone purely by ears?

A man's voice and accent is a deal breaker to me so I'm curious to see if other women share my view.

OP posts:
19Bears · 08/07/2022 12:36

I would start up a new dating app where you have to include a voice note and video of how you walk 😅Accents and tone of voice are vital in fancying someone. My stbexh irritates the life out of me with his accent, the stupid upwards inflection, the unmanliness of his voice in general. And with him being from the south and me from the north east, he can't understand a word I'm saying anyway. I didn't see who posted about Jordan Henderson, but I am Jordan Henderson!!!! There's someone I know who has a beautiful sexy geordie accent and manly tone, and is equally lovely to look at...... It makes all the difference

layladomino · 08/07/2022 12:56

Anyone using Vocal Fry. It's really irritating, false and distracting (not in a good way).

I read up a bit on it and it seems that most people respond negatively to it, and it makes people less hire-able, and yet it's becoming more and more common.

kewgirl · 08/07/2022 13:00

To me not the accent alight I could not have a relationship with someone who did not speak clear English
Could also never be with a guy who talks ghetto - all that - HEY and Wassup - Bro - Sis - innit etc
A guy who has a good command of English and wide vocabulary and reads a lot is vital to me
As well as a rugby player body LOL
Is why I was attracted to my partner

PedantScorner · 08/07/2022 13:39

How ironic.

Siameasy · 08/07/2022 15:11

@Siameasy You naughty minx! Haha I'd probably do the same because curiosity! What made his voice sexy? What was it about it? I think I read on MN a post where they knew they'd marry this person purely from hearing their voice on the phone. Insane what the right voice and accent can do to us, isn't it?

Friendly, assertive, confident, smooth, deep voice and he used my name a lot.
It was a busy time of year and he was very accommodating about getting an appointment. He said something like I’ll slide it in don’t worry and I was pmsl internally and meekly said “oh yes do”😂

LadyEloise1 · 08/07/2022 15:27

There was an ad on Irish tv some years back. I can't remember what it was for - so not a very good ad- it showed this really handsome guy. And then he opened his mouth and spoke. Horrendous Smile
Basically don't judge a book by its cover. 😂

TreePoser · 08/07/2022 17:19

Oh i remember that ad! It made me die laughing!!! I also cannot remember what it was advertising

mamaduckbone · 08/07/2022 20:55

There are some voices that I just wouldn't be able to tolerate. Dh doesn't have an especially distinctive voice so it wasn't a factor with him, although obviously his voice doesn't annoy me.
When I was younger I had a big thing for northern accents...I had a boyfriend from Cumbria at Uni and his voice definitely played a part in me fancying him.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 08/07/2022 20:58

I met someone who I spoke to on the phone a few times before I saw them. Fabulous voice, involved in hospital radio etc. Very handsome as it happened too. Reader I married him. He turned out to be an arsehole. 20 yrs later I divorced him. Current DH has normal voice. It matters not.

CthulhuInDisguise · 08/07/2022 21:11

I don't like high pitched voices, they grate on me. My boyfriend had elocution lessons in his 20s to lose his broad Lancashire accent, he sounds quite posh but when he's drunk or excited, the Northernness returns! He also calls me "chuck" but says it in his posh voice. It makes me smile.

RazorToast · 08/07/2022 22:25

Totally agree and would also add Geordie to the list.

springsally · 09/07/2022 07:59

It's huge for me too and this thread is so interesting. I love an accent generally, especially Scottish, N.I. American or German. Also a fan of Brummie and Welsh.

On the other hand, I refused a date because of a South African accent, I just can't listen to it for extended periods. Also dislike high voices, and very posh like Jacob Rees Mogg.

I can find an average man very attractive if they have a nice voice.

LadyEloise1 · 09/07/2022 08:44

@TreePoser
I just googled the ad on Joe.ie - 14 Irish ads that are embedded in Irish culture.
The ad is for Esat Digifone---- - the guy from the bar.
Worth a google or a link - sorry I can't do links Blush
The voice and accent are as dreadful as I remember. The byline was - Should have sent a text. After hearing the voice.

Jewel7 · 09/07/2022 10:13

Hmmm interesting post. I would be put off by someone being really loud, even in general conversation. I quite like an Irish accent. But I have met people with strong Scottish accents that I really struggled to understand. Not proud of that! My husband has quite a calm voice that I like. But an ex had a really deep gruff voice which was a massive plus even when just chatting randomly on the phone!

LadyEloise1 · 09/07/2022 14:17

@Jewel7
There are so many different Irish accents.
As different as Liverpudlian and Cockney.
Which one do you like ?

Spanielsarepainless · 09/07/2022 17:19

I agree. My DH has a lovely regional accent. It's not my favourite - southern Irish, Scottish except Glaswegian, Lancashire including some of the softer Liverpudlian, but not Manchester, most of Wales, Norfolk and Suffolk, North and East Yorkshire and all points north. Posh is fine for me. Never ever Birmingham area or the mangled crap emerging from London these days.

TreePoser · 09/07/2022 20:26
TreePoser · 09/07/2022 20:26

@LadyEloise1 that was to ladyEloise1

LadyEloise1 · 09/07/2022 20:28

Thank you @TreePoser
Hope others will enjoy it too.

Abhannmor · 09/07/2022 21:19

TreePoser · 09/07/2022 20:26

It's the pitch as much as the accent! Which I can't quite place . Cork / Kerry ?

JuicyMelonss · 09/07/2022 22:35

@LadyEloise1 Love the Bridgerton (I’m guessing?) nickname! You can’t have been disappointed when you saw his face then that you dated 😊 I’m not too familiar with Irish accents but the ones I heard were very soft on the R’s which I like on a woman’s voice but not so much on a man’s.

@TitInATrance funny you mention the speed of speech that’s definitely an element to the intrigue or irritation! I LOLed at your ‘we knew what the manager looked like but new people couldn’t wait to meet him’. That’s what I mean about the look not matching the voice and the awkwardness or disappointment this can create 😊 When you said callous and dismissive pitch and tone it made me think of Jacob Rees Mogg. Awfully posh and sharp as a tack but sounds very..dry if that makes sense.

@Youcunnyfunt I see what you’ve done there with the name! LOL Deep and slightly gravelly sounds lovely! I agree with you on voice can make or break attraction for me even when the guy is quite obviously handsome if his voice isn’t my cup of tea I just couldn’t be sexually interested. I think I know what you mean about just the right amount of poshness in the voice and pronunciation before it becomes too distracting. Yes! The balloon popping imagery is perfect that’s exactly how it feels like when you’re shocked and disappointed at a gorgeous man’s voice…just completely unexpected. That’s how I felt about my Twitter crush I mentioned above. Isn’t funny how Mr Sexy wasn’t conventionally sexy in the flesh. I heard a saying that the hottest sounded phone sex workers were often not very typically attractive and the ones with rougher or average voices were stereotypically better looking. Haha about with the lights off you cheeky minx! A hot voice can definitely leave an impression.

@tellmewhentheLangshiplandscoz it’s alright I’m enjoying this actually and appreciate all the replies 😊

@NeedToKnow101 Yes others were of your view, too. To me it’s both accents and voices. You’re much more openminded and tolerant 😊

@Kanojo I have met people that sounded to my ears muffled or unclear and in the end I had to answer with vague words because it got ridiculous how much I asked them to repeat themselves. I think my hearing is fine but some voices or tones are trickier for me to make out.

@Hopingforabagofbuttons We like opposite accents with the exception of Brum. There is someone for everyone as they say! So relieved loads of you say it’s important in attraction.

@CousinKrispy Oh really? What was it about your DP’s voice and accent that you didn’t like? What made you persevere with him? Do you still notice his voice and accent or have you grown to like them?

@Elvira2000 Several posters said the same thing as you: you don’t notice them after a while. I don’t think I’ve ever given anyone a (romantic) chance if I wasn’t initially attracted to their voice and accent but in a social or professional context yes I have adapted to their tone though every now and then it might jar on me particularly if I’m having a bad day. Of course I’m polite to them though as I’m sure some might not like my voice or accent either!

@mewkins Someone else was of this opinion, too. I think I like a bit of posh and some regional accents in equal measures.

@19Bears OMG I can’t stand upwards inflection? Everything sounds like this? It’s so tiresome? Hahaha sorry I couldn’t resist! Did you mean to type you are Jordan Henderson? I had to go on YouTube to listen to his voice and yeah it sounds very manly but not my favourite accent. I can see he’d be attractive to many though!

@layladomino Vocal fry like Kim Kardashian? I hear some posh Made in Chelsea women talking in what I assume is vocal fry. It’s like a creaking door closing very slowly. I can tolerate a sentence or two here and there that ends up unintentionally croaky ended but not every single sentence. Our voices and accents definitely affect how people see us professionally.

@kewgirl Your partner sounds like a catch! Reads, speaks proper English and a rugby player body! Lucky you! 😉

@PedantScorner hahaha I think I know what you’re referring to but come on cut us some slack 😊 I love your name – very clever.

@Siameasy They do say that if you use the name of the person you’re talking to in a conversation with them it makes them more attracted to you. It’s like a seduction or charming technique. It can also be used to make sure others are really paying attention. I think you can hear the confidence in someone’s voice. Gosh I’m blushing at the ‘slide it in’ and ‘oh yes do’ comments hahaha!! Sometimes our bodies have a mind of their own and our brains just turn into mush. Sexual innuendos with a beautiful voice and sexy accent are like catnip to me!

@LadyEloise1 and @TreePoser Thank you for coming back with the advert!! It was like a punch in the gut when I heard his voice LOL He was so gorgeous, too! What a cruel world!!

@mamaduckbone I like Northern accents (in general), too. It definitely makes dull conversations more interesting if their voice and accent are a joy to listen to, does it not?

@SpongeBobJudgeyPants Haha I like the name! Do you think your ex put you off men with nice voices or was it coincidental that your current DH has a normal voice rather than a fancy radio voice?

@CthulhuInDisguise chuck in a posh accent! Haha 😊 Definitely familiar with accent change once drunk or excited. It takes a lot of concentration and deliberation to control your pronunciation. Were his elocution lessons many years ago then? I would have though there is far more tolerance to regional accents in professional roles these days?

@RazorToast Is Geordie an accent you like or dislike?

@springsally Jacob Rees Mogg sounds posher than the queen! Very unique voice and tone. Sort of reminds me of the guy that presents Grand Design (the voice I mean). I agree with you in that an attractive voice elevates an average man to a hot man.

@Jewel7 Loooove a gruff voice but ultimately if a guy is loud you can end up with headaches and everything sounding like a fight. I was with a guy who would get louder and louder and redder and redder as he got more passionate about something and strangers used to look at me horrified as if it to say: Are you OK? Do you need us to call someone? LOL So yes, a calm voice is so appreciated particularly after a hard day.

@Spanielsarepainless LOL at “mangled crap emerging from London these days” A bit harsh but OK I’m from London and I know exactly what you mean. It’s
a real melting pot.

OP posts:
katesbushh · 09/07/2022 23:07

My OH honestly sounds like Jamie Oliver.
I recoiled in horror when I first heard him speak

Spotted him from across a crowded bar 18 years ago.

I have a strong West Midlands accent.

But now I love his.
He's still not so sure of mine haha

Ohahjustalittlebit · 09/07/2022 23:08

The guy from the bar ad is a legendary ad here in Ireland! We still quote it.

For me accent and voice is important. Im from Dublin but gate a thick (howya) Dub accent. My other half is from NI and his accent is to die for. He also has a very nice voice too. Manly. Sexy.

Ohahjustalittlebit · 09/07/2022 23:09

Gate? Hate.

RazorToast · 09/07/2022 23:13

Geordie is one that I like along with Birmingham and Liverpool.