Married men on Tinder

[notthetinderswindler]

I've been single for a while and signed up to various dating apps, not really relevant but just to give a bit of background.

Scrolling through Tinder and I came across the profile of a man I know who is married to a woman I am acquainted with and see occasionally. They have children and have been together a long time.

So my question is, do I somehow let her know that her husband on there presumably with the intention of being unfaithful? Having been lied to in the past many, many times by my ex, if I was in her situation I'd want to know. Or do I pretend I've never seen it and stay quiet?

My opinion of the man in question is probably clouding my judgment - he's generally a very dishonest person in business (fraud, tax evasion, etc.), manipulative and a liar. I do not like him.

I'm not sure if his wife stays with him because he provides them with a nice lifestyle but only manages to do so because of his shady behaviour. She might already know what he's like and turn a blind eye?

WWYD?

I found out recently my boyfriend is on Tinder. We met that way and he never deleted his account. I posted only today about it. Send her screenshots and let her make her own mind up. I would want to know for sure.

Tell the wife

I saw a school mum’s husband on Tinder. Didn’t say anything the first time. A few weeks later, I saw him pop up again. I bumped into her at a class one day and asked if I could speak to her, preambled that if it wasn’t my business to just say, etc. She thanked me and said she had been seeking proof/support and was glad she now had it. It enabled her to call time and initiate divorce.

I am aware of an acquaintance whose photo was ‘stolen’ and used on someone else’s profile. Sounds like an excuse but it was reported in the local paper; he had got on to Tinder about it, reported it for impersonating/fake profile, and got confirmed that it wasn’t him. I know it sounds far-fetched but it is possible.

In the case of the school dad above, it was his actual name, age, and photos from his hobby so definitely him.

Send her screenshots & say you just wanted her to know. What she does with it is up to her & you'll never mention it to her again, or anyone else.

MIL (who couldn't keep secrets) told me SIL discovered BIL on Tinder after he left her for a more fun life. SIL's single minded about money, status etc. & was determined to drag his high earning butt back (we weren't/ aren't allowed to tell anyone they split - for a year!) As much as I dislike her, at least she knew the score up front & won't hear about it years down the track.

I'd tell her, everyone has a right to their personal agency and the truth of their lives. Cheating puts the betrayed at risk in so many ways.

@user1471462428 I've heard so many similar stories. I'm so so sorry about your friend.