Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DP Draft email to tigerkat6969

81 replies

InSearchOfSmth87 · 23/06/2022 21:49

Found an empty draft email to the above email address in husbands phone. Should I be worried?
This can’t be a work colleagues or a friends email...? no other history found.
And no I can’t ask him about It because he just lies because is a porn and sex addict with a history of tendency to message women/sex workers.. But I was hoping he has put it behind him.
Am I overreacting?

OP posts:
SquirrelFan · 15/08/2022 18:34

Why is your self - esteem nonexistent? He's the cheater, the liar, the greasy grubby jerk. You have done nothing to be ashamed of.

LooseGoose22 · 15/08/2022 20:25

Punters are punters, brothe crawlers are brothel crawlers (adult work being the modem brothel), in the spirit of Taylor Swift "an the punters gonna punt, punt, punt, punt, punt".

They do it with every woman they're with. They do it habitually.

It's not about you.

It's not about any java on your part. Noone can provide what a punter wants..
Because he wants sex with multiple people and sex with prostitutes. In your hs case, he'll happily take it with non prostitutes as well. Hrs even taken the variety and excitement and fix he wants from men.

So he's a habitual cheater.

He's a prostitute user.

He's gay or bi or a msm.(men who have sex with men); a man in any of those categories having a relationship with a woman who does not know he has sex with men ... is a fucking scumbag beyond scumbag.

He's just generally a fucked up scumbag.

He's a degenerate.

I wouldn't even like to begin to try to unpack what psychological issues he has - to seek sex to such an extent, outside his relationship, with prostitutes and even with men.

His issues may never be solved and you are the last person who should he expected to support him; the victim of so much infidelity, so mu h deceit, so much disrespect, so much danger to your health.

LooseGoose22 · 15/08/2022 20:31

*It's not about any lack on your part

He shouldn't be following you anywhere.

Your marriage, the farce that he made of it, should not continue.

What he had done is not something anyone should have to.cone to terms with/accept/tolerate. Not for anything. Not for kids.

You matter too, your health matters, you need to.be as physically and mentally healthy as possible to raise your kids... and this "man" damages you mentally, and has great capacity to damage your physical health too.

None of this is your fault or your responsibility ...... he is what he is. And what he is is a damaged , fucked up despicable degenerate.. no matter hpe he looks on the surface.

lastminutedotcom22 · 15/08/2022 23:58

InSearchOfSmth87 · 23/06/2022 22:14

I am out of ideas but have a bad feeling, it’s been going on for 6,5 years and now we have an additional 1 year old to our 6.5 year old. Plus if we break up I would have to move back to my home country which is fine but kids will be missing their dad.
I have left him twice already, due to sexting and contacting escorts. But he just won’t stop I am afraid and I am most afraid that he will sooner or later meet up with them (which has been just a fantasy so far). I am so at loss

Sorry to say this but if he has form does doing this why on earth did you have yet another child with him? That's ridiculous

Isausernameavailable · 16/08/2022 00:12

Why do you look at his phone? Trust him, or get rid of him, it has to be one or the other

layladomino · 16/08/2022 08:36

What a vile, vile man. It's him who should have self esteem issues, not you.

I'm pleased you're going back to your home country, if that will help you get some support and to settle somewhere where you have family / friends. Whatever you do - please leave this dispicable man.

He cheats (repeatedly, and shows no signs of ever stopping), he lies (and has for many years, and shows no sign of stopping), he puts your health at risk, he doesn't care a jot for you or your feelings. He shows he doesn't have any respect for you.

You deserve so much better. He won't change. Please don't waste your life with this man. You have plenty of time now to get away from him and build a happy life with your children. You will also be free to maybe meet someone else later on, and have a happy, healthy, respectful and loving relationship. You won't ever have that with this man.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page