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Original poster

Would this be a red flag?

102 replies

Scienceseeker · 05/05/2022 21:05

If you were talking to someone new and received this message before your first date, would you see it as a red flag or just a guy who doesn’t know what he’s doing?

”I think if I'm being honest, there might not be attraction between us initially at first sight, but it will probably come with getting to know you better and finding out that you really are a special person and not like the barbie dolls out there who only care about their Instagram“.

Thoughts welcome 🤔

OP posts:
DivorcedAndDelighted · 05/05/2022 21:27

Fuck sake, who does he think he is? No bloody way!

StopStartStop · 05/05/2022 21:28

Bye, mister.

CherrySocks · 05/05/2022 21:30

Very peculiar

DatingDinosaur · 05/05/2022 21:34

Well if I’d received that message I’d be getting that Red Flag feeling.

Actually, no.

I’d be getting that ick feeling.

Same difference really.

ProudThrilledHappy · 05/05/2022 21:36

I probably wont fancy you because you don’t look like fake, filtered women on instagram but if you’ll tolerate me dragging it out with minimal commitment over a long period of time, there might be something better to come

Pixiedust1234 · 05/05/2022 21:39

Who the hell says things like that? Nobody good.

Ditch him. Say you might have been attracted to him at first sight but now you have got to know him better you realise he's a special person (ie twat).

cherrypiepie · 05/05/2022 21:39

He's a dick. He is saying he doesn't fancy you but might be worth a shot. And, even if you thought that you wouldn't say it -so yes negging too

Original poster
Scienceseeker · 05/05/2022 21:39

I know it sounds stupid but I honestly feel like crying it’s made me feel not good enough which is obviously how he sees me.

I’ve since had one that says it’s okay because he’s such I can ‘win him over’ with my personality. Hmm

OP posts:
DontPickTheFlowers · 05/05/2022 21:45

Odd and actually very rude and I insensitive. He doesn’t think he’ll be attracted to you because you’re not like Insta girls?

What if you aren’t attracted to him 🤷🏻‍♀️

He sounds like an arrogant twat

MsFrog · 05/05/2022 21:48

Scienceseeker · 05/05/2022 21:39

I know it sounds stupid but I honestly feel like crying it’s made me feel not good enough which is obviously how he sees me.

I’ve since had one that says it’s okay because he’s such I can ‘win him over’ with my personality. Hmm

Oh my god, that's vile.

You should just send him a link to this thread and then block him. What a dick.

AmbushedByCake1 · 05/05/2022 21:49

He's trying to neg you. I wouldn't hit out with him.

Stichintime · 05/05/2022 21:51

Yuck

Fireflygal · 05/05/2022 21:55

That is horrible.

Please don't let a stranger (who I bet has been rejected by many women) impact your self esteem.

Fireflygal · 05/05/2022 21:56

On reflection, I suspect he thinks YOU are out of his league.

OrlandointheWilderness · 05/05/2022 21:58

I'd be sending back 'oh I'm so glad you said that, tbh I was so concerned as you are nothing like the men I find attractive but I think I could get over my repulsion enough if you win me over with your personality.... oh wait. That's fucking ugly too.'

But I'm very stressed with essays to get in soon and running on caffeine!

pictish · 05/05/2022 21:58

Is he for real? Wtf?
Please send a pithy response before blocking.

jesusmaryjosephandtheweedonkey · 05/05/2022 22:03

This is basically saying " you will be grateful that I went out with you"
Block him

DatingDinosaur · 05/05/2022 22:04

Scienceseeker · 05/05/2022 21:39

I know it sounds stupid but I honestly feel like crying it’s made me feel not good enough which is obviously how he sees me.

I’ve since had one that says it’s okay because he’s such I can ‘win him over’ with my personality. Hmm

But he doesn't know you. You've not met. He probably thinks he sound cool and laid back or some such other shite when what he really sounds like is a pillock who most probably trots out this same line to every female he matches with. Don't forget, its YOU vetting HIM for suitability ... and he's failed miserably. So well done for spotting that bullet early enough to dodge it.

Please don't let some crappy pick up artist's neggy comment upset you.

JudyGemstone · 05/05/2022 22:06

Bye Felipe

Chinuplippyon · 05/05/2022 22:07

Please block him with no explanation and understand this is nothing to do with you! Weirdo! So he puts your looks down and yet insults the women who he does think of as his type. Sounds like some weird incel who hates women.

CanofCant · 05/05/2022 22:09

Misogynist. Do not pass go.

Trivester · 05/05/2022 22:10

I’m sorry he’s made you feel bad. All the more reason to block him. Good relationships do not feel like that.

And we’ll done for spotting him - guys like him prey on vulnerability and low self esteem. Lots of us here have a couple of decades of experience and can spot the creeps straight away but gaining that experience can be painful. Keep using the mn collective if you’re not sure.

MiniTheMinx · 05/05/2022 22:12

What is he saying.....he thinks Barbie girls are attractive but not nice people, you are not attractive because you aren't a Barbie and if you prove to be a nice person he might give you a pitty shag.......

FIZZYTEDDY · 05/05/2022 22:15

I literally cannot believe anyone would send this message. What did you send back??

PonyPatter44 · 05/05/2022 22:15

I'm a bit weird, but I would be tempted to go on this one date just to add another WTF story to my collection. However, if you are upset rather than angered by his message, then I wouldn't go.