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Original poster

Attached man paying me lots of attention

68 replies

LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:17

An attached man doing some work for me is paying me a lot of attention.

He says his relationship (a long with 2 kids, a teen and almost teen) is rocky but he won't leave because his partner has had a very significant health issue and he won;t go in case it were eve to recur ... and also because his kids have been devastated any time they've looked like they were going to split.

He claims his partner has told him to find someone else and move on.

But he won't because of the above.

When I suggested if his behaviour (attention to me, flirtation etc) is not normal for me, then maybe it means his relationship is truly screwed and he should leave and coparent his kids to the best of his abilty ... he became quite indignant, upset and said he felt his loyalty was being questioned and it was unfair.

What on earth ...?

OP posts:
Original poster
LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:18

(Sorry, not normal for him)

OP posts:
GreyCarpet · 12/04/2022 16:23

You weren't supposed to be practical.

You were supposed to be flattered by his attention, admire his commitment to his family and flirt back with him.

I hope you're not flirting back with him. The man's a sleaze.

Stroppypants · 12/04/2022 16:23

In my experience the only reason men talk this way is because they’re testing the water to see if you’d be interested in a no strings fling.

theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity · 12/04/2022 16:23

Tell him to fuck off. Biggest pile of wank going . Dog ate my homework is more believable

RBKB · 12/04/2022 16:26

You know what to do. Sounds like you are getting sucked into it all...good luck if you are. It never ends well. His relationship is none of your business...he may not have the class to remember that...but you should.

Onthedunes · 12/04/2022 16:26

Why are you even speaking to this man about his marriage.

It is between him and his wife, if he is flirting and chatting you up, then stop it, you have the information and know he isn't available so why keep listening to him.

Find someone else to do the work, I hope you're not paying him by the hour to listen to him drone on about his marriage woes, whilst he tries to get a free shag out of it aswell.

LampLighter414 · 12/04/2022 16:27

He wanted a casual shag on the side and he's annoyed you didn't go for the bait

layladomino · 12/04/2022 16:29

Yeah he's after a casual fling and is testing the water. Total sleaze (and don't rule out he's doing it with several women at once).

Original poster
LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:29

@theyhavenothingbuttheaudacity

Tell him to fuck off. Biggest pile of wank going . Dog ate my homework is more believable
Also says he does most of the housework because she doesn't want to damage her nails.

And that she's regularly sharp or angry with him for no apparent reason.

OP posts:
TortugaRumCakeQueen · 12/04/2022 16:30

When I suggested if his behaviour (attention to me, flirtation etc) is not normal for me, then maybe it means his relationship is truly screwed and he should leave and coparent his kids to the best of his abilty ... he became quite indignant, upset and said he felt his loyalty was being questioned and it was unfair

Who on earth is having in depth conversations like this with a handyman? Shock

Original poster
LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:31

@Onthedunes

Why are you even speaking to this man about his marriage.

It is between him and his wife, if he is flirting and chatting you up, then stop it, you have the information and know he isn't available so why keep listening to him.

Find someone else to do the work, I hope you're not paying him by the hour to listen to him drone on about his marriage woes, whilst he tries to get a free shag out of it aswell.

He's not married ... but I suppose that's immaterial.

Anyway, I'm way too polite and find it almost impossible to ignore messages, so I jus said .. that sounds hard and then the above ... maybe you should split etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:34

@TortugaRumCakeQueen

When I suggested if his behaviour (attention to me, flirtation etc) is not normal for me, then maybe it means his relationship is truly screwed and he should leave and coparent his kids to the best of his abilty ... he became quite indignant, upset and said he felt his loyalty was being questioned and it was unfair

Who on earth is having in depth conversations like this with a handyman? Shock

Not quite a handy man, and I have conversations with pretty much everyone about whatever crops up.

The other day I had one with a lady working in am animal charity shop who started talking about my dc and ended up telling me she's broody but can;t have more kids because her hubby had a vasectomy behind her back ..... this is par for the course for me, for some reason. People tell me their life stories.

OP posts:
ItsPrettyObvious · 12/04/2022 16:36

Tale as old as time

Original poster
LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:37

@Onthedunes

Why are you even speaking to this man about his marriage.

It is between him and his wife, if he is flirting and chatting you up, then stop it, you have the information and know he isn't available so why keep listening to him.

Find someone else to do the work, I hope you're not paying him by the hour to listen to him drone on about his marriage woes, whilst he tries to get a free shag out of it aswell.

Mid job, and I've waited a year to get him.

They can pick and choose their work.

He's not paid by the hour.

OP posts:
Loopytiles · 12/04/2022 16:39

You’re paying him for work?

Stop listening to this bullshit and stop messaging!

AnyFucker · 12/04/2022 16:41

Pitiful

JamieNorthlife · 12/04/2022 16:44

is rocky but he won't leave because his partner has had a very significant health issue

OP, there is no way you don't know this is a typical chat-up line/ lie

When he says his relationship is rocky, you should answer ... well maybe you should go for couples therapy or work harder to improve it.

Aquamarine1029 · 12/04/2022 16:45

FGS stop being such a mug.

Original poster
LemonDrop22 · 12/04/2022 16:46

Yeah think I'll mention therapy if he raises it again, and if necessary reiterate it.

OP posts:
D0lphine · 12/04/2022 16:47

He is trying to cheat on his I'll partner.

What a catch.

For fuck sake block and ignore.

Mumoblue · 12/04/2022 16:48

Ah, yes, the old “my wife is a harridan, the marriage is dead, woe is me, if only someone would stroke my ego and/or penis!”

It’s so cliche it’s funny.
Tell him to back off. Just repeat that you’re not the person to be talking to about his marriage problems.

D0lphine · 12/04/2022 16:49

@LemonDrop22

Yeah think I'll mention therapy if he raises it again, and if necessary reiterate it.
Err no just ignore him! Why the fuck would you want someone like this in your life???
Thestagshead · 12/04/2022 16:50

Op he just wants a shag and is making it clear he is taken and he’s not leaving her, so it’s just a shag. If you want to shag some sleaze go for it, but that’s all this dude is looking for. He Loves his partner and wants to stay, but he can’t tell you thay and that he just wants an easy lay.

Aquamarine1029 · 12/04/2022 16:53

@LemonDrop22

Yeah think I'll mention therapy if he raises it again, and if necessary reiterate it.
Why on earth would you continue to communicate with this loser?
lemongreentea · 12/04/2022 16:55

Are you lonely OP and enjoying the attention?

This guy is a sleaze and is trying it on for a quickie shag from you. In effect YOU would be paying him for the sex if its during the hours you are paying him. Bet he does this with a lot of the women he does work for.

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