Page 4 | DH's beard gives me the ick - WWYD?

NotABeardFan · 2022-04-10T17:22:30+00:00

Over the last few months DH has grown a beard. I mentioned at the beginning it's not really my thing but I really can't stand it. It's not just the look, it's the feel. I don't want to kiss him any more which is obviously not good for our sex life. I don't know how I can bring it up without hurting his feelings or even if I should, after all, it is his face! Wwyd?

MistyRock · 11/02/2023 08:24

I'll retract the last line as its a bit harsh. But seriously 99% of men look far better without the beard. You've got to be extremely attractive and keep it nice to carry it off. Like Jason Momoa. He looks lovely with his beard, but he's got a, good look. It wouldn't look quite as good as Terry down the road wearing his Asda jeans.

emptythelitterbox · 11/02/2023 08:33

Beards are so aging, especially when they start to grey.

Also can't deal with the beard hair in my mouth or up my nose when trying to kiss and the big bushy ones make it impossible for me to lip read.

guys go around thinking they look like jake Gyllenhaal or jason momoa but the reality is they're looking like papa smurf.

ElizaGumpyLeg · 11/02/2023 08:57

@MistyRock

What a weird thing to say. So many men have beards, it’s totally normal. It’s what happens unless they shave. It’s not “unusual” or some rare thing in the slightest

MistyRock · 11/02/2023 09:28

I'm not sure why it's so weird. Beards are gross. I'm not talking about a week without shaving. I'm talking about ugly long straggly beards. It's especially gross when the mustache but goes over the lips. Just gross. Its so unkempt looking.

Menopants · 11/02/2023 09:31

gamerchick · 10/04/2022 19:11

I told husband if he grew a beard then I would grow mine.

That was that.

This! The perfect answer

HappydaysArehere · 11/02/2023 09:47

I can sooo sympathise. My dh had a moustache years ago and I hated it. After a time he shaved it off after a few uncomplimentary remarks made by me. I would have to state how I feel. What about adding “unhygienic” into the equation.

Witsendwilly · 11/02/2023 10:41

HappydaysArehere · 11/02/2023 09:47

I can sooo sympathise. My dh had a moustache years ago and I hated it. After a time he shaved it off after a few uncomplimentary remarks made by me. I would have to state how I feel. What about adding “unhygienic” into the equation.

Unhygienic? Wtf?

C8H10N4O2 · 11/02/2023 10:47

NotABeardFan · 10/04/2022 19:27

I'm not going to tell DH anything about him gives me the ick because I love him and that would hurt him.

I'll try the humorous but straight approach, thanks all.

Have you tried telling him that having flashbacks to old uncles when he kisses you is a bit of a passion killer?

Its up to him what he does beardwise but its also up to you what you are willing to do with it in place.

PurpleButterflyWings · 11/02/2023 11:02

@MistyRock

I'll retract the last line as its a bit harsh. But seriously 99% of men look far better without the beard. You've got to be extremely attractive and keep it nice to carry it off. Like Jason Momoa. He looks lovely with his beard, but he's got a, good look. It wouldn't look quite as good as Terry down the road wearing his Asda jeans.

What an incredibly silly and inaccurate comment. '99% of men look better without beards?!' Absolutely rubbish. Loads of men look good with beards, whether it's goatees or longer beards. And they look good without them too. To say 99% of men look better without a beard is just rubbish. Indeed, some men look better WITH a beard than without.

I'm not fond of beards myself, and I didn't like kissing my husband when he had one. I also found it quite repugnant at the thought of food in there, as whether men like it/admit it or not, food DOES get caught in beards. 😲I also agree with a pp that beards are ageing. My DH looked 10-12 years older when he had a beard.

I also think it's women, mostly 40-45 plus, who don't like beards. Every single woman I've ever spoke to, or known of, under the age of 36-37, is quite happy for their man to have a beard. Like most men I know under 37, are happy for their woman to have tattoos. Most men I know/know of who are middle aged or older, find tattoos on women quite repugnant and off-putting.

It's definitely an age thing. Tattoos on women are disliked by way more middle aged and older men than younger men, and beards on men are disliked by way more middle aged and older women than younger women..

LittlemissMama67 · 11/02/2023 11:04

Urgh, my partner never has a beard but he did Movember and sometimes the long stubble felt like needles when we kissed, turn OFF!

Eleganz · 11/02/2023 11:10

MistyRock · 11/02/2023 09:28

I'm not sure why it's so weird. Beards are gross. I'm not talking about a week without shaving. I'm talking about ugly long straggly beards. It's especially gross when the mustache but goes over the lips. Just gross. Its so unkempt looking.

You are entitled to your opinion. It is, however, just your opinion. There is nothing objectively disgusting about facial hair on men, you just don't like it. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions of course.

I can take or leave a beard, my DP looks good to me with and without so I guess that is probably why I'm not fussed either way.

My issue is not that women have different opinions it is posters who are trying to put in mental gymnastics about why expressing a strong opinion to their male partners about their appearance and grooming habits and withdrawing intimacy from them unless they change is acceptable and very different from said male partner expressing the same about them which not acceptable.

MistyRock · 11/02/2023 11:37

PurpleButterflyWings · 11/02/2023 11:02

@MistyRock

I'll retract the last line as its a bit harsh. But seriously 99% of men look far better without the beard. You've got to be extremely attractive and keep it nice to carry it off. Like Jason Momoa. He looks lovely with his beard, but he's got a, good look. It wouldn't look quite as good as Terry down the road wearing his Asda jeans.

What an incredibly silly and inaccurate comment. '99% of men look better without beards?!' Absolutely rubbish. Loads of men look good with beards, whether it's goatees or longer beards. And they look good without them too. To say 99% of men look better without a beard is just rubbish. Indeed, some men look better WITH a beard than without.

I'm not fond of beards myself, and I didn't like kissing my husband when he had one. I also found it quite repugnant at the thought of food in there, as whether men like it/admit it or not, food DOES get caught in beards. 😲I also agree with a pp that beards are ageing. My DH looked 10-12 years older when he had a beard.

I also think it's women, mostly 40-45 plus, who don't like beards. Every single woman I've ever spoke to, or known of, under the age of 36-37, is quite happy for their man to have a beard. Like most men I know under 37, are happy for their woman to have tattoos. Most men I know/know of who are middle aged or older, find tattoos on women quite repugnant and off-putting.

It's definitely an age thing. Tattoos on women are disliked by way more middle aged and older men than younger men, and beards on men are disliked by way more middle aged and older women than younger women..

Okay. So most of my comments are silly and inaccurate. But for me any beard bigger/longer than a goatee style isn't for me. But I am 44 years old so that is probably why. I just cannot abide a long beard. It makes me feel a bit grossed out because of the idea of food in it, and froth from coffees and beer etc. I think I've just seen too many ugly unkept festering beards on men that haven't a clue about keeping them nice.

MistyRock · 11/02/2023 11:43

Eleganz · 11/02/2023 11:10

You are entitled to your opinion. It is, however, just your opinion. There is nothing objectively disgusting about facial hair on men, you just don't like it. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions of course.

I can take or leave a beard, my DP looks good to me with and without so I guess that is probably why I'm not fussed either way.

My issue is not that women have different opinions it is posters who are trying to put in mental gymnastics about why expressing a strong opinion to their male partners about their appearance and grooming habits and withdrawing intimacy from them unless they change is acceptable and very different from said male partner expressing the same about them which not acceptable.

Show quote history

I do like facial hair on men, but not long straggly unkept beards. Johnny Depps' length of beard is perfect, he looks great as do most men with that style of beard, anything longer, for me, and they start to resemble pubic hair? Thick, course and curly.

iamenough2023 · 11/02/2023 18:40

For me it is not about how it looks but how it feels when in contact with my face. I actually quite like bearded men, can be very sexy look, but like a lot of you pointed out, definitely not for everyone. For the record, I am well over 50. However, I do not like how it feels when you kiss; goes in your mouth, your nose, and I definitely always wonder how well it is washed. 😩 Either way, I just think that people should be honest about it. If it makes you ick and not want to be intimate with your partner you should bring this to his attention.

PlaitBilledDuckyPuss · 11/02/2023 18:44

Just tell him you find it a turn-off. It's up to him whether he wants to keep it but it's reasonable to share your opinion.

hattie43 · 11/02/2023 19:06

I like stubble but not full on captain birdseye . I'd have to say something .

QueenCamilla · 12/02/2023 03:33

I can't stand long, scraggly beards, or neck beards that pube out over the shirt collar 😩

Have you seen a scraggly beard man naked? It's... A No.

I don't think a full, bushy beard is comparable to a new hair style (unless it's a green mohawk going from Kate Middleton ringlets). THAT beard is a strong look and it's also a feel.

My ex didn't like my mullet. I don't blame him - I looked like Keith Richards in the mornings. That's the only haircut he didn't like and I've had them all. It would be strange of me to insist to keep that one.