Mind games/control

[EmmaMarie18]

It's been about a week and a half since we had a stupid row which was his reasoning for going out and not coming home for entire weekend 🤯
So he's hardly spoken to me since and turned it around that he's annoyed with me texting his mother 'getting her involved' as I was worried he hadn't come home!
Today now he came home from work didn't speak again! I was popping to the shops and asked if we needed anything trying to be decent where he said something for our dinner..so off I trot to the shops..cook our food..then it's straight back to not speaking to me again! Is he taking the piss?!?!
I've now been laying in bed for the last 3 hours can't sleep and thinking everything over in my mind 😔
We have kids a mortgage and been together nearly 5 years but I feel so bloody miserable

@movingon2022 yep..in public protection..safeguarding children 🤯

We've had a massive blow out this evening he snapped at me again and I told him he has to go which he's refused and I knew he would! He told me basically I can look forward to a few more weeks of this treatment too..I told him the house is going up for sale, his mothers not welcome here and that hes taken the P for far too long!

That sounds like me..he's never been violent but im scared of the silent treatment the snapping the overall behaviour!

I've been doing a course since January and he did nothing but put me down about it belittling me but it's inscentive to prove him wrong and to push myself even more! He's had a go because I've been doing course work today but I do anything to stay out the way! It annoys me because I've always been so supportive of anything hes ever done..he did a course himself not long ago and we didnt see him for 8-10 hours a day and left him study he forgets that!

Perhaps someone has advice as to what a person does if they are married to a member of the police force and a victim of domestic abuse?

OP, Please call Womens aid for advice on this.

They may recommend another police station or a headquarters number.

You poor woman.

@EmmaMarie18 I am so sorry to hear this. Unfortunately there are too many threads here on MN involving abusive and/or narcissistic partners who are in police force. Be careful. Take care of yourself. Get away, do not stay in this relationship too much longer. Hugs.

Hope you're ok @EmmaMarie18.

@EmmaMarie18 @movingon2022 This thread and many of the comments sound exactly like my situation. Not being afraid of someone because of threats of violence, but being afraid of their emotional abuse (and admitting that it is emotional abuse) is an awful feeling. I have endured 3 years of it, having only recently realised it was actually abuse, and realising that whilst he can be a lovely man at times, that was not really him!
Silent treatment for the most pathetic of things, gas lighting, being made to feel so insignificant and stupid, the list is endless! I recently found an interesting article on narcissistic patterns of behaviour which made it all start to make more sense....I've been distancing myself for the past few months and finally moved out of the house yesterday. At the moment I feel awful, guilty, sick...but I know that will pass.
I can't believe so many of us are in this situation, it makes me so sad!

@EmmaMarie18 I really hope you are ok x

My ex use to do the whole 'not speaking' shit......
It's mental/emotional abuse...

I was lucky and we didn't have any house/kids or mortgage...but i would definitely consider your options of either leaving or having a long talk about how this behaviour makes you feel.

@EmmaMarie18

How are you doing OP?