Can a relationship work if you're ENTIRELY seperate?

[Kimexela]

Can a relationship work if two people are entirely separate, as in separate finances, separate houses, no blending of families, no moving in together on the cards?
I've met someone and I really like him, he's just recently bought a place and I like my own space with my daughter and I don't want a man to ever move in with me.
Can a relationship ever progress if two parties are to stay entirely separate? my big thing is that I don't want to share finances or actually live with anyone. I'm content with them coming over a couple of times week and spending the odd weekend together when kids are at alternate parents.
Is this a relationship model that can never progress or does it work for others?

I've read this thread with interest. I am at a point in my marriage where I am unsure if things will work out - I had a thread about it recently.

An ideal solution to my mind would be if we lived apart. I love DH but don't like living with him. I can't imagine he would ever agree to LAT though.

Of course. I think a relationship like that can work brilliantly, so long as it's what you both want.

This is my ideal scenario - I've just not been able to find someone I like who wants the same!
Go for it!!

That is the type of relationship I have had and want for the future. I much prefer living on my own and having my recharge space. I despise talking about mundane boring house/shared finances stuff, the drudgery that can sometimes come with living with someone is something I have never enjoyed. That seeing and sleeping next to someone day in day out is not my thing. I love having space to myself but also really enjoying quality time with the other person. I used to see my ex 1 or 2 evenings in the week, with sleeping over at weekends, but sometimes not seeing at weekends if we both had things on. I feel it is best of both worlds especially if you have kids and your routines etc. Its such outdated views that the only way a relationship can be committed is to live together.

@hopingforbettertimes

It’s been really interesting and as others have said, refreshing, to read these posts. I’m in early 40’s and had a horrific breakup a few years ago with my long term partner. For a while I have been seeing someone who lives a 60 minute drive from me. He has a child (who has autism) 50% of the time and I have wondered if I am getting myself into an impossible situation. After my break up, I really value my home, security and independence and don’t want to risk losing them. What makes it tricky is that I don’t have a child of my own and that is something I am working through at the moment - If I’m happy to give up on the idea of being a mum. However what I have read here has given me bit of hope that this could possibly still work in this type of situation. I do get a bit lonely sometimes and can miss having someone there, but I think I just need to motivate myself, get off my arse and keep busy. I know I’m lucky in a way to have so much time to spend as I would like…..also nice not cleaning up after someone else!

@hopingforbettertimes

I know this is off topic but I'm curious, have you explored the option of going solo re having a child? I'm a single mother by choice and before I became one I'd been wrestling/agonising over an idea whether I'd be able to be with someone (cohabiting or not) who already had a child and I didn't....

@Musttryharder2021 I have given it a little thought but to be honest I’m not sure how I’d manage. I have no family around me to help out and hearing how much child care is makes me think I wouldn’t be able to
cope. So financially I don’t think it’s an option, but to be honest, I haven’t looked into it fully.

Been doing this for five years now. I am in my fifties - 3 kids (live with me) - divorced
He similar age - 2 kids (live with him) - divorced
I have a job, own home etc. The arrangements works. We make time for each other. I am excited to see him. We have dates and holidays. But I also am master of my life and home. No one to annoy me about the mess they leave (other than my lids of course!) and none of the boring mundane crap of married life under one roof of 'did you buy milk? Did you empty the dishwasher?'
It works for us. May not be everyone's cup of tea I know. One day - when all our kids are grown and flown - and if one of us becomes unwell - we may spend more time st one home versus the other. Be a support to each other in that way. But for the time being it works well.

@Nomorepastry

Been in a completely separate relationship for 6 years. We share absolutely nothing and it's only the last couple of months it's started to eat at me that he's not interested in any commitment or living together. I wish I left years ago to be honest but on the good days it works well for me. On my bad days, not so much

I am sort of in this position. Part of me would really like for us to live together and share more- he has no kids and mine are nearly all grown. The other part of me really values the nights that I have to myself. I know there is a reluctance on his part to commit in that way as he is worried about the financial ramifications for him if we split.

Absolutely yes! My partner and I have been together for 4 years. All of our friends keep asking when we're 'moving in together'. We are not!

Both happy with our own houses. We are getting married this year and will keep separate houses. I don't care if other people think it's weird. It works for us. We both love being together and both love having our own space too.

I honestly couldn't live with someone again.