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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DH and I have concern for BIL.....

9 replies

LadyOfTheHollyAndTheIvy · 31/12/2007 22:17

SIL goes out once or twice a month with girls from work. Since having kids, BIL does not drink much at all and hence can't hold his drink so does not bother with drink.

SIL has gone out tonight, leaving him alone with the kids in bed, but she has gone to daughters's friend's mum's for the evening to see the new year in.

Recently, when MIL stayed over at theirs for a night while visiting from Spain (where PIL have retired to) SIL made BIL get up to the kids all thru the night as necessary, despite him working gruelling shifts. (SIL works too in the day, never at night)

He called us earlier on asking if we would like to go over to his with him but we said we couldn't as kids were in bed and DH has had a couple of cans already.
DH said he sounds quite depressed and fed up.
He is really concerned for his bro but BIL is not really one to show any emotion and always put a brave face on.
Just wanted to offload really as we don't think she treats him fairly. Don't get me wrong, I really like her, but we feel she does not treat him well.

Are we wrong or is this pretty normal?

OP posts:
fingerwoman · 31/12/2007 22:25

oh poor him. it doesn't sound normal at all- she sounds very selfish and I feel sorry for him having to deal with all that

LadyOfTheHollyAndTheIvy · 31/12/2007 22:29

we thought it was selfish too.

OP posts:
Shaniece · 31/12/2007 22:35

It's not just men who are selfish. Poor bloke.

NAB3wishesfor2008 · 31/12/2007 22:37

Could you ring him in the morning and ask if he would like to do something?

LadyOfTheHollyAndTheIvy · 31/12/2007 22:40

she will be back then nab. will probo drag her ass back after 12.
no caps and poor typing as have ds1 on my lap.

OP posts:
NAB3wishesfor2008 · 31/12/2007 22:41

If she is back she can look after the kids and he can have some time free.....

anorak · 31/12/2007 22:56

It sounds like their marriage is in trouble if she doesn't want to spend NYE with him, at home or out.

makingnosense · 31/12/2007 23:01

Some people just dont know how lucky they are do they? They treat their OH badly then cry the loudest when the OH wakes up to being a doormat and walks off. I feel sorry for your BIL. There are some people in this life that are just 'takers' and your SIL sounds just like one of them!

LadyOfTheHollyAndTheIvy · 01/01/2008 15:12

Guess what?
He went to pick her up in the car at 12.30!
(She had both the kids with her btw.)

OP posts:
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