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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Ex new gf hassle

12 replies

thisnow · 07/01/2022 16:44

Long story short, husband cheated, I left him last year and am living in a rented place while divorce goes through.
I've not been told he has anyone new, but for several reasons I think he is seeing a woman. I'm fine with him moving on.
But I am really hoping I'm not now being dragged into a situation. I think this woman deliberately drove to my place for whatever reason and when she saw me she turned the car around quickly to drive off in the direction she had come from.
I really don't want any hassle from anyone. Best case scenario - she was just being nosey about where I live.
Would you think it was a one-off just to be nosey?

OP posts:
Santaisstilleatingmincepies · 07/01/2022 16:45

Maybe she bottled asking you about her new bf?

TinfoilTracey · 07/01/2022 16:48

So you don't know he is with anyone and you don't know the girl who drove past was his new gf?

Original poster
thisnow · 07/01/2022 17:00

@TinfoilTracey

So you don't know he is with anyone and you don't know the girl who drove past was his new gf?
Not officially, no. He keeps trying to get back with me so he's unlikely to tell me. Pretty sure it was someone I suspected he was seeing before. Don't know who she is but seen her photo from WhatsApp contact and the driver looked very similar.
OP posts:
ANameChangeAgain · 07/01/2022 17:03

She was sussing out the competition. It sounds as though you have weighed her up too if you recognised her from her WhatsApp photo.

Original poster
thisnow · 07/01/2022 17:09

She doesn't have any competition as I'm divorcing him!

OP posts:
LightSpeeds · 07/01/2022 17:20

@thisnow

She doesn't have any competition as I'm divorcing him!
She might still want to see what you're like, though...
Original poster
thisnow · 07/01/2022 17:27

She wouldn't have known I'd be outside though. If I hadn't been outside she wouldn't have seen me.
Just wondering what she was doing there. There's nothing to see.

OP posts:
ExasperatedTwice · 07/01/2022 17:27

And don't forget, exes filling their new GFS heads with stories about the ex wife being a psycho isn't exactly a new phenomenon.

Bowwowwowoh · 07/01/2022 17:46

Probably this:

Her: (picking up on suspicious vibes ) 'if she's definitely moved out why is her ( insert any random female object ) still here?'
Him: 'I don't know, but I promise you she has moved out.'
Her: 'Where does she live then?'
Him: (for an easy life) '123 Acme Road, blah blah. Go and check if you don't believe me. Her car will be outside.'
Her: 'Right then. I will.'

Pinkbonbon · 07/01/2022 18:01

He is probably trying to play her off against you. Eg, talking about you in a way that makes her rhibk he loves you or is still sleeping with you. Trying to make her feel 'not enough'. Narcissistic triangulation.

Or, telling her you are crazy and causing him problems. Or that you are slagging her off.

Pinkbonbon · 07/01/2022 18:02

Surely that's what social media is for.

Pinkbonbon · 07/01/2022 18:03

@Pinkbonbon

Surely that's what social media is for.
Sorry that was a reply to @lightspeeds
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