Advice about my ex

[Nics132]

Hi. I was with my partner for 12 years and 4 months ago he left me for another woman he reckons he only meet once and he told me he told me he don’t love me anymore. But know he is begging me to take him back because he is missing me and our 3 children. But is still with the girl he cheated on me with. I am so confused and is really getting me down. I am try to get over him and it seems like every time I’m getting there he says this and I’m right back to square one. Please can you give me some advice

He has behaved appallingly. Has he cheated before?

Just cut your ties & be civil
But I'd say at least separate lives fir a while. That's not something you can smooth over. Especially if he's still with OW. Wtf!

Ignore him and focus on the children

Example, "I love you I miss you I've made a dreadful mistake!" Reply do you want to see the kids on x or y day? "But I luurve yooouuuu" " I can do 10am or after 12 let me know which day/time suits you best"

Totally shut it down literally do not reply to any miss you emotional nonsense if he says he misses the kids don't engage either just agree with him and move on

Nope… You would never trust him again and he would never respect you. (Sounds like he didn’t anyway - nor does he respect her. What a catch!)

They nearly all do that. Ignore. I told my ex he couldn't come back because if he did, we'd both spend our time looking for better partners.

It's usually thoughts of saving money and having a comfortable everyday life that make them want to come home.

The question you should be asking yourself is whether you could ever trust him again? If not then the anxiety that will cause you will be worse than you're feeling now surely?

He's realised the grass wasn't greener after all but funny how he hasn't burnt his bridges by still living with the OW but telling you he wants to return. How long before he does this again though? He's just showing he can't be loyal to anyone! What a dick!

Chances are once you decide that you don't want him back that you'll feel heaps better and it'll gradually get easier. Sadness over a split occurs in nearly all cases even when you know its for the best.

He's not being fair. Be firm. If in the future, you really want to give it another try obviously you can. (Sounds like you deserve better though. )Chances are though, you'll be over him and won't want him anyway.

Is he living with her?