Would you date a man who

[curiouscat1]

Would you date a man whose wife had divorced him because of adultery with prostitutes?

Definitely not!

🤢🤢🤢

Never.

So a straw poll (!) of mumsnetters reveals that nobody would date this man.
Now the question is, why then would a woman be dating such a man a few weeks after the wife left? Scenarios have been put forward as to how this might occur but these really only work with a totally new woman. This is a woman who the man knew before the divorce, I think the wife knows of her too, and both come from a close-knit community.

No.

Your boundaries must be shot to shit to continue dating a man after finding this out. Which probably makes you his ideal partner.

Definitely not.

He is participating in exploiting women. I would be turned off immensely.

why then would a woman be dating such a man a few weeks after the wife left?

No boundaries
Doesn't know
Low self esteem

Perhaps the woman believes his lies.

Christ no

Hell no

So, the wife is pissed off that she's stormed out (quite rightly) after her husband has been sleeping with prostitutes, yet he has found a new girlfriend a mere handful of weeks after.

The injustice that a cheating arsehole has found someone really quickly, where as she's been betrayed and had her life turned upside down.

The reality? She should really be pitying the poor bugger who's standards are so low that they'll settle for a man who does that.

No no no. This man clearly has no respect for women and he had to get a prostitute to cheat. What a wanker.

I think reading your update, it goes back to the fact that some women will date any man as long as they have a man. Sad but true

I have a friend who is married to an absolute bastard in every way. She does nothing but complain about him but then rounds it off by saying, "well he may be a bastard, but he's my bastard". Go figure

Nope.

I'd run like fuck.

No

No. Never.

@DowntonCrabby

Nope. I wouldn’t date a man who had any history with prostitutes, regardless of whether he was single or cheating on his wife.

This. I don’t care why the wife divorced him - it could be because he left the cap off the toothpaste for all I care, we’re all looking for different things in a husband and someone else’s dealbreaker isn’t always yours.

However I can’t think of many women who would want a man who’s paid for sex. I know probably more of them have done than would admit to it, but tbh I’d really rather not know if my man was such a skank . Any man who told you about it upfront is basically saying “here’s a massive reason not to date me. I have no respect for women, think consent can be bought and I invest heavily in the drug and people-trafficking industries.”

@MollysDolly

So, the wife is pissed off that she's stormed out (quite rightly) after her husband has been sleeping with prostitutes, yet he has found a new girlfriend a mere handful of weeks after.

The injustice that a cheating arsehole has found someone really quickly, where as she's been betrayed and had her life turned upside down.

The reality? She should really be pitying the poor bugger who's standards are so low that they'll settle for a man who does that.

This.

I doubt she knows about the prostitutes. Maybe about the cheating but not all of it.

My exh had an affair and it wasn’t a secret why we separated, yet he went on to start another relationship after he finished with the ow. His current gf will know why we split as there are too many mutual friends around to not know, yet she probably thinks “well he won’t do it to me”. That’s what I thought, and his previous partners before me yet he did it to all of us. Love is blind and all that, until it smacks you in the face.

Could there be an alternative explanation though?

But I’m answer to the question, it’s a big, fat “NO”. I wouldn’t touch any man with a barge pole who I knew had cheated on his wife/partner.

No

Maybe she’s a ‘cool girl’ who thinks “sex work is work” and that it’s empowering for women to be used as vessels for men to dump semen into. Maybe she doesn’t know.. yet. Maybe she’s ok with it because she thinks cheating with a colleague or someone from his running club involves feelings and is therefore worse than “just sex” (a view put forward by many MNers on a thread yesterday about whether it’s worse for a man to cheat with someone he pays or not).

That would be a no from me dog.

@curiouscat1

Could there be an alternative explanation though?

For what OP? Can you explain?

I’d imagine that either a) the man has convinced his new girlfriend that his ex-wife is lying and made up the lies because she was bitter and jealous when he wanted to leave; or b) the woman has decided of her own volition that the ex-wife could well be an unreliable narrator making up lies.

How does anyone ever know what their ex has told their new partner or what that partner chooses to think.