Been together with DH for many decades with one grown and independent DC. Generally, have a good supportive relationship – and he has always totally shared the load. However, DH is not very sociable. Shortly after we got together he stopped seeing his old friends (because he had me) and was not too bothered with seeing my friends. I carried on with my own social life and he got most of his social needs met at work.
Fast forward to DH retiring, work friends were just that, thus he was left with no social life. So, I set up a regular social event from my networks in order to include him and this was very successful. However, just before the Pandemic, I realised he was involved in an EA with one of the women in the group (saw them fucking holding hands). I told him if it did not stop NOW our marriage was over. It stopped. But there was quite a fall out in my friendship network that has been hurtful and damaging for me.
That particular social event stopped abruptly due to the Pandemic. Now, however, DH is asking me to set it up again. I feel reluctant to do this. I just felt so fucking used by them both last time and I do not entirely trust that the EA won’t take off again (she is one charismatic and attractive fucker). On the other hand, DH has no social life. I do love him and I don’t want him to be lonely as this is bad for his mental and physical health and in these challenging times it is a hard thing to get a social life going. WWYD?