This is long and I'll never be able to explain the full story. I am mentally drained.
I left H 2 weeks ago and staying at my mums. H I believe has narcissist traits and possibly some emotional abuse. I'm very confused by all this and I start counselling next week.
H has been up and down the whole time I've been at my mums. He's been caring, he's told me it's over, he's told me to get my things, he's told me I'm mentally unstable, he's apologised, he's begging for me back, he's finally agreeing to marriage counselling. I understand he's hurt and very upset.
Our relationship was pretty much over until last night. We still need to car share and DS is with me at my mums so I am still seeing him but only so he can see DS and get the car when needed. He has started to use the spare car key so we don't need to communicate but DS saw him last night as he came to collect it....he had gone home to an empty wardrobe as I moved all my clothes earlier in the day so he was upset. DS isn't well and that upset him that he wasn't there too look after him. Not that he ever did. He never did anything which is one of the many reasons I left.
Since then he has not stopped contacting me about getting back together. He has some sort of hold over me and even though I don't want to go back, I can't seem to be strong. I haven't agreed to go back, I just haven't said anything and he's done all the talking as usual.
One minute he says he loves me, the next he says he's having 'thoughts' that I am messaging other people - I'm not! The next he's saying he's lovely and Xmas is coming and what is he going to do, and then that goes into he wants me home and the whole cycle starts again.
I sent him a very long message to say he is not helping my mental health and I need time and space and basically to just back off. He then tells me he is going to leave me alone and wait for me to contact him. He is on the way to collect his dcs up (my step children) and our DS can see his siblings tomorrow.
He then calls again and I ignore the call.
The next thing I know he's at my mums door with his dcs asking if he and the dcs can come in because they want to see my and my dcs (from a previous relationship). I love my step kids very much, I couldn't say no to them! They know we have separated and so do my dcs.
I was so angry I was shaking. It was incredibly awkward but I could not say no. It was the worst possible situation I could be put in.
So all the dcs start playing like nothing has ever happened except for dsd who is sat on the sofa crying. It was awful.
I shouted at H in the kitchen asking why he would put dsd through this. He told me he was calling to ask if they could come but I declined the call. Even if I answered the call, I would of been on loud speaker and it would of been incredibly awkward for me to say no seeing them.
H then carried on bombarding me with reasons why we need to be together.
I'm so emotionally drained. They have gone now and I had a takeaway ordered. I feel numb.
Just to add - I'm staying at my mums but she is away this weekend.
What an idiot I am, I have absolutely no idea what to do next