Background: my ex was mean, controlling, and emotionally abusive and I left him because of this.
He insists on staying in our daughter's life (I realise this is a good thing on balance) but he continues to be mean and try to control me to the extent he can, through her.
He has started seeing a new woman who also has a small daughter. They took the children on holiday together over half term, though supposedly have only actually been in a relationship for a month or so. (I believe that they have been seeing each other for months but that he was lying to me).
My daughter has returned with stories of how Daddy took care of her the whole time, how he would read to the two girls while his girlfriend lay in bed with them, etc etc
When we were together, he would never have spent this kind of time with me. He would have said it wasn't efficient and he would have left me get our daughter bathed and to bed alone while he had a drink or something.
He also has been telling me that I wasn't a great mum because I work full time. The girlfriend apparently is a better mum who only works part time.
I maintain as little contact with him as possible and I have been trying to move on since I left two years ago. But this is absolutely killing me, the idea that maybe he is capable of being a good dad and partner, the thought that he would be caring and loving toward someone else, the sneaking suspicion that maybe the reason he wasn't nice to me really is that I'm too difficult, too demanding, too argumentative.
Help! What do I do? How do I cope?