Definitely moved on from my bolt out the blue

[aleC4]

Thought I'd start a new thread for the times when I feel I need to continue my story.

Sorry I missed your earlier thread but did your ex move out because of another woman and does he now have any regrets do you think?

Yes to the first part, who knows to the second but if so that ship sailed a long time ago!
This a link to my last thread which also contains a link to the first. It’s a long story!
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2816861-2017-following-on-from-my-bolt-out-the-blue

Poor old ds is finding it tough being stuck in his room. All day gaming and room service are starting to lose their appeal now.
He's annoyed that he's missed out on all the half term things he had planned and can't go to the Halloween party he was looking forward to.
He's also stressing about school next week. He's in sixth form now and they do so much in just one lesson. He's emailed his teachers to let them know so hopefully they'll send the work he's missing.
He did so well in his GCSEs ( 8 9s and 2 8s) and takes his work pretty seriously.

That’s rotten luck for your son and you all. Your son is incredibly bright and hardworking so even if he does miss a tad his work ethic will enable him to catch up I’m sure. You must be very proud of him (them both) as you have done the bulk of the heavy lifting with them.

Maybe pencil in a nice meal/trip out for you all in a few weeks when he’s recovered so you all have something to look forward to.

It’s interesting I’m not a prolific poster but I’ve always been drawn to a few threads where the OP is quietly efficient, dignified and competent (and writes well). I know you said you don’t always feel like that but that is what you convey. I’m sure your DC are very proud of you too.

Oh I read your entire previous threads in one go the other day and shall be following this one too. Hope your story has the happiest of endings for you, with or without a new love interest.

Thanks both, @KatherineSiena your words are too kind.
These threads were a godsend for me in those early dark days and it was so important for me to have somewhere to write things down. I like to go back and read them now and again to feel proud of myself at his far I've come 😳
We're definitely going to plan something nice for when ds is out of isolation and I've bitten the bullet and booked us a holiday for next summer too.
It's been a strange week but I do feel rested ready for a new half term. I've got a slight change of tile when I go back so something new to get my teeth into.

@KatherineSiena

That’s rotten luck for your son and you all. Your son is incredibly bright and hardworking so even if he does miss a tad his work ethic will enable him to catch up I’m sure. You must be very proud of him (them both) as you have done the bulk of the heavy lifting with them.

Maybe pencil in a nice meal/trip out for you all in a few weeks when he’s recovered so you all have something to look forward to.

It’s interesting I’m not a prolific poster but I’ve always been drawn to a few threads where the OP is quietly efficient, dignified and competent (and writes well). I know you said you don’t always feel like that but that is what you convey. I’m sure your DC are very proud of you too.

KatherineSiena’s post expresses how I feel. I am glad you have a continuation thread. I imagine teaching and studying during these times are very challenging but you and your children’s positive attitudes and diligent work ethics should result in satisfying outcomes.

Ds is finally released today!
He's off to work and then seeing his friends later, he can't wait.
It's been a long 10 days for him.

Oh I'm so glad you started a new thread. I followed your old threads (I was a different username back then), I'm so glad to see you're all doing well, it gives me a bit of hope to be quite honest. I love reading your updates x

Happy Release Day!

Dd and I have done the Christmas decorations tonight.
It's made me really emotional. I know we have a really tough few weeks ahead of us celebrating our first Christmas without my dad.
I'm just praying that there's no restrictions meaning our plans are spoilt.

I'm finding things tough at the moment. Getting all the Christmas stuff out has really hit me harder than I thought it would. It's going to be a tough one this year without my dad.
I'm also fed up of the kids right now too. They are both just so lazy around the house. They do absolutely nothing to help and seem to have also stopped even tidying up after themselves.
I'm going to have to come down on them like a ton of bricks this week, I've warned them.

Christmas - the first one - must be hard for you and also for the two of them. Anyway, I hope things are getting better as Dec progresses. No doubt hose decorations are painful reminders - but I hope they have good memories too. Best wishes from here.

Wishing you a Christmas of warmth and light and some happy memories to share. I hope it can lift you from the sadness and that all of you are the better for it.

Happy New Year!
I hope you managed to have an enjoyable time over the holidays. I am glad to have Christmas over and done with as it is associated with too much nostalgia for me and COVID-19 made it more poignant.
Here’s to a more normal and hopefully fun-filled year for everyone.

Happy new year x

Hi aleC4

I’ve name changed (again) but I followed your thread from the start.

How was Christmas ? Hope the kids are helping a bit more and how lovely that you have booked a holiday for this year.

Hi thanks for checking in with me.
Christmas actually went really well thanks. I think the anticipation was worse than the event really.
We all managed to avoid covid which was a miracle as I was surrounded the week before! We went to my mum's and Aldo spent time with both my sisters and their families.
I found New Year's Eve hard. It was the first year I'd started without my dad and that felt wrong. It was his anniversary yesterday which hit me hard too but my lovely friends got me through the day.
Dd struggled yesterday too. I got a call from her school to say she was upset. I'm glad they look out for them in a pastoral sense and aren't just bothered about the academic stuff.
We've all returned to work/school now and are back in the swing of things.
In other news exh has now become a step-grandad! 🤣 His girlfriends daughter has had a baby at 16. The kids think it's hilarious that he's a grandad. They have still been seeing him but only once a week now as they are just too busy. They did actually stay over during the holidays which they haven't done for ages and he also die t some time with them both 1:1 which was nice.

Hi AleC, I remember your original thread and follow up. It's so nice to see how things panned out for you. When everything kicked off with you I was going through the same thing. I wish I had your courage though, as I worked at mine. I'm now pretty unhappy and just waiting for the day to tell him it's over but need to be in a better financial position and the youngest not in school. Only a few years and I've faked it for 5+years already so a few more won't hurt me. I hope 2022 is a great year for you and the children. X

Happy New Year to you and your DC.

The firsts are hard aren’t they? Several years after my parents’ deaths I’m still caught off guard very occasionally and have a wobble. But time does help, we keep their memories alive and chat about them, especially funny moments. It’s good to hear the DC have good pastoral care at school.

I hope this year is a good one for you and you and the DC continue to thrive.

Hi @aleC4 just stumbled on this thread, have been following your other ones. How are you/your DC's doing now?

@MrsMarkRonson I am good thanks.
Life is ticking along here nicely.
I continue to learn day by day the best way to be a parent to two very different teenagers whilst also trying to find time for me.
I feel like a constant taxi service! 🤣🤣
Sometimes I feel like I'm fumbling in the dark with how to parents my teens but we talk a lot and I'm very honest if I feel I've messed up.
I do consider myself very lucky that my kids talk to me about stuff, but then part of me thinks bloody hell getting to this was bloody hard work!!!!

Hi @aleC4 hope you and children are doing well. I followed your first thread but then got caught up with everything going on in my own life that was not too dissimilar to yours. If you don't mind me asking, did your exh marry the OW and do they now have any children together? Apologies if this is in the thread already as I have not had the chance to read through the previous threads.

I too have been thinking about @aleC4. I often wonder how she is doing. I have followed her thread since the very first day. There were so many ups and downs for her and the children but throughout Alec4 handled each issue so well despite not believing it herself at times. I was always inspired by the way she managed her life and her childrens’ needs - what a strong lady she is. So if you are reading this Alec please know MN’s are still interested in how you are now. I have posted a few times, sometimes under a different user name. I really hope you and your lovely children are well and happy.

An old follower chipping in to see how you are. I hope you and your children are well and still thriving. You deserve to be happy.