Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Found Dh secret viagra stash.....

101 replies

Crustyoddsocks · 04/10/2021 20:16

Fuck.....long post alert....
How much do you trust your partner? I think I maybe only trust DH 90%.
Recently found an empty blister pack and an almost empty blister pack (7 gone 1 remaining) of viagra in his wallet. I was trying to cover my tracks after washing his wallet by mistake so not intentially snooping, just trying to dry everything before he noticed .Blush Ive never snooped before as never felt the need to.

I was pretty shocked by the discovery not because I give 2 hoots about people taking viagra but because I dont think dh needs it. I’ve also not really noticed any difference in performance and we havent been that active recently. We are not communicating very well and have hit a rough patch/arnt getting on. So I have a bit of a bad feeling that the viagra might not have been for my benefit Sad
Think I have issues/anxiety re trust possibly due to my parents ‘perfect marriage’ crumbling overnight and my dad being a serial philanderer/not the person we thought he was. So this has impacted on me not trusting DH or anyone else 100%. I dont want to be naive/ put my head in the sand which I think my mum did (not that I blame her). So my default is suspicious/ not a push over or maybe I have serious trust issues?
We have been together 15 years, married 10 I honestly trust DH a lot, just not totally. Could there be a rational explanation? Is this a normal secret to keep? I suppose he could have bought for our anniversary weekend away a few months ago but he never mentioned it.

I just cant shrug off the doubt. Why would he not tell me if its for us? Is it wrong also to think its a bit sleazy ie that he wants to improve his performance/enjoyment? I just thought we could have spoken about if there was an innocent reason.
Urgh do I confront him? Casually speak about viagra?! Go all Nancy drew on his wallet and monitor it, see if the other one disappears? Further snooping?

OP posts:
Baileysandcream · 04/10/2021 23:22

Narcissist?

Anordinarymum · 04/10/2021 23:24

OP do you have sex together?

If all is well then that is why he is taking it.

No man wants to admit he can't get it on any more. It's embarrassing.

Simples

Timeisavirtue · 04/10/2021 23:31

DP did the same after one time, he’s stopped buying them now but he couldn’t perform one time and he took them secretly so it didn’t happen again. I didn’t push him on it, he run out and now everything seems fine, his issue was a one off. Maybe confront him with a bit of sensitivity.

cheshirebloke · 04/10/2021 23:31

Yep, that was meant tongue in cheek lol. People seem to throw that term around far too readily on the relationships section.

And yes, I can't understand why anyone would take viagra over cialis, as that seems better in every way. Maybe viagra might work for men with really bad ED if cialis hasn't. But I'd say to always try cialis first. There's even a 'daily' dose of cialis available - you just take a pill every day and the effects are low level and continuous, which seems much more natural than an 'on demand' basis.

hashbrownsandwich · 04/10/2021 23:34

Sildenafil can be taken for pulmonary hypertension. Just rule that out first.

me4real · 04/10/2021 23:42

No man wants to admit he can't get it on any more

I think a man wouldn't tend to buy viagra for medicinal reasons unless he'd experienced an erection failure in action with his partner.

If they'd struggled when by themselves while masturbating, then they would hope that things would be different with a woman actually in front of them, and would try that (at least with a longstanding partner) rather than take viagra as a prophylactic/pre-emptive strike.

Some men take it for a boost/recreationally rather than because they have ED.

I suppose with a new partner a man might use it to try and put on their best performance.

We are all guessing really @Crustyoddsocks . You would need to find out further info. I don't think just asking is any use either. x

Earlgrey19 · 04/10/2021 23:47

OP I had a partner who took viagra with me to overcome premature ejaculation. Different men might respond differently to it (and I see posts above suggesting different experiences but my DP would had hours of erections, sex was not usually just one go, and the drug would make him really red in the face (it’s a cardiovascular drug that sends the blood rushing around). Talk to your husband about it?

sammylady37 · 05/10/2021 05:55

@BBOA

The fact it’s in his wallet suggests some sort of deviance. If it was for you it would be in his sock drawer!
‘Deviance’ Hmm

To me is suggests a man who is embarrassed about needing them and doesn’t want to admit it to his wife, so he keeps them hidden and on his person so it’s easy to take one without her knowing. If they were in his sock drawer she might find them (we know she does the laundry) and she would most likely be in the bedroom with him when he needs to take one.

Thewookiemustgo · 05/10/2021 09:24

‘It’s Mumsnet so he must be cheating’.
I think people fall into two camps here. The vast majority of men, In sure, use viagra for their ED within a committed, faithful relationship. They also might find it an embarrassing topic to discuss with their partner, or worry that their partner might think they don’t find them as attractive as they used to, which drives the use underground, easier to hide it than talk about it. Obviously issues around embarrassment and worrying about potentially upsetting your partner would only worsen the ED.

However, there are sadly others here where hidden viagra did mean an affair was going on.

It’s not his use of viagra here, the go issue s why he needs to hide it from his partner. Innocently just keeping it private for his own self esteem, or because he doesn’t want her to think she doesn’t satisfy him, or cheating? All are possibilities.
Only the OP knows him well enough to be surprised and worried by his hiding things from her or not, and she’s clearly worried enough to ask Mumsnet.

OP, if you ask him about it, would “I’m using it for us and was a bit embarrassed to tell you” be enough to allay your concerns? The problem is that that a exactly what he would say if he was cheating. In my case sadly hidden viagra meant an affair. Our credit card bills had nothing worrying in them because he conducted his affair using cash. I didn’t have access to his personal bank account, I was never refused it because I didn’t ask, trusted him completely. He’d had the account when I met him as students donkeys’ years ago and when we started living together just kept our original separate accounts (loads of direct debits going out of them, salaries paid in, far easier to just keep them) and opened new joint ones. I never never in over thirty years suspected him of anything.

This is a tough one OP. Asking won’t give you your answer and if he’s cheating you’ve given him the heads up and he’ll just be more careful. I’d play the long game and just be more observant. And yes, this is a horrible thing to do. But I wish I’d done it. Affairs can take place at work during lunch hours and never impact the time people come home. You’d suspect nothing. Shift working is a gift to affairs, you can say what you like if nobody ever checks your hours or pay. I’d keep an eye on his usage (heavy usage but no sex with you) and if there’s nothing to cause concern, nothing more niggling you, then just gently ask about it. If he’s more irritable with you, more critical or distant, glued to his phone or leaves it in his pocket or face down more often, is buying more clothes, taking more interest in his appearance etc, these things might be relevant.

Sorry OP, only you know. Trust your spidey senses, it was all I had and they worked.

ravenmum · 05/10/2021 10:39

Only the OP knows him well enough to be surprised and worried by his hiding things from her or not, and she’s clearly worried enough to ask Mumsnet
OP makes it sound in her OP as if she generally has big trust issues from her own past.

OP, my exh had an affair, and I trusted him enough for him to get away with a full affair for more than a year, plus some fooling around for another couple of years before. Contrary to others' experience, he was able to lie and cheat without it being obvious at the time. And when I did suspect him, I wanted actual evidence, and did not immediately assume the worst before putting a torch to life as the kids knew it.

You say your mum was naive, but do you know how much she guessed at the time, what your dad was telling her, or what decisions she was making, for what reasons?
Use your spidey senses, yes. But you don't have to be "less naive" than your mum; being more suspicious could itself have a detrimental effect on your life, and there's no great benefit to having suspected an affair earlier if it just means you spend a few more months feeling bad but having no proof.

Crustyoddsocks · 05/10/2021 11:40

Thanks everyone.
Its defo viagra. It says viagra on the blister pack and the remaining diamond shaped pill is blue.
He noticed his wallet had been moved and asked if it got wet. I played dumb. He didnt seem v agitated and is back to leaving wallet lying around. Ive been monitoring the wallet and the empty pack is gone and I couldnt find it in any bins but it was rubbish day yest so would be easy to cover tracks.
No other changes in behaviour.
I think Im really bad for thinking the worst (as are a lot of you) and think its a way of protecting myself, that somehow I would feel better if I discovered it and was proactive rather than reactive .A way of control in a situation I have no control over.
Think my mum was totally blindsided by my dads betrayal (we all were) but she has said looking back there were signs that she chose to ignore/was naive about it.

Ive been quite anxious and stressed at work and ive been really paranoid and I do wonder viagra or not I might have found something else to fixate on/ worry about cheating.
No massive changes in behaviour here but he is going out with his brother and cousin in town tomorrow as his cousin is visiting, I did ask for an invite but apparently its a lads night and no other WAGS are invited. Ill be monitoring closely, so far story checks out and MIL has confirmed cousin in town on business...wouldnt have given that a second thought but its a potential opportunity.....

OP posts:
Viddy2021 · 05/10/2021 11:52

@bigbaggyeyes

He could be using it with you and it's a sign that maybe he's embarrassed or feels awkward telling you.

Or he could be using it with someone else.

In your shoes I'd monitor it, see if the last one disappears online with the last time you have sex

If it were for you, they wouldn't be in his wallet....
Naunet · 05/10/2021 12:09

It's no fucking wonder men are scared to talk about this issue when women are so ill informed about it

Oh seriously, knock it off for fuck sake. Like women don’t go through their own shit with periods, child birth complications, menopause etc. We’re not responsible for men’s issues too.

ravenmum · 05/10/2021 14:02

she has said looking back there were signs that she chose to ignore/was naive about it
There were signs I couldn't place when my exh started having his "proper" affair, but that all slotted into place later when I worked out exactly what had gone on. For example, him coming back tanned from a work trip - he could have got the tan from the trip, but when I discovered he'd been on an actual holiday, the tan made more sense.
And I was naive in that I thought he would have waited longer than a couple of weeks before jumping into bed with her. But I'd rather be that "naive" person than someone who was constantly on edge, looking out for signs. I think you're right when you say that the urge not to be naive comes from a fear of losing control (and looking like a fool). Personally, starting a new relationship after my nasty experience, it has been helpful to me, instead, to remind myself that you're never in control of a relationship, as you don't control your partner. So if they do something like that, it's not your fault. And they are the fool for not sorting out their own life better.
It also helps if you know roughly what would happen if you broke up, so that you are not also afraid of the great unknown.

Hope that your stress at work sorts itself out soon; make sure you're looking after yourself.

VanGoghsDog · 05/10/2021 14:03

@Naunet

It's no fucking wonder men are scared to talk about this issue when women are so ill informed about it

Oh seriously, knock it off for fuck sake. Like women don’t go through their own shit with periods, child birth complications, menopause etc. We’re not responsible for men’s issues too.

Jesus.

Being aware of men's issues does not preclude you from deserving understanding of your issues too. It's not a race to the bottom. How about trying to find a bit of empathy?

Naunet · 05/10/2021 14:11

Jesus

Being aware of men's issues does not preclude you from deserving understanding of your issues too. It's not a race to the bottom. How about trying to find a bit of empathy?

Implying that men have issues with this purely because of women’s lack of understanding, is misogynistic bullshit. How many men do you know that have an in-depth knowledge of menopause? Do women blame men for this? Do they suggest that the reason they don’t talk about it, is all men’s fault for not being understanding? Would YOU suggest that?

Having empathy is one thing we should all have, that is not the same as blaming women for men’s sexual health issues.

2bazookas · 05/10/2021 14:39

"I accidentally washed your viagra; we need to talk"

Start from there.

Feelingparanoid · 05/10/2021 14:48

A few years ago out of the blue my husband suddenly presented me with some Viagra pills one evening. At the time I thought it was odd because he wasn't having any issues with ED, but he explained that he just fancied trying Viagra to see what happened.

Nothing much different happened. And I didn't even bother to monitor when or if he had taken a pill or whether the pills were disappearing. I trusted him completely.

Now I know that the Viagra was introduced to our relationship during a time he had started seeing escorts.

It's a possibility, OP, along with the alternative explanation that he is having ED issues and is too embarrassed to say.

altmember · 05/10/2021 15:10

What would you all say to a man who came on here and and said he'd found out his wife was taking HRT in secret? Is she having an affair? Should he trust her, confront her, or go Clouseo on her? Does it mean their own sex life is fake because without it she wouldn't be interested?

girlmom21 · 05/10/2021 15:14

It's really sad that people in long term relationships/marriages can't just have open conversations.

Your reluctance to question him is probably the same reason he hasn't discussed it with you.

PlantDoctor · 05/10/2021 15:19

I'd be more concerned it was in his wallet. Wouldn't the bedroom be better if it was for your benefit?

Naunet · 05/10/2021 15:24

@altmember

What would you all say to a man who came on here and and said he'd found out his wife was taking HRT in secret? Is she having an affair? Should he trust her, confront her, or go Clouseo on her? Does it mean their own sex life is fake because without it she wouldn't be interested?
HRT is not the same as viagra 🤣

There’s many reasons a woman takes HRT, an affair is extremely unlikely to be one of them! It’s not really an equivalent example. But let’s play pretend for a sec and imagine it is. Yes, some people would say she might be having an affair. Some wouldn’t. Just like this thread.

Thewookiemustgo · 05/10/2021 15:32

Sadly the fact is in any relationship, that anyone might be in a relationship where they do actually have open and honest conversations, right up until the moment one of them has something to hide. Most people are open and honest about stuff they are prepared to be open and honest about.
It’s really easy to think everything in the garden is rosy until you discover otherwise. People hiding something tend to act as if they are not.
The only issue here is the hiding and omitting to tell OP. Hopefully the lack of conversation about it and location of the viagra is nothing at all to be worried about.

Feelingparanoid · 05/10/2021 15:33

@altmember your line of questioning might have worked better had you used an example of a female Viagra, rather than HRT.

MarshmallowSwede · 05/10/2021 15:36

I would just ask him has be been taking any viagra?

This is your husband, not some stranger on the street. Surely you can ask and explain how you found them.