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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

To think she is obsessed with my husband?

74 replies

Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 10:51

I’ll keep it short but I think my husbands friends wife is obsessed with my husband or at least has a crush. I’ve been out with her a few times and one night we were all having a drink at another friends house, my husband is quite a quiet man and she blurted out she’d love to know what was going on in that mysterious mind of his 😐 she’s made other comments but that one has really made me think she might be obsessed

OP posts:
Sassypants82 · 30/09/2021 10:53

On that example alone, obsessed ia quite far reaching tbh.

maslinpan · 30/09/2021 10:54

That sounds like a pretty trivial remark to me. She was making a slightly awkward attempt to get him to join in a conversation, that's all.

Original poster
Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 10:55

He wasn’t in the room when she had said that.

OP posts:
Feelingparanoid · 30/09/2021 10:59

Who did she address her comment to? What else has she said? From that comment alone it sounds more like she's intrigued by him because he's quiet.

Justcallmebebes · 30/09/2021 11:00

I'm not sure on that information I would say obsessed and unless you have other examples I wouldn't even say she had a crush on him either.

I recently spoke of my friend's brother having hidden depths but I don't fancy him at all

Bookworm20 · 30/09/2021 11:01

Its a bit of an odd thing to say, especially as he wasn't even there. But that alone doesn't suggest she is obsessed with him. What else has she said?

Original poster
Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 11:03

She has said before that my husband is jealous of other men looking/ talking to her. She’s made comments that she likes how he looks/has a nice body. She just compliments him too much IMO I don’t think I’ve ever said anything about her husband apart that he’s a nice man. When she said that it threw me off a bit as we were just talking about him being quiet in general

OP posts:
Feelingparanoid · 30/09/2021 11:06

Did you ask her why on earth she thinks that your husband would be jealous of other men looking at her?

Crystalvas · 30/09/2021 11:06

Does your DH know about these comments? What does think of it all?

Original poster
Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 11:09

Because an argument happened a while back at a friends house over one of the people at the party eyeing her up and flirting with her my husband stepped in to try and dissolve the situation ( I was their at the time) so now she continually makes comments about my husband like he was her hero or something and she thinks it’s because he was jealous I’ve asked him about it and he laughs it off and said she’s a bit weird, when we’re on our own she makes these comments never in front of the husbands

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OrangeJuiceAndNoodles · 30/09/2021 11:09

This sounds nuts

frozendaisy · 30/09/2021 11:11

She can be obsessed as she likes, it's what your husband does with it that matters.

Take it as a compliment he's still got it!

MonicaGellerBing · 30/09/2021 11:11

She's not your friend. Making comments about your husband being jealous of men speaking to her is out of order and she's completely disrespecting you and your marriage. Get rid of her

girlmom21 · 30/09/2021 11:12

She's probably just winding you up. I would if I could see you getting this tetchy. Especially as she never makes any kind of comment in front of him.

Seesawmummadaw · 30/09/2021 11:14

@Ladyraven0483

Because an argument happened a while back at a friends house over one of the people at the party eyeing her up and flirting with her my husband stepped in to try and dissolve the situation ( I was their at the time) so now she continually makes comments about my husband like he was her hero or something and she thinks it’s because he was jealous I’ve asked him about it and he laughs it off and said she’s a bit weird, when we’re on our own she makes these comments never in front of the husbands
She sounds like an attention seeker.

The first comment wouldn’t worry me. I would love to know what’s going on in quite a few people’s minds!

Bluntness100 · 30/09/2021 11:14

Sounds weird, does your husband have a thing for her? Why did he need to step in with someone flirting with her? That’s odd.

Are you sure the issue is not him?

Spindrifting · 30/09/2021 11:20

@Bluntness100

Sounds weird, does your husband have a thing for her? Why did he need to step in with someone flirting with her? That’s odd.

Are you sure the issue is not him?

Yes, that sounds quite mad to me -- unless the man flirting/eyeing her up was actually grabbing your 'friend' or being aggressive in some way, why on earth would a bystander 'step in'?
Bettysnow · 30/09/2021 11:21

Anything she says concerning your husband i would repeat to her husband and ask what his opinion is? Her reaction will tell you all you need to know.

Theunamedcat · 30/09/2021 11:25

I got accused of this when I said my friends partner clearly had hidden depths what I really meant was I couldn't tell what she saw in him we are no longer friends....

Why did your husband feel the need to stop someone flirting with her?

Original poster
Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 11:25

No because it wasn’t over them looking at her he stepped in when it was getting out of hand and told them to all calm the fuck down. That was it. For some reason she keeps making the comments even though I’ve said it wasn’t because he was jealous it’s because he didn’t want a fight to break out, but she seems to keep repeating the comments now and again especially when we’ve had a few drinks, I feel like I have to put up with her because she is my husbands friends wife but her comments are starting to piss me off and I feel like I’m going to have to say something

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Original poster
Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 11:26

Just wanted to see if I was in the wrong

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MzHz · 30/09/2021 11:27

@MonicaGellerBing

She's not your friend. Making comments about your husband being jealous of men speaking to her is out of order and she's completely disrespecting you and your marriage. Get rid of her
Yeah, this
MzHz · 30/09/2021 11:28

Let (and I don’t mean it like allow etc) your h do stuff with his mate but knock the joint stuff on the head.

Spindrifting · 30/09/2021 11:28

@Ladyraven0483

No because it wasn’t over them looking at her he stepped in when it was getting out of hand and told them to all calm the fuck down. That was it. For some reason she keeps making the comments even though I’ve said it wasn’t because he was jealous it’s because he didn’t want a fight to break out, but she seems to keep repeating the comments now and again especially when we’ve had a few drinks, I feel like I have to put up with her because she is my husbands friends wife but her comments are starting to piss me off and I feel like I’m going to have to say something
So a man who was eyeing her up and flirting with her was about to start a fight? With whom? What exactly was getting out of hand?
Original poster
Ladyraven0483 · 30/09/2021 11:31

I can’t remember all the details we’d all had a drink

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