Is this normal man behaviour

[Amily92x]

Hi everyone.. So after a tough thought and feeling absulutely shit last night im really concidering leaving my relationship

Been married 5 years 3 kids, husband always working /out of home comes late evenings.. Soo im doing everything in the house, kids etc

I participate in all bills, shopping so money is not tight.
Yesterday i had my hands full in the evening i.e fold laundry, do laundry, shower so i asked to please can you change LO nappy, He plain blank said you do im too tired. Hes made excuses on number of occasions if i say can you brush thier teeth he fits, change clothes he moans, i hardly ever ask unless im really really tied up at that moment. Its as if im a lone parent

Is this even normal behaviour
Is this even worth fighting for my babies come 1st. Im questioning myself and the situation

What would you doo.

No it’s not normal- working full time doesn’t give you a pass on children you helped to create!

1. Not normal behaviour

1. I would leave

No it's not normal or acceptable.

My exH was the same. The main reason I left him was because I didn't want my DD growing up thinking this was ok and setting herself up for the same.

I was already basically a single parent, so freeing myself from the added tension, resentment and arguments was liberating.

Not normal, it’s arsehole behaviour my love.

There is nothing 'normal' about this. He's a lazy arse.

I'm assuming you do all his washing, cooking for both of you (and all kids) and all school prep/housework etc?

Wake up. He is taking you for a mug. I would definitely end the relationship. You're a single parent already; you just wouldn't have to look after him too.

Leave, when he has custody you will have time to spare.

He just keeps telling me my jobs to work yours is to be a mum. I mean i told him this is a very shit thing to say, more or so backwards. yes im a mother i love being one but i deserve time to me aswell. He just thinks all is my responsibility like i gave birth magically

@GiveMeAUserName123

Leave, when he has custody you will have time to spare.

Or she will be stuck with the kids all of the time because the lazy waste of space can't be arsed to have them.

If it's his job to work and your job to be Mum, who's job is it to be Dad? Sounds like you are being both parents here.

Even if it was normal, it wouldn't make it acceptable. You shouldn't suffer just because others are suffering too.

No it's not normal

I don't really subscribe to "man behaviour" being any different to "woman behaviour". He is displaying shitty person behaviour.
He should not be able to check out of family life because he goes to work and you are supposed to love being a mum!

Im just so scared to speak about his shitty behaviour to my family. Feel like a disappointment

I hope i get courage and leave. Have anyone just left, its so straining with kids involved i cant pluck the courage

Hes told me im taking making a big deal out of something so small.
To me it's not small how can you refuse to care for your kid. Simple thing as a nappy and then tell me i cant cause my feet hurt lol

I'd fire back with 'if it's so small, then why can't you do it?'

Have and get replied 'Do my job then, u wouldn't last even a minute' @Yankeescot

He's a lazy prick.
How old are the kids? Tell him you're going back to work full time and he'll need to adjust his working hours etc to facilitate yours.

There very young all under 5 so i put work on hold my youngest is 1.. They miss out so much time on him i dont want them to miss out on me aswell.. Asleep whilst he leave and comes home @girlmom21

Not normal or acceptable. I generally don't have to ask, he has eyes to see what needs doing and is a functioning adult.

No it isn’t normal behaviour. Or at least it may be common but it isn’t acceptable!

@Amily92x how long has his behaviour been like this for if you have 3 under 5?

So he thinks his job is to work working hours but yours is to work 24/7? What a prick.

As PP said, he believes it's your job to be mum. But it isn't his job to be dad, even outside of work hours?

Ugh.

Been like this from the start my pregnancies he was absent too, working.
I dont know if its a good idea to tell him family of what I want to go ahead and do..?

I suspect the problem (apart from him being a lazy misogynist) is that he has no concept of how much work it is to look after young children.

Can you go out for a day (or away for a weekend) and leave him with all the childcare?

Then you can have the conversation about whether his job is actually harder than yours...

My Mr worked long hours when kids were small, missed them some evenings and he was gutted.

He loves his kids. That's why he's my kid's dad. He would do nappies, bedtime, play, pyjamas, he wanted to. They are small for a blink of an eye. He's missing out.

But is it typical male behaviour? It seems to be. I wouldn't have had a second child if Mr had been like this to be honest.

But there might be time to change this around. I would sit him down and set it out, step up and be a fucking dad or I'm leaving. It's as much for the kids as for you. Either we do this as a partnership together or we do it separately as in different homes your choice?

Not that it matters to my advice but u said you help with bills, do you mean practically or financially?