Negative reaction from my pregnancy

[Mezzybbz]

I have just found out a few days ago I'm pregnant. I'm extremely happy about it and so is my partner (me, 20, him, 31). We decided to tell parents only, as I am currently only 3/4 weeks (unclear yet).
We told his mother first and she was really weird about the whole thing. She refused to see a positive line then when I did a digital, she said only the doctor can say it's true and I should go to make sure I'm in the "clear". And when I went doctor, she almost seemed upset it was true. I was terrified to tell anyone else because of it. I told my mother and father a day later and they were over the moon.
She fully expected my parents to drag me through the mud over it. She started asking where was the contraception when we conceived. I can't tell her we planned it. She would definitely lose it.
We even got a new car and she stressed me out so badly because she started screaming at us over one little dent. She kept saying it to me so I would give out to my partner over it. I know I'm stressing too much and I'm scared the stress will lead to miscarriage. It seems she's picking fights so she can say she doesn't support us on this baby. I don't know what to do.

What does your partner think?

Ah OP I really wouldn’t have told anyone but your partner at this point. I know it’s done now but you’ve just heaped a load of stress on yourselves. It’s very, very early, I’m surprised the doctor even saw you.

I would keep away from her for now until at she's come round to the idea, is it a new relationship? Perhaps it's a shock for her.

3 weeks? you can't possibly know for sure that it is an established pregnancy yet

she's being weird because it is so early

Is this post real? 🤔

I am wondering.

You went to a doctor when you're only 3 weeks along?

stress does not cause miscarriages

Why do you have to speak to her? Can't you just avoid her? Do you live with her?

At this point any loss would be a chemical pregnancy, surely? That’s why I’m surprised a doctor would have seen you to confirm anything.

Obv her reaction was wrong but perhaps she's suprised and handling it badly. Perhaps she assumed you'd get married etx first.
Do you live together? How long have you been?

She refused to see a positive line

She probably acted all weird because you showed her a stick that you pee’d on. What an odd thing to do.

I don't understand what you are saying about the car.

I'm also confused that you have the pregnancy confirmed this early. You must have a very different experience of trying to get to see a GP from most of the rest of the country.

Am I the only one who thinks it is weird you would be showing your pregnancy test to other people ?

@Aquamarine1029

You went to a doctor when you're only 3 weeks along?

Lots of people go to a doctor straight away when they first find out they are pregnant. It’s not common knowledge that you just self refer to see a midwife. And plenty don’t know that a doctor does not confirm your pregnancy at all (they trust you can read a pregnancy test correctly).

Seeing the doctor is not the weird part of this post.

How is she with you normally?

Im assuming you haven't been together long with there being the 11 year age gap (not judging, there's 8 years between DP&I) and you only being 20. Is it possible that she is in shock as it's so soon? She maybe never thought it would last.

Could also be the fact that you're so early at 3/4 weeks she doesn't want to get excited in case it doesn't stick (not a nice thought but after having multiple chemicals and a mc at 7 weeks it's something I think about when people have told me their news really early)

Also at 3 weeks I wouldn't imagine it was a case of her 'refusing' to see the line, but more likely it was faint?

I also don't understand how a doctor has confirmed your pregnancy to you when you think you're only 3/4 weeks. It's one thing making the appt and going without knowing about self referring to the MW but for them to actually 'confirm' anything I find very unlikely

If my 31 year old son got a 20 year old pregnant, I wouldn't be thrilled either. I would be very disappointed in his judgment, on many levels.

Of course she isn’t thrilled. There’s an 11 year age gap and you’ve only just finished being a child yourself. You’re not married and you probably haven’t been been together that long.

You’re allowed to make whatever choices you want, but she doesn’t have to be okay with them.

You shouldn’t have told anyone so early. Even when you do tell people you shouldn’t be waving around a stick you peed on.

3/4 weeks unclear? You have possibly - or possibly not- missed a period.

Why would you tell anyone this?

OP, did you take a clear blue digital pregnancy test that tells you how many weeks? If it is saying 3 weeks, that would be 5 weeks by standard calculations.

Otherwise, a normal pregnancy test wouldn't be able to pick up a pregnancy at 3 weeks (it could at 4 weeks).

Hm I have real doubts about this thread’s genuineness. But hey ho. She’s probably being weird for a few reasons : you’re only 20 and her son is 31 - that does raise a few questions about him. Also you have basically
Only just missed a period - that’s very weird to be telling people and showing pregnancy test sticks to people. Also you’re not married and maybe haven’t been together that young and at 20 that may be a bit of a red flag for longevity of the relationship sorry .

OP, are you in Ireland ? I'm Irish and recognise some of the phrases you used. 3/4 weeks is incredibly early , she may well be freaking out because it's not yet an established pregnancy.

Funny thing to plan at your age when you’ve not been together long.

Maybe she is upset that she is(poss.) going to be a Grandma? Perhaps she thinks she is too young. Or maybe she had a plan in her head that included a mortgage and marriage. Possibly she might think you are out to trap her son. Who knows.

@Aquamarine1029

If my 31 year old son got a 20 year old pregnant, I wouldn't be thrilled either. I would be very disappointed in his judgment, on many levels.

Yes I agree 100% with this!