Horrible weekend of arguing

[Mosschopz]

It’s been a horrible 48 hours. We went out Friday night for dinner (me, DH, DS (10)) and had an argument at the table (after a few drinks) in the restaurant over something and nothing then fast forward to this morning and we are arguing again and then an awful evening tonight. Tonight we went out for a walk, which turned into pre dinner drinks, which turned into dinner and more drinks out. I had about 2 pints, DH had three if it matters, then we agreed DH would supervise DS’s shower while prepared him supper. While I was doing supper, DH (who admittedly got the worse job; DS always moans about washing) started to lose his temper and shout repeatedly at DS who in turn got hysterical. It ended up with DH ‘tapping’ him which DS said had been a hit to the back of the head. He came running downstairs and said ‘what just happened?’ He was bewildered then started telling me daddy had hit me on my head. DH just minimised it, saw it as me taking sides…DS’s behaviour had been bad…he was lying about being hit…when I tackled him on it. DS didn’t want him to come up and say good night and that’s my fault too apparently. I’m so frustrated tonight I just want to leave…

Your poor son.
You both Ned to lay off the booze.

Need.

Both you and your husband sound like 12 year olds, and you're both lacking self-control. What is also clear is that you both have a problem with alcohol, so the drinking needs to stop immediately.

I won't sugarcoat this, you both need to get your shit together and stop raising your child in a war zone. Or split up, your choice, but this is ridiculous.

Booze has got to stop.

Then some open and honest chat between the two of you, not in the presence of your son.
Clear boundaries/acceptable behaviours and methods in front of and towards your son.

Explanations and apologies to your son from both of you (your DH's conduct tonight sounds utterly unacceptable and disturbing during a daily routine task?!)
More talking.
I'm sorry you sound so upset this all sounds stressful but there's clearly so much you both need to work through.
Hope you can resolve these issues swiftly...

Why drink again after the first night that went wrong ?
Why the need to drink when you're out with your son ?
Can you not drink coke etc?
Your poor son.

Hitting a child on the head it totally unacceptable and I’d be absolutely furious.

It does seem like there’s an awful lot of drinking going on and that’s contributing to a lot of disagreements.

I’d seriously consider leaving.

What a mess. Stop drinking.

Wow. You need to split up. This sounds torture.

You both appear to have a unhealthy relationship with alcohol. Your DS deserves better from his parents.

You both appear to have a unhealthy relationship with alcohol. Your DS deserves parents who puts him first.

Ugh, getting drunk at a restaurant with your child then again before dinner - do you have drink problems? This is horrible.

Sounds like your 10 year old is having a pretty shit time of it. Listening to his parents argue over dinner, then again the next day, then a bust up in which he gets ‘tapped’ on the head.
A shower for a 10 year old shouldn’t be a painful job though, surely at that age it’s a case of them sorting themselves out?
How is your relationship normally? Is this weekend unusual, or is arguing a fairly common occurrence?

Please listen to the advice you are getting here OP. Your son is in danger and you are letting it happen. Yes, you should leave and you should not drink and never ever drink in front of a child (they notice every little change in personality, temper, tone). Please, for the sake of your son.

Your poor poor child.

OP look at this from your son's perspective. He went out with his parents who got drunk and argued while he sat there listening to it, perhaps embarrassed, with no one paying any attention to him.

The next day, his parents start the morning off with an argument, get pissed and he gets a slap on the head from his drunk dad. Your son is probably acting out because of the tension at home.

Try putting your child and his needs before your own. If you're arguing when you're drunk, then stop drinking. Find ways of communicating better and start parenting your son. You'll find that his bad behaviour miraculously improves.

Totally inappropriate in front of your child. Leave the drinking for adult only occasions if you can’t drink like responsible adults who don’t argue after a few.

Grim behaviour on both your parts. Unless your child has additional needs he should be entitled to shower in private.

Why can't a 10 yo shower himself

Also, please see: www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk/

STOP DRINKING.

OP look at this from your son's perspective. He went out with his parents who got drunk and argued while he sat there listening to it, perhaps embarrassed, with no one paying any attention to him.

The next day, his parents start the morning off with an argument, get pissed and he gets a slap on the head from his drunk dad. Your son is probably acting out because of the tension at home.

This and..

STOP DRINKING.

This

You’re doing an excellent job or normalising alcohol induced shitty behaviour.

You need to take a look at yourselves.

Your poor son.

If you can't handle 2 or 3 pints each why on Earth are you drinking? Especially in the company of your child?

Bit quick to diagnose alcoholism 🙄

No-one's behaviour should be adversely affected to a significant degree by two pints. It sounds like you just loathe each other.

Your poor ds!

Stop drinking!

Two pints is not getting pissed
I don’t think the op sounds like an alcoholic either

If you’re arguing all the time though then it doesn’t sound like you’re happy in the relationship