I suspect this post won't age well but....

[HiddenSN]

....sometimes MN is a good outlet for things you don't want to say to your friends.

I went on a date at the end of 2020. Clear as day, I remember sitting across the table and thinking 'I could marry this guy'.

Not in the sense that I actually wanted to marry him. Just that, if the clock stopped and I had to choose someone I could see myself eating breakfast with every day, out of everyone I'd been on a date with recently, he'd be the one.

It was the strangest thing. I NEVER think like this. Everyone laughs at me because I'm usually such a skeptic when it comes to dating. I don't even know if I want to get married again and it's certainly not something I think about on a first date.

There was nothing that necessarily stood out between him and any other guy I'd dated. I had a great date but I don't recall any stand-out moments. It was fun but there was copious amounts of booze so that wasn't a huge surprise. I have no idea why I had that thought.

We had two more dates but they were just coffee and I don't remember having a strong feeling about them either way.

He then had to go back to his home country. I dated someone else and honestly he didn't cross my mind.

Fast forward to May and I was single again and we reconnected on a dating app.

Now coming up for 2.5 months since then and we've been dating ever since. It's by far the best dating experience I've had. I've never felt so comfortable with someone. I'm not an inherently romantic person and usually it takes a lot for me to be 'snuggly' with someone. Or if I do it (say, walking round holding hands), I feel totally ridiculous or awkward.

None of that in this case. It feels bloody fantastic. Everything just seems to work - intellectually, physically and emotionally.

Now, it's early days (and honestly, it was a toss-up between posting this and posting HELP I'M TERRIFIED OF GETTING FEELINGS FOR SOMEONE AND GETTING MY HEART BROKEN')....

But I decided to opt for this positive post in the hope I can revisit it in a year's time and smile.

Or, of course, I could be jinxing it, being utterly ridiculous or setting myself up for a huge disappointment.

But nonetheless I'm fascinated by that random fleeting thought on the first date that somehow instinctively told me there was some kind of connection there.

When we got engaged a month after our first date we both admitted we'd felt this too.

Enjoy the feeling OP and I hope it comes to fruition

I was quite anti marriage until I met my husband. We would FaceTime until 5am every night and try and get through a working day on 2 hours sleep! I knew I would marry him after the first phone call.

You never know. I was at a weekend party with my then bf of a couple of months and we all bedded down in sleeping bags on the floor and the two of us shuffled together, put our arms round each other and it felt like home.
Over 35 years ago now and it still feels the same.

It happened to me. Went on the date a bit reluctantly, in the spirit of just getting over with it. The moment I set eyes on him, I felt different. It was immediate attraction and like you, when we sat for a coffee, I looked at him and thought he could be the one.

That evening, I emailed my best friend and typed that I'd met my future husband. I was right, we married 4 years later, 9 years ago. It's lovely to read that email again. Of course, 13 years later, things are quite different and he is not half as perfect as I thought he was then :) but I'm still very happily married.

Wishing you the same story.

I told my bestie I was going to marry my new guy 2 weeks after we met.

We’ve been together 30 years so I must have been right .

Good luck!

Love these stories 💙💙💙. Good luck Op. keep us updated

I grew up on thr same street as my now husband..we played together in a group as kids.
I moved away as a teenager to live with friends.then moved back as an adult into my own home just a street away.
He had never left(still lived with his mum..which I never let him live down but if he had not we probably would not have met again)
He told me he had always fancied me as a teenager and then again when I moved back in my late 20s..and used to watch me walk past his house(which I did daily..to get to my mums)
Anyway we met in thr local pub and I just remember thinking how kind he looked and seemed..
Ten years later we have a child and he IS thr kindest man ever
I would be lost without him.
Funny to think all those years ago playing kiss chase he would be the man I ended up with!

What a lovely thread. I was married for 15 years & happy, although looking back it wasn't a great marriage. I went to an event & this man walked past me, older, totally not my type & I felt this weird pull in my stomach. I kept looking at him during the night. Nowhere near as good looking as my husband. I had never cheated.
5 years later, I'm divorced & married to the older man. I've never been happier. It's like I just knew.

I "knew" straightaway with DH. He proposed about 6 weeks after we started going out. That was in 2004.

I realised a couple of years later that he'd been the tall skinny boy with long hair that I used to fancy on the school bus. I was 15 & he was 17. When I mentioned it, he remembered exactly what I used to look like, but had been too shy to talk to me at the time.

He's not shy now. Or skinny!

@beachcitygirl

What a lovely thread. I was married for 15 years & happy, although looking back it wasn't a great marriage. I went to an event & this man walked past me, older, totally not my type & I felt this weird pull in my stomach. I kept looking at him during the night. Nowhere near as good looking as my husband. I had never cheated. 5 years later, I'm divorced & married to the older man. I've never been happier. It's like I just knew.

I'd love to know more of this story!

I had the same, OP.

Met my now DH on a night out. I had just got out of an abusive relationship and the last thing I wanted was to meet someone else. He was not my usual type at all but as soon as our eyes met I just knew he would be important in my life.
I wouldn't have even said I fancied him it was something else.

We spoke that night and he got my number through mutual friends (I had done the same!), we went on a couple of dates and I have to say there was no real spark or ripping off of clothes but rather a feeling of home or belonging.

He then went away for work for 3 months and we barely spoke over that time (exchanged the odd text) and so I assumed it was going nowhere but he called me the day he got home and we went for dinner - I was all set for telling him that we should just be friends but seeing him that night cemented that initial feeling and I don't think I really went home from his flat after that

That was 16 years ago. We got married after two years and now have 2 DC.

What a lovely thread. My DPs married within 6 weeks of meeting each other. 45 years on, with many highs and lows and some great adventures, they are still madly in love.

After only two dates I went home and told my mum this is the man I am going to marry. I didn't really feel I was instantly in love with him, just that I had no choice it was just meant to be him. He told me later that he felt the same after our first date and we have now been married for over 30 years.

I had a similar process with my now husband. Went home for Christmas ( relationship status 2 months!) was thinking what would I say if he asked me to marry him ( never worried about this before) hmmmm yes! Was engaged by new year.

Previous relationships didn't normally last past 3 months 😁 now married 16 years....

I knew I was going to marry DH when we got into a terrible row during the third date, resolved it, and went out for drinks afterwards. I am a shouter and really argumentative (not abusive but loud as it was how I was raised) and men either get scared of it or abusive. The guys who argue without effing and blinding until we can draw a line under the issue are few and far between.

Aah, OP. you're happy! Lovely thread, indeed, some wonderful responses on here.
I remember being on a tube, in London, and just KNOWING I was in love and wanting to spend all of my life with him, 34 years later, we are still in love and happy.
Good luck to you, you will be in my thoughts.

I was 23 and separated for a year from my H who had been very very cruel to me. I remember telling my friend that I just wanted to meet someone who was "kind and gentle".
I was in a club (we used to call them disco's, yes I'm that old!) being persued by a bloke who was a bit odd and becoming a bit of a stalker, when I saw this bloke looking at me and I thought "He looks a nice kind bloke" so I asked him if I could pretend to be with him so this other bloke would leave me alone.
We celebrated our 44th wedding anniversary last week, and he's still the nicest kindest person I know.

I'd known now-DH as a friend for a while. When we eventually got around to going on a date, by the end of the evening we both knew. I asked him how long he thought he could put up with me for, he asked if the rest of our lives would do... and that was it. Married over 30 years now.

One thing I'd say is access your future if your DP's home country is not the same as your own. I only mean this incase you have kids together and then spilt. Obviously this might not be relevant in terms of age / what area he is from.

DH said as soon as he saw me in the library of the dept we both worked in he knew I was the one for him. He hadn’t even spoken to me. I on the other hand was dating someone else so he waited patiently. What is weird is he used to run around as a toddler shouting my name, it’s an English very old fashioned name that my family use as well as my Chinese name. His Mum is hugely woo and told me about it. So as soon as he told her my name she lost the plot.

As soon as I agreed to date him I knew he was for me, I had known him as a friend for just over two years. I was actually scared of dating him as I have quite an unattached style romantically and need a lot of space so it freaked me out a bit.

Great thread

How lovely

I had the same with dh. We were both quite young (mid twenties) but it just seemed to fit somehow. No games, no second guessing,

My Dh always says he felt like that about me. I took a bit more persuading but here we are 19 years of marriage later.
I hope you can look back fondly at this in a year's time!

I met DH when I was 29 after choosing some absolute knackers in my 20s. I was wary because I had a gut reaction to him that he was very attractive- not usually a good indication for me of a trustworthy man. He told me a week later on our 3rd date that he knew we were going to get married. I shut him up it scared me so much- any mention of commitment from a man was usually a prelude to them cheating, backing off, starting to lie. I turned him down twice over the next 8 months (I wanted to say yes but didn't trust my judgement). I said yes the 3rd time and we've been married 11 years.
I'm sitting here on my phone with a glass of wine and he's playing football with our 3 DC 6, 4 and 2 on the lawn outside our holiday cottage. He was just the right person for me. Love him to bits.

I called my sister the day after my first date with my husband and told her I was going to marry him. I just knew.