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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

DF blaming himself

4 replies

unknown12345678 · 26/07/2021 16:17

I've had to nc

My DF was meant to be going somewhere this wkend as part of his hobby but didn't go as he was feeling too tired

One of his friends has had a bad fall during the hobby and has had to have an operation. He's been told that there's only a 5% chance he'll be able to walk again

My DF texted me to let me know as I also know the guy too but nowhere near as well. My DF sent me two long texts, he normally only sends very short ones and he's blaming himself. He's basically saying that if he had gone it wouldn't have happened

My DF is quite set in his ways and sometimes doesn't take opinions very well. I'm not sure what to tell him. I think it's quite common to think "what if" but nothing like this has happened before

I'm not sure whether to try and reason with him and try and make him feel better?

I'm thinking of contacting the football club that the injured man supports as it might really lift his spirits if they send him a card etc. He's a huge fan

OP posts:
Nicolastuffedone · 26/07/2021 17:17

Why wouldn’t it have happened if he’d been there??

WoohooIAmGoingToAGig · 26/07/2021 17:39

Nice that he's managed to make it all about him...

How would it have not happened if he had been there? Surely falls are accidental.

GiveMeAUserName123 · 26/07/2021 17:43

No one knows it wouldn’t have happened if he was there, because he wasn’t there.

It’s ok if he feels sorry for his friends bad news, but to feel guilty about an accident isn’t really, that’s why it’s called an accident.

OverweightPidgeon · 26/07/2021 17:46

Ask him how he would have prevented it happening .

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