I'm new here but I could do with some advice.
I have 3 boys with my ex (18,18 and 14). I've been with my ‘D’P for 4 years, he moved in when we found out I was pregnant in January 2018 at the time we'd been together for a year. He was lovely the whole pregnancy, and I gave birth in October 2018 to his first child but my 4th boy. He was lovely for a bit afterwards but then he started acting different (always wanted us to have sex even though I hadn't long gave birth, was a bit controlling, we argued more etc). I then found a little bag of cocaine which was obviously his, baby was about a month old at this point. He denied it and said it was his brothers, but I told him to leave which he did and we had a break. He did come to see baby often though. I then found out I was pregnant again. But I didn't tell him for a while, after Christmas, we talked and I told him I was pregnant and I decided to give him another chance as long as he got help and didn't bring drugs into the house. He agreed and he was lovely again.
I gave birth to DD in August 2019, and things were great for a while. He did occasionally ask for sex which I refused sometimes but he was fine with it.
I did look after my ex’s baby, as he was about 6 months older than DS4 and my ex has full custody of him. But my partner was always fine with it.
In about March of this year, we started arguing a lot more again and he used to wake the younger 2 up with his shouting. Recently, he's also been saying how he wants another baby, which I don't want as I'm happy with the children I have and there's no room. My elder 2 share, DS3 has his own (very small) room, DS4 sleeps in our bed and DD sleeps in our room in her cot. He always says to put DS4 in with DS3 which I don't think is very fair as his room is tiny as it is and I know he wouldn't like sharing with his younger brother!
He's also said that DS1 and DS2 need to move out as they're adults and they're taking up the bigger room and DS4 and DD could share that room.
Last night, he asked for sex and I said no as DS4 was in our bed, he then told me to ask Ds1&2 to watch him for a bit. I said no as I was also tired and he went downstairs and seemed very annoyed, I followed him and asked him why he was annoyed and he said because I don't want to have sex with him, I told him im tired, he then accused me of having an affair with my ex!
I'm obviously not, I do look after his son for him occasionally if he's working and he's not at nursery but I have no idea why my partner thinks we're having an affair.