The One Where Geller Proves He Is As Useful As A Chocolate Teapot

[StuckInPollyannaMode]

Hear that ticking my lovelies?

Tick

Tock

Tick

Tock

That’s the sound of the bomb I have just thrown over the metaphorical trench edge at Geller. Here’s the previous thread if you need to catch up. As ever, thank you for the support and the cheering and the banter and for giving me fresh perspectives.

I am fucking DONE. Done with this. I need to stand up and fight for the girls. He is NEVER going to do what he needs to for them.

So I picked them up from school and they were quiet but ok. We’ve had pizza in our pjs and they’re asleep. I have had a barrage of questions about who I have seen this weekend and what I’ve been doing and why am I wearing new clothes and do I have new friends and am I working as much as I should be etc etc. Clearly fed by him, they’ve never done that before.

Then I get this (he hadn’t responded to my previous message at all)

How is DD1?

We can talk albeit I have very little time in the next few days. Strangely someone praised me this weekend for how well I dealt with one of her meltdowns. She really struggled with the homework. Together we bought various materials while DD2 was having her hair cut. But of course when she made it, it didn’t go well. However she and I did it together first thing Sunday before DD2 woke and she did it brilliantly.

It was DD1 that led our walk while DD2 was a pain and tried to stop us going, finally relenting after the first field.

Both of them played brilliantly with the boys over the other side of the fence. But it’s the usual challenge of when they are on their own in a small space. It’s simply a very intense thing single parenting. And I can’t break DD1 on sleeping alone and I’m not prepared for it to become tears and anger. As I say she ended up watching the football and was engrossed.

So I said

I also have very little time. So I’ll leave it to you to figure it out.

She is in bed, asleep, with clean hair. They have both been quiet and we have talked about zero tolerance for violence, shouting and arguing. and what that means and the importance of kind words and being gentle and how to act when you’re angry and that you need to be mindful of the words that come out of your mouth as they can upset people. I repeat, next week I will email to discuss the shape of the next school year as it sounds like the current arrangement isn't working for the girls if they are that short of sleep and upset at the start of the school week. The girls need you in their life but it needs to come at a lower emotional cost for them and for me.

I would like to make you aware the level of messaging is unwelcome, and that I am looking to address this and agree on appropriate levels of communication moving forward.

I await the nuclear explosion which will no doubt follow.

I. Am. Done.

@StuckInPollyannaMode

Hello my lovelies

It's all going on - children home from school, Covid tests (negative thankfully), huge work week, obviously. Hence delay in posting.

Geller is Up To Something.

He is being all smug and self-congratulatory laughing and sneering at me ever so slightly. Either:

a) he's written what he thinks is a get one up on Polly letter via his solicitor or
b) he's somehow found out about DI Dishy and thinks he's got me once and for all or
c) someone has finally told him to wind his neck in and he's taking their advice or
d) he's managed to find some poor individual to take him on and cosset him in his hour of need.

Answers on a postcard.

In other news, super lovely weekend. Just one problem. I may have had too much sauvignon blanc on Saturday night and told DI Dishy I was falling for him.

He's not in the same space. He's asked for some time to think.

We watched the football together and had another lovely evening and lots of super shagging (note to self, shagging on a pool table gives you horrendous bruising) and I am pleased that he doesn't feel the need to give me the answer I wanted to hear but also confused and he was sad and...well. Fuck knows.

I'm seeing him on Friday night. I've got tickets to a really fun sounding film evening. But he's gone all quiet. I have a really busy week and I'm actually taking the day off on Friday to just chill out a bit as the work pressure is getting to me. I've yoga and a manicure booked, and I'm going to go for a nice walk. Just have a bit of time to myself ahead of what may be the inevitable.

And Friday is the last time I'll see him for ten days as then I'm off with the kids to see family.

Make or break, eh? Not sure which way is up. But when a friend told me Monday that DI Dishy was clearly making me very happy and I'd got my old spark back, my answer was that I was finally happy in myself and he just happened to be a side benefit.

Not sure if that's progress.

And I keep forgetting to buy wet wipes.

My answer is:

E) Who gives a fuck. He can think whatever he likes and hatch whatever ridiculous 'plot' his little pea brain can come up with. Remember "the dog barks but the caravan passes on". And your caravan is leaving that particular dog choking on its dust.

Take it one day at a time. You're doing well.

Well that’s it. It’s over with DI Dishy.

Middle of the biggest work day I’ve had in years and he dumps me via WhatsApp

Classy.

I’m not replying. What is there to say.

Oh God Polly. What a wankbadger. I'm so sorry x

Fucking twat. Who dumps by text?!

At least you know there’s good sex to be had and have got back in the saddle so to speak.

Big ((hugs))

I’m sorry @StuckInPollyannaMode. DI Drippy is a coward.
Gellar is probably smug because he found 5p on the footpath.

Nothing to say. I’m so sorry. I hope you can compartmentalise enough to get through the work day relatively unscathed.

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you get through work ok.

Oh so sorry to read that @StuckInPollyannaMode Sadly, it is a risk with rebound affairs ... awful to have to go through.

Sorry to hear that Polly, sounds like he just isn’t in the same place as you so got cold feet. I know you’ll be cut up about it, but you’re so much stronger than you were.
Positives you can take away - somebody really dishy fancied you so you must be pretty hot, and sex can be great, so the future is looking pretty bright.

You're right not to reply. Best thing is to shrug your shoulders, think 'well it was fun whilst it lasted', and relegate him to the junk box in your mental attic.

More fish in the sea than ever came out of it.

I'm very disappointed by 'DI Dishy but not Nice', I expected more from him.

I know you both went into this as a FWB and you have later declared feelings but even FWBs treat each other with respect and I don't think a phone call would have gone amiss.

A text in the middle of a work day shows a complete lack of respect.

Remember that right now it hurts like hell and will probably hurt even more than when you left your marriage but you will get through this, cry and shout if you need to but never forget you are free from a controlling husband and your life is your own💕

That’s a shitty thing to do. But, remember, it was never going to be the love affair of the century. You are on the rebound (whether you like it or not) and rebound relationships are rarely happily ever afters.

You had fun, you remembered what good sex was, he got you through some tough times. Now it is time to move on.

And, for what it’s worth, I agree with you - his message isn’t worth replying to.

Good call don't dignify with a reply.

What a wimpy way to behave.

I'm embarrassed for him🙄.

His loss Polly.

Oh, I’m not replying, don’t worry. And I’m not in floods of tears (well, I was, but they lasted less than 5 minutes)

What I am is absolutely fucking furious. What a lack of respect for me. After all the support I’ve given him.

I’m not even swearing off men for a bit. I’ve had some great sex, some good times, abs I’ve seen what it can be. I am not lowering my standards nor my expectations. I will focus on me and the girls and move forward positively.

Now, more to the point, any of you near Bristol and fancy a fabulous night out on Friday? I’m damned if I let these tickets go to waste and they’re none refundable. I’d love to take one of you.

I am on the other side of the planet, but I would definitely go out for cocktails and laughs with you @StuckInPollyannaMode. You’re all class!

Stick it up on your WhatsApp groups of favourite women and see if one of your pals can make it.

Damn far too far for me too

What a jerk he is, no wonder he was single!

Sorry for the knock back, its not good for your self esteem. But hopefully short lived disappointment
I would love to join you in Bristol, (former home) but live over the water.

The 5p on the pavement made me laugh !😂

So he is more toad than prince after all (sorry if he hurt you!)

Do look at what your kisses made of him for a while.
Remember what power they had.

(5 mins of a strong woman's tears are more than he deserves after a text message ending. )

All good wishes for that great night out. (Wish I could come!)
Enjoy the freedom and all that you have learnt since leaving Geller.

Sod DI Dishy. WhatsApp, honestly that's only one step up from a post it note.

When you asked about relationships with coppers, I didn't answer Polly because I didn't want to rain on your parade, but they don't have a great reputation in the fidelity stakes, obviously not all policemen are philanderers, but my family member was and I've known a few others who were too. Just my experience, but long-term you might be better off out of this relationship now, before you got more involved.

For the time being a rampant rabbit is your friend. 😉

I miss Bristol but sadly I’m in London on Friday

On the positive he served a purpose, got you back in the saddle and you enjoyed it!

He had his uses.😚

I agree with the poster who said he was always going to be a rebound guy.

You have finally gotten a bit of freedom after 10 long hard years of Geller.

You deserve a couple of laps around the track enjoying yourself before you even consider what you want in a new relationship.

It takes time to process what you have gone through.

Get your divorce sorted and take a breath.

You will meet someone, give yourself a chance to process, grow, accept that your relationship with your mum has impacted you and figure out how you are going to avoid the Geller's of this world going forward.

What a rat!
I vote a) that Geller has thought up a stunning put down and sent it to his solicitor.
The solicitor is sensible and you will never see it.

Ahh Polly that sucks! Sure you'll find someone to go with you on Friday, sadly too far away! Onwards and upwards, he served the purpose of helping you find your inner goddess again. Worth it for that.