The last 6 years me and my partner have been ttc, I was told I had unexplained infertility and this year we had ivf. The first transfer failed. We're about to do another. I'm feeling fed up with my partner. He smokes and smokes weed. When we started ivf I had to beg him to stop smoking incase we got tested and he did the last week before our appointment... he stopped weed whilst we had ivf. After the failed cycle he's smoking like a chimney and is back to smoking weed... about a week before we started ivf I found he had messaged girls on Snapchat and got pictures of them and even said he was single.... absolutely lost my shit, but then I thought but what happens if this is my only chance to have a baby... he told me the reason for this was that I was constantly nagging him to stop smoking etc (even though it was for OUR potential baby).... he's shit with his money and I don't know how... he gets about 1800 a month to 2000 after tax and I make 1400... I ALWAYS have a float in my bank and have on many occasions helped him. Last month our cat cost us 500 and I paid and said you owe me half and for the last month's food shop... 400 in total... not paid me, says he's skint and needs to do overtime... I had a bad night's sleep last night, was awake from 1 till 4. He was up for about an hour an half... this morning I've gone to work and HE has called in sick coz he's tired... he got me a card this morning for my birthday which he wrote this morning, nothing else.
Sorry for the rant and it probably won't make sense when people read. I'm pissed off. It's my birthday and he is off work coz he's tired... how can we have a baby and pay bills if a baby keeps him awake at night... he can't save for shit. I'm fed up with him I think but feel stuck