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Relationships

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OLD - let's swipe together

14 replies

fedupwiththeguy · 31/05/2021 06:15

I thought that it would be fun, and also helpful to me. Sometimes I don't know what to make of some profiles.

Let's go with these two, what do you think?

"Mr. Ready to settle down": My friends would describe me as assertive, intelligent, caring and dedicated. Please don't message me if you are fat, tall, "independent" or unstable. 😯

Mr. Serial Killer: not interested in committing murder. Test assured that the evening will end with you back at home safe and sound.

OP posts:
Maydaybankholiday · 31/05/2021 22:18

Ermm I hate them both!!
The fat comment?!!!
The second one is trying to be funny and quirky but sounds creepy actually.

Dogoodfeelgood · 31/05/2021 22:20

Prefer the serial killer definitely Grin

CrapAtThis · 31/05/2021 22:26

Serial killer guy sounds really funny! Right swipe.

I always left swipe those who have a list of physical requirements, regardless of whether I match those requirements or not.

Lockheart · 31/05/2021 23:27

Oh I had a good one tonight.

First picture, normal looking, says he's serious and genuine.

Second picture, just text. "Open minded? Fancy entertaining my kinks? £200"

Mermaidwaves · 31/05/2021 23:32

Yuck this reminds me why I gave up OLD, especially the first one. Doesn't want fat, tall and independent? That's me out then! Oh I shall weep tonight Grin You're very brave OP I wish you luck though.

Opentooffers · 01/06/2021 00:03

First one is short and intimidated by independent women. Wants someone to see him as beez knees, though you may have to be on your knees to be the right height for himGrin

MrsPolski · 01/06/2021 00:04

The first was going well until the last sentence 🤦‍♀️ Important to read until the end!

When you use the word murder more than once in your profile you sound creepy but he was lucky I like murder movies... swiped right and let's see if he talks more murder haha

@Lockheart OLD is like winning the lottery

I still remember a screenshot that my friend sent me of a guy's profile. He was in a tub full of bubbles with pout, but he looked sooooo ridiculous that we laughed for days after that

Opentooffers · 01/06/2021 00:08

Tbf, a lot of pics are not a fair representation, so stipulating a particular body type is fair enough - not interested in fat men either.

B1rdflyinghigh · 01/06/2021 00:44

Im not looking for anyone that smokes or snores. - I guess that's the majority of the population out regards snoring. In bold JESUS IF YOU AINT GOING TO TALK WHY BOTHER SERIOUSLY...then an angry face!

Please don't judge me by my exterior and couldnt give a shit attitude.

Looking for someone to cook, clean and clean my underpants while Im fishing all the time. - Slightly tongue in cheek...but seriously. and Im laid back!

I can't be doing with lots of texts, so lets meet.

Im not going to marry you as Im the one you meet before the one.

My fav profile of all time. I screenshot this one:

I have Disney Plus, netflix as well as sky. Ive had my first covid vaccine. Dont mind someone that's married. John was edging his bets! He wasn't a looker.

South Yorkshire is not a good place to date!

Duckypoohs · 01/06/2021 00:59

I remember one with the username cynicaluser, he seemed like an edge lord in his profile. I mean really...

Duckypoohs · 01/06/2021 01:01

It's Disneyland for these cunts. All the newly single naive women who get sucked in and mangled out

welliesarefuntowear · 01/06/2021 06:25

The last genius I spoke to online sent me a dick pic. I could see his left hand also. Of course he was wearing a wedding ring 😡

KirstenBlest · 01/06/2021 10:14

@welliesarefuntowear, tthat's gross Grin

PriestessofPing · 01/06/2021 10:39

What’s the “independent” dig about I wonder? Is that some sort of code for some unattractive quality or does he really not like women who are independent.

If you put a gun to my head i’d go with the serial killer since he’s at least trying to be funny rather than outright insulting. Can you imagine the types of women who would mentally go ‘ohhh am I short enough? thin enough?’ etc and actually swipe right? So yea mr not that funny but at least he tried serial killer. Unless it’s a double bluff.

Confused Grin

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