He doesn’t seem really bothered about his son?

[Amz210]

So I read a thread just now that prompted me to get some advice about my situation.

I’ve been seeing this man from September, we met online and clicked straight away. Honestly it’s like I fell head over heels in love and him the same. He had a six month old baby with a woman who was a one night stand. She lives a few hours away, when I met him he would always talk about his son, how he never had his dad in his life, how he needs it to be different.

He seemed really passionate about his son, and would go and fetch the baby, and spend a few days with him and take him back. We’ve spoken about moving to be closer to his son, the babies mum doesn’t know about me yet because he thinks she will stop him from seeing him. And he told me he can’t deal with that. It is something that needs to be done because we’ve spoken about us having our own child together.

Recently though I’ve really thought he only sees his son around onc a month, maybe for a few days at a time but he lost his job. And still only sees him that often. Also when he has his son we don’t see each other and he will often call me and the baby isn’t with him. He SEEMS like he really loves his child, he did say he wishes he had him with me instead. But is this normal? Am I setting myself up for failure

@Amz210 I'm sorry but of course he's amazing to you, this is the start of the relationship.
But look properly and I bet you can see the red flags.
Sounds like the type to blame everyone and not take responsibility.
You sure he doesn't have the child because his parent want to see him and your dp wants to look like a good parent.

I would also be concerned about the ons, I've known a few men use that even my ex acts as if we weren't together for 3 years, in fact he doesn't tell his new gf's he has our son, just the first one he had. & his family back up the lie

I was wondering if he actually had a baby because it is a good excuse to disappear for days at a time with no more justification needed. I was wondering if he had another girlfriend/wife/is still with the ex and OP is just his ‘bit on the side’. Sorry OP.

I’m not sure why a woman would even be interested in a man with a small baby, it’s surely the sort of thing that would send most women running for the hills. He should be focusing on his child and on getting a job, not on a new relationship,

Dear goodness.