Hi I know not everyone is a narc. I've seperated from one recently. He would do things like.
Make out i was confusing.
Say I didn't make sense in messages. (Nobody else has struggled with me)
Tell me I would make him laugh with how I was.
Made comments on my hair and stuff to suggest what he preferred instead.
Obsessed with sex.
Was also messaging another woman or two.
Sometimes would agree to let me ring at a certain time then not answer and fall asleep.
He lacked empathy and didn't seem to understand my feelings.
Seemed to have broken relationships around him.
Started with little lies.
Since splitting I've found out alot more about him.
He's actually awful when you scratch the surface.
Sorry to drone on about myself. But I want to explain just incase that your gut feelings are usually right. They are almost your psychic senses.
If you know something is off. Believe it. I've been in healthy relationships and they make you feel happy and relaxed and secure. When you are in a dodgy relationship you feel anxious. Irritated. Insecure and stressed.
Write a list. Good and bad points. Think about what you see and what they mean.
Ask yourself what you want from a relationship and if he is giving it.
If he is lying about other ladies he will continue that pattern. Sadly they don't change usually if they like window shopping. A normal loyal partner doesn't make their partner feel like rubbish.
Now I've got away from being emotionally abused I feel alot better in many ways. For example I sleep better. I feel lighter. The stress has lifted. I am no longer on edge. But I am still working on myself. I have upset days and still am figuring out how it happened. I often think why me?
But what I regret is not listening to my gut. I put myself through so much misery hoping it would get better because he loved me.
Hope some of this makes sense. A relationship should be balanced and equal in everyway. X