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Original poster

DH suffering from Anxiety/Headaches – Don’t know how to help anymore

56 replies

plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 16:37

Sorry this is long, hope it's ok to post here.

DH is diagnosed with generalised anxiety disorder and depression & has suffered since his late teens – he’s now 41. He also has daily tension headaches (everyday!) – Dr has been seen about this, he’s had an MRI scan which was all clear, had his eyes tested etc. After some online research I suggested Amitriptyline to the Dr for which he was prescribed but these didn’t help either. He’s tried Syndol, Ibuprofen etc but nothing touches the headaches. He was prescribed Diazophram for flying and I think they did help, but obviously that’s not a sensible or permanent solution.

He suffers so bad with the headaches that he often can’t sleep. This also results in him self-medicating with alcohol, as it’s the only time he gets some relief from the pain :( but as we all know… alcohol is a depressant so this just leaves him feeling worse for days afterwards & usually results in huge arguments between us.

He had been on Citalopram for the past 2 or so years (he’s been on it previously as well in the past for years which helped his Anxiety) but decided it wasn’t doing anything for him anymore, apart from helping him with some night terrors, so he’s decided to gradually take himself off it.

Along with this he also has ongoing issues with his digestion & just feels really crappy in general every day. This isn’t helped with him having a manual labour job which makes him feel worse. His self-esteem is rock bottom too which I truly believe would be improved if he didn’t feel so bad all the time.

On top of all this I’m currently 6 months pregnant.. I just want him to be feeling ok, especially with a baby on the way. He’s the loveliest, kindest man. I just want to see him happy and not in pain anymore. I feel so useless.

Has anyone been through something similar? I’m wondering if it’s all related to his diet, but there’s no proven research on that. I’ve looked at going private and seeing a headache specialist – I think if the headaches went then his Anxiety wouldn’t be so bad, but this is very expensive and he doesn’t want any money to be spent on him as he says it will just make his anxiety worse. Also I’m guessing a Dr will just try him with various other medications too which usually make you feel worse rather than better. I’ve also been looking at Chiropractors/Osteopaths as maybe it’s related to his neck/back… help :(

OP posts:
PragmaticWench · 30/04/2021 16:42

This is quite left field but has he been checked for coeliac/ulcerative colitis etc? I'm asking as anxiety, depression, mood and digestive issues can be symptoms of these. There is a link between gut function and the brain.

silentlight · 30/04/2021 16:48

Could he actually be suffering from migraine/cluster headaches? He could try sumatriptan which is very good for clearing this type of headache. But it’s prob best to lay of the booze so a hangover isn’t getting mixed up with a migraine.

I have an anxiety disorder and also get stress related migraines. The sumatriptan helps me a lot, it’s almost like a reset for my brain. Tracking my headaches, triggers and mood on an app called Migraine Buddy has really helped me too.

Original poster
plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 16:49

@PragmaticWench
yes forgot to say, he's had a Gluten intolerence blood test at the docs but this came back negative. Though the Dr did suggest we just try and cut out Gluten anyway as the tests aren't always accurate, but he's a VERY fussy eater so we haven't managed to try this properly.
Wondering if there's a better test for this instead?

OP posts:
Original poster
plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 16:53

@silentlight
Thanks for the suggestion, I've not heard of that. We are pretty sure they are tension headaches though as he has them all the time, wakes up with it, has it all day and goes to sleep with it

OP posts:
PragmaticWench · 30/04/2021 17:18

Yes, gluten intolerance tests are not very accurate but coeliac blood tests are, so that's worth investigating. Ulcerative colitis and other gut issues can be harder to pinpoint but I'd be pushing to rule those out.

pointythings · 30/04/2021 17:21

In the long term he should probably look at referral to a pain clinic if all other options have been explored. It takes a lot of time and endurance to push through the system though - I wish you both well.

toadstool32 · 30/04/2021 17:24

As a fellow headache sufferer, have you considered medication headaches? Ditch the painkillers. It'll be hell on earth for a few days but they can definitely make things worse

romdowa · 30/04/2021 17:27

He could definitely be getting rebound headaches from the medication and alcohol.

Anonapuss · 30/04/2021 17:27

Another left field suggestion...
I also suffer with dreadful anxiety - but mines situational and things trigger it.
Ive been suggested botox for my jaw as i find i tense my jaw and this causes dreadful all day all night headaches.
Apparently they can inject the jaw muscle, and some others, to stop the over tensing that causes tension headaches and saw jaw. I particularly get it bad on waking, as i tense in my sleep.
Worth a google maybe.

Much like your husband, no drugs work for me.

niceupthedance · 30/04/2021 17:31

Is he very bendy? Hyper mobility syndrome can cause headaches and gut problems

silentlight · 30/04/2021 17:32

Migraine buddy can help track tension headaches too. Interestingly I have a gluten intolerance and a dairy one too. The trigger tracking in the app really has helped me and now I know my triggers are lack of sleep, red wine, beer, cheese, gluten and stress.

I think it’s going to be hard to track triggers if he has the headache all the time, so somehow that needs to be reset to no headache and start from scratch.

I don’t think you can mix sumatriptan with an ssri like citalopram though. And I think headaches can be a withdrawal symptom of an ssri too?

silentlight · 30/04/2021 17:33

Oh and as others have said, rebound headache from medication is also an issue for me! So tracking what tablets I have taken has also helped me cut down.

Mumof1andacat · 30/04/2021 17:48

I worked within child psychology for some time. We had lots of referrals for patients suffering headaches mainly due to anxiety. Our psychologists worked out plans to help manage the pain, work out triggers, relaxation techniques and using the time to talk about what might be causing the anxiety. Has had looked at talking therapy or been referred for anything like that?

Claire347 · 30/04/2021 17:49

Has he spoke to his GP about trying Trazodone? Most of the antiperspirants in the SSRI family sertraline etc. Can cause insomnia however apparently bupropion is the best for sleep.

Have you thought about the tension headaches being caused by the anxiety, depression and lack of sleep?

Also the majority of antidepressants take 4-6 weeks to get into your body so he really has to try his best to push through any initial side affects and give them time to work (I know it’s easier said than done).

If he’s having trouble getting to sleep he could try listening to some sleep meditation/hypnosis with his earphones at night there’s loads of it free on YouTube so nothing to lose with that one.

Xx

Mintlegs · 30/04/2021 17:54

Some good suggestions on here already. Does he have regular fizzy drinks if so which ones? How tall is he and what is his posture like?

EarthSight · 30/04/2021 18:05

Has he seen a neurologist? If you haven't, insist on it. He really needs specialised care at this point. There's probably a serious issue with his serotonin levels which needs to be looked at. Triptans, which is a different type of medicine they use for migraines, might not be enough and shouldn't be used every day.

I'm not sure what kind of headaches he has, but it might be worth asking the neurologist about Botox (which they sometimes use with varying success) and this new device -

www.england.nhs.uk/2021/04/nhs-rolls-out-headache-busting-gadget-across-the-country/

Original poster
plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 18:35

Thank you for all these suggestions! Definitely lots more research I can do at least :)

To answer a few points - He’s been on anxiety medication for years and off it for long periods too, during all those times he’s had the same headaches so I don’t think it’s a side effect of being on/off the anxiety medication. He was on citalopram years ago and it really helped him get out of a depressive period but I think he’s just got too used to it and it doesn’t work for him anymore. He’s tried other medication too (sertraline etc) past the 4-6 weeks period and it didn’t work for him

He’s also had periods of not drinking at all and still had the headaches

He’s been referred to talking therapy and CBT but neither have really helped and only make the anxiety worse as he’s always thinking about going Sad

OP posts:
Original poster
plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 18:37

@Mintlegs
No he doesn’t really drink fizzy drinks, mainly water and squash and only one instant coffee in the morning. He’s about average height at 5’10 with a fine posture from what I can see!

OP posts:
Original poster
plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 18:39

@Anonapuss
I have heard him grinding his teeth in the night so it could definitely be a jaw/teeth issue too

OP posts:
TheSandgroper · 30/04/2021 18:41

As @silentlight mentioned above, food can often be a trigger. The examples given above are all examples of amines and are very common causes.

www.fedup.com.au/factsheets/symptom-factsheets/headaches-and-migraines

NeverDropYourMoonCup · 30/04/2021 18:43

He's 'self medicating with alcohol', complains of headaches, anxiety and stomach issues.

That sounds like an alcoholic with permanent dehydration/a hangover justifying why they're drinking every day.

However, if it's blood pressure related, a beta blocker - Propranolol - might be more useful in reducing symptoms. And if he's drinking on the quiet, it's not dangerous in the way that antidepressants or tranquilisers would be.

Original poster
plantgirl4 · 30/04/2021 18:50

@NeverDropYourMoonCup
He doesn’t drink everyday. He just drinks at the weekend on a Friday and Saturday usually.

OP posts:
Quaverscrisps · 30/04/2021 19:01

Get him to try plant based diet. Even if it's not food intolerance and just stress he will still benefit. I get tension headaches they are horrible but mine are always in back of neck and hot water bottle sorts it. Prescription of plant based, exercise and meditation/ mindfulness. X

LittlestBoho · 30/04/2021 19:01

If he eats a very restricted diet it could be linked to his gut microbiome. Lots of studies are showing links between unhealth gut bacteria and depression / anxiety. Is his diet restricted in a chicken nugget and oven chips way? He won't be eating the right food to nourish his good bacteria so bad bacteria will be thriving. Dr Michael Mosely has a good book called The Clever Guts Diet about why a healthy gut microbiome is important and how to build one up.

Also, a bit left field (and sadly illegal) would he consider microdosing? It's taking a tiny amount of LSD / psycobilin on a 1 day on, 2 days off schedule. It helps with depression and anxiety. Psycobilin has been shown to be one of the most effective cures for cluster headaches. They're also non habit forming and don't have the adverse side effects of the usual SSRIs.