have just finished breastfeeding, got period back, and, delighted to say, my sex drive seems to have returned. however, with it a whole host of confusing emotions.
i seem to have a renewed crush on my ex-boyfriend, who is also my best friend. and i keep panicking ive done the wrong thing having a baby with my current partner. i basically saw them both for 5 years, in an open and honest relationship, and then me and my current partner wanted a baby, i had lost sexual interest in the now ex., although i still loved him deeply (and always have). we had a remarkably amicable breakup, although he has taken a while to move on, about 2 years really. he's finally fallen for someone else, who's nice enough. they are also in an open relationship.
and now i have a whole lot of renewed confusion. me and the ex have snogged a couple of times on nights out. i've told my current partner about that and he's fine, but don't know if he would be okay with anything else happening.
but what all this waffle really is, is how REAL are these feelings? could this just be the confusion of hormones returning (i do feel positively teenage!). i totally accept it could be panicking about him moving on as he's now fallen for this new girlfriend. even more than mucking myself about, i don't want to hurt my lovely ex or my lovely family. me and my dp do still have an open relationship of sorts, but its not so established as it was, and seeing as we only managed penetrative sex again last week (childbirth injuries and loss of libido)think we have to take it all slowly.
did anyone else get a crazy unexpected surge of complex emotions after stopping breastfeeding?