A younger guy at work - would appreciate your thoughts!

[Cupcake00]

I have been in my current role almost 2 years. There is a guy within our team who has always been friendly and we have always got along. We clicked straight away. We all do as a team. He is a bit of a joker, keeps spirits high, a bit of a cheeky chappy really. A couple of the staff have commented how he likes to do anything he can to help me. I have definitely noticed he is slightly flirtatious but that was about all. I never gave it a 2nd thought as he is alot younger with a girlfriend.
Fast forward - he is no longer with his girlfriend (split last October). He is still his still the same character, however, he has asked me out on a date. I brushed it off as a bit of a joke bringing up the age difference (13 years). However, we started to chat outside of work and he is lovely. I started to forget about his age. Nothing has happened. We have gone on a few walks with our dogs.
He just keeps telling me that he doesn't see anything wrong with the age difference. However, wants me to feel comfortable. I have mentioned I'm concerned as I dont want to spoil our working relationship. He understands and again doesn't want me to feel uncomfortable. However, I enjoy his company. He's kind, I don't feel pressured.
Nobody knows we have been in contact outside of work. However, someone has approached me, telling me I have an admirer and said I should be aware and commented on his age. I felt embarrassed and brushed it off.
I have mentioned it to him. He has said he would like to continue chatting meeting but only if I'm comfortable. He isn't concerned about what people think.
I don't know if I'm doing the right thing.
He's so much younger.
We work together.
The comment today, I feel that I would be judged.
Am I not thinking clearly because I have enjoyed his company/attention. I have dated previous and know how difficult it is to find someone you click with.
He wants to go for a picnic next weekend. I want to but feel a little worried.
Can this even work anyway. I'm not sure if we are on the same path.
Anyone got any thoughts on this, would appreciate it.

How old are both of you?

Don't shit where you eat.

Cheeky chappy, hmm.

Doesn't sound overly like the type who's going to become the rare long-term younger man, older woman partnership .. so it'll probably be more like a fling/relatively short-term and you'll have fled up your work environment, it'll be awkward as fk etc.

*fcked up

If you dydvt work with him, I'd say why not. But working in the same team as him ....

The age difference is irrelevant here. You work with him is what matters. Terrible, terrible idea to date him.

How old are you both?
I have a lot of people in office who are together and to be honest it’s gossip for a couple of days and that’s it. A lot have gone on to marry!
Do what makes you happy, forget what others think.

I was very hesitant about dating someone from work, I've since married him.

I'd be more hesitant with the age gap than working together, there's a 6 year age gap with my DH and I and it was definitely felt when kids came up.

How old are both of you. An 18 year old with a 31 year old is very different to a 40 year old with a 53 year old

Age wise, it depends on the ages of you both.

Aside from that, I wouldn’t date someone I worked with

He is 30 and I am 43.
We both have children.
Yes, that's my concern re working together.
I have mentioned our working relationship.

How closely do you work together?

Yeah the age difference doesn't matter but the fact that you work with him does, it could go wrong. However many couples meet at work. Go with your gut. If the age difference is the only thing holding you back then don't let it.

Within the same team. I'm not always in the office but we are together most days.

I don't think the age difference is a big deal - my friend is very happily married to a man with a similar age gap, and has been for the past decade.
However, working together is likely to be more of a potential problem.

Cheeky Chappy.... oh please

Given he's 30 I'm sure he's mature enough to not be playing games. He already has a child so there's no worrying about later down the road what if he wants to be a father.

Go for it. Life really is too short. What's the worst that cld happen. He turns out to be a shit and u split up. U can't stand seeing him and have look for a new job.

My colleagues kept their relationship with each other private for years. Work was work and their private lives were just that, private. Only really became generally known when they retired

Older, younger, the same age....irrelevant. I would never recommend a relationship with someone you work with closely. Maybe the same organisation if it is large, but the same team - no way. It is a disaster waiting to happen.

a bit of a cheeky chappy

Translation: immature twat.

The cheeky chappy personality becomes less endearing over time.

I quite like a cheeky chappy! He's always keeping everyone's spirits high anyway. He is liked within our team.
Yes, it's difficult. I'm really not sure what I'm going to do. I guess the age concern isn't too bad. I will have to have a good think. Thanks everyone.

I work with my DP and I actually think it brings us closer together as we fell in love whilst working together. We work on the same project but fortunately not in the same room (unless we're both working from home) I think if I was sat next to him all day every day, it would be a little much.

I know the first thought is always "if it doesn't work out it will be messy" which is why people say don't shit where you eat, but I don't go into relationships thinking about the end. I say go for it!

Sounds like you're gonna do what you're gonna do, OP. Good luck with that

I think it depends on a few things. Are you ok with it not working out and having to see him every day? You will then know about future girlfriends etc. How much will this impact the team? Do you think you can both hold it together if it becomes acrimonious? How much do you love the job? Do you want to stay forever? Does he?
Not expecting answers, just some things to think about based on my previous experience in this area! Sometimes it can be very painful but sometimes can lead to an engagement

DH and I met at work and I know many people who met their partners at work. I think it’s perfectly possible. You just have to behave like adults which is what you are. Tbh if you both like each other and you’re both available, I’d say go for it. People at work will lose interest quickly enough. Maybe you’re inundated with offers from suitable partners but for me - I hadn’t met so many possible partners who were available, who liked me and whom I liked back that I was going to walk away from a promising relationship just because we worked together and DH felt the same.

Often the issue with age gaps is different life stages, but it sounds like that's not the case here so shouldn't be a problem.

DH and I met at work - worked together for two years before we got together and now been together 25 years - we kept it quiet from colleagues, despite socialising a lot with them, for about six months then once we both felt comfortable that this was looking like a long-term thing, we just gradually let the penny drop by mentioning things we had both done at the weekends. But in the office we treated each other as we always had done - so no flirtation, physical contact or saying anything we wouldn't have been happy to say to a colleague we were friendly with. Worked fine for us but can see it could have been awkward if we had split up, but big enough team (50ish people?) that think it would have been OK.

Sounds to me like you should go for it!