Not sure quite how to manage this situation - so advice would be appreciated! Back story is that we moved to a semi detached bungalow 2 years ago with a view to converting the loft space. Most of the bungalows along our road have been converted, our semi-detached neighbours have also extended to the back. We need a party wall agreement, and the neighbours instructed a surveyor. They also asked us to change our plans - which we did, even though they had already been passed. It’s caused us a lot of delay, we are still living out of packing boxes, and 2 year old still has to sleep in our room. We could move but I’d say it’s highly likely that a new owner here would renovate as bungalow is tatty, roof underlay has perished etc.
Elderly neighbours husband passed away before xmas. We’ve tried to be very supportive as she has no family. DP recently fixed her gate - but I’d say her behaviour was ‘odd’ - she kept saying she couldn’t open the gate, even though - when DP went round - she clearly could. But he continued to do little repairs etc to help.
She phones me regularly to complain about her tradesman etc e.g the postman is taking her post, the window cleaner has scratched her car, the gardener has covered her conservatory in dust etc.
She’s also phoned me on 2 occasions (1 was a Sunday morning early when it was snowing) to say there is a surveyor in the loft, and apologised for the noise. I don’t actually think anyone was there - no car outside, but the same happened this week. No car outside, she also said people have been in her house and been taking things - but it’s ok because her niece’s husband is a police officer (I’m 100 percent sure she has no family).
Yesterday she phoned again - and I really had to calm her down - and she said she was very upset because she thinks she has upset me. Followed by a 2 minute rant about a gardener.
I am ‘slightly’ backing away from communicating with her, but I do want to support her.
We’ve decided to leave our building work until potentially 2022 - as we feel very sorry for her, and don’t want to cause her additional trauma. We’ve put things on hold for about a year now. A surveyor has not been instructed yet - we’ve communicated with the surveyor they chose over a year ago, but as we pay all costs - no surveyor would survey her house until they’ve been officially instructed. I did email the surveyor about 6 months ago to say we are putting the project on hold due to Covid and to be considerate to our neighbour. But that’s all!