Photo removed pronto!

[Dorchester]

I was at SIL’s home. She only ever has photos on display that are of her family in all the years I’ve known her. I’ve always had a gut feeling about trust concerning my DH. Too much of a back story to go into and I might be recognised. A photo of a young girl around 6/7 yrs old appeared in pride of place one day. I was staring at it because I could see a strong family resemblance to my DH and my SD. SIL looked agitated when she saw me looking at it but became even more nervous when I said, “Oh, who is that?” BIL immediately looked uneasy as well. SIL said, “Well, mmmm, eh, that’s a daughter of a friend of mine”
“Who?”
“No-one you need to become concerned with!”
The next time we went to visit it was nowhere to be seen.
Am I reading something into this that doesn’t exist? What are your views Mumsnetters?

Could you ask BIL?

Maybe say you hope you didn't upset SIL, did something awful happen? Worth an ask.

What would change if you knew?
You say you can't leave because you have no money, no family and nowhere to go.

Would any one of those things change if he said yes that's my child?

You already know he's a cheat and a liar (I'm assuming that from you saying he's got form)

So the question is what would change? And if something would change ie you'd leave - what's stopping you now?

Think through your options because you do have them.

If SIL has been married for 50 years she may well have given a child up for adoption in the late 60s and this could be her grandchild.

Maybe she has reconnected with her child and is ashamed (very common among women who gave up their babies) and does not want to tell everyone.

Adoption was incredibly common then presuming you are in the UK.

I vote grandchild of SIL (or BIL if he's your DP's brother).

@CommanderBurnham

Could you ask BIL?

Maybe say you hope you didn't upset SIL, did something awful happen? Worth an ask.

It was over a year ago, she can't randomly bring the subject up now, they'll think she's bankers

I’m still with him because I have no money and no relatives and nowhere to go. This is where your energies need to be focussed.

Is he or is he not a father to another child, is a distraction.

He is 23 years older than you? Omg. Who knows what went on his life before he met you. He should value you but he doesnt. I agree with the poster who says get a job. Get a job and move out. Leave them to their vague mysteries

Maybe it's your husband's granddaughter and for some strange reason it's being kept secret from you.

I think you need to make plans to leave, living with such doubt and mistrust must be exhausting. You must want more for yourself. It won't be easy but surely better in the long run?

Is the SIL his sister?

I'm guessing its a ptosis? It could be any relation tbh. I agree with others I think you need to get a job and build a nest egg to leave. Its not the right environment to bring a child up if you're deeply unhappy.

Have you googled the condition to see how rare etc? Would seem probable she is related.

Did you get the impression the photo was taken recently or decades ago?

The whole thing seems strange and there could be multiple explanations.

When you say sil is she dh’s sister or dh’s brothers wife?