H on IE at our son's birthday treat

[Bluecoatwoman]

Just that. I found out recently that H is on IE.
Our young son had picked a video for us all to watch together as his birthday treat. H spent the whole video on his phone. He's been doing this a lot when we watch videos so I created a basic account on IE so I can check whether he is on IE at those times, and he is.

I don't really give that much of a shit if he finds some poor woman to have unsatisfying sex (from her point of view) with him, but looking for women to shag during his son's birthday do is just grotesque. These video nights are meant to be done together as a family thing. But when our son asks his Dad some question about the film or makes some comment, his Dad is just like, 'whhhaaat?' because he has no idea what is going on. And now I know its because he is prioritising finding a woman to have sex with over sharing something with his son that his son enjoys.
Low, low, low.

Just needed to get that off my chest.

OP - plainly you cannot control your husband's behaviour, which is why posters are putting the spotlight on your response. Not to blame you but because the only thing you have control over is your own behaviour. That being the case, it is bemusing that you are exposing your son to this and having him grow up in such a grim, dysfunctional relaitonship. That is not blaming you, it is putting the onus on you as a parent to do somehting about it.

What are you hoping to get from this post, OP?

Can someone explain what IE is!

@DragonLegs

Can someone explain what IE is!

Illicit Encounters, a website aiming to facilitate just that.

@Bluecoatwoman

Then you should have pulled him out of the room for a minute and said “ your son wants you to be present in this moment, this is his day, shame on you” all in a calm tone then told him to walk back into the room

I did tell him it was video night not messing about on your phone night. But he carried on.

That’s hardly the same as what I said. Many of us are phone addicts, few of us ignore our children to pursue illicit affairs. Have a backbone.

I have no interest in talking about why I am still married or what my future plans are.

Then it was probably a bit silly to post about an issue with the person you're married, who is seeking sex outside of the marriage (something most people would not be ok with) and expect them not to ask why you're with him and if you're planning to stay.

It's a valid question as you saying you don't care he wants to shag other people is a rare point of view, so people were trying to work out your position on staying together in order to offer advice.

You sound like you're really angry. And really defensive. You're taking your frustration out on the wrong people.

This is a bit of a weird thread, isn’t it !?

🚨 🔔

Leave him then he won't be on his phone when you have family time. He'll be elsewhere and won't ruin your dc movie night.

Yes it was a shit thing to do but I don'y know what you wAnt to achieve
He obviously cares more about himself
But of course people are going to tell you to call him up on it or review your relationship
As us agreeing its a shit thing to do won't stop it happening again etc