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Original poster

About to move in together - annoying things

125 replies

Thirtiesclub · 09/02/2021 22:26

Me and dp are about to move in together and already these little things annoy tf out of me.

The snoring
Smelly farting in front of me and finding it funny
Leaving all the bloody lights on downstairs even though hes last up, so i have to go turn them off .
Loud alarm in morning.
Swearing alot

Arghhhhhh

Obviously in comparison to our relationship as a whole and how happy he makes me these are small but they drive me insane.

Any tips from those more experienced?

OP posts:
lottiegarbanzo · 09/02/2021 22:58

So you tell you find it disgusting and he stops doing it in front of you.

That's the main issue here; does he respect you enough to listen and believe you, when you tell him what you feel and what you want?

TheChip · 09/02/2021 23:00

You will go from finding him attractive to repulsive. My ex who enjoyed smelly farting , which also was in supermarkets done loudly on purpose for attention. I ended up absolutely disgusted by him in the end. Not just for his farming either, his whole attitude and behaviour stunk just as much as his farts.

TheChip · 09/02/2021 23:01

Farting not farming

Azerothi · 09/02/2021 23:03

How long have you and your boyfriend been together?

Eckhart · 09/02/2021 23:03

@Thirtiesclub

Lol i know, ive been on my own for a long time so im really noticing every small thing.
Stop minimising your feelings. He's deliberately continuing to do things that he knows are annoying to you. That's not a small thing to consider when you're going to be living together.
GloriaGuadalajara · 09/02/2021 23:04

Ignoring the rest, if he has enough redeeming qualities that you still want to move in with him make sure your new home has TWO BEDS. Proper ones, with mattresses, that you can get a decent night's sleep on. Because there is nothing worse than being driven out of your bedroom by snoring and having to sleep on a not-long-enough/ uncomfortable sofa, tossing and turning in miserable resentment all night.

AnneLovesGilbert · 09/02/2021 23:05

You’ve got a child and you’re planning to move in with this animal?

Eckhart · 09/02/2021 23:06

So maybe its how he was brought up and Doesnt see it as disrespectful

How he was brought up is irrelevant. It's not going to change and it isn't happening now.

If you tell him that something offends you, and he keeps doing it, that's disrespectful.

FinallyHere · 09/02/2021 23:06

Why would you still want to move in together? Take a moment. He is not going to change. This is going to be your life from now onwards.

Is that what you want?

dreamingbohemian · 09/02/2021 23:06

Those are not small things

I'm genuinely not saying this lightly, I think you'd be crazy to move in with someone so disrespectful of you. It's only going to get worse.

DoItAfraid · 09/02/2021 23:10

Yikes! I wouldnt move in honestly.

daisyjgrey · 09/02/2021 23:10

The snoring I would cope with, even if it means ear plugs, it's probably not his fault (unless he's having a skinful every night or smoking 40 a day).

The farting and swearing is basic manners, you need to sit down and have a conversation about 'ground rules' or boundaries the two of you expect, these could be your ones, he might not want you to use the bathroom if he's in there (as an example).

The alarm is part of being a human, unless it's waking you and the whole house up at 4am I don't think you can really complain too much.

The lights is a bloody annoying habit, I use smart plugs to be able to turn everything off, I got sick of everybody leaving lights on all the time. I can do it with my phone while I'm in bed.

Apileofballyhoo · 09/02/2021 23:11

Don't move in with him. You're fundamentally different people, with a different moral outlook. He does not have respect and consideration for others, and you do.

Burnmac · 09/02/2021 23:12

This stuff (and more) is why I'm deeply unhappy and virtually celibate 10 years later. Honestly just don't.

rawalpindithelabrador · 09/02/2021 23:16

Just don't. Seriously. No, there's nothing to redeem it. Stay non-living together partners.

OhioOhioOhio · 09/02/2021 23:21

I'm annoyed just reading about him.

RosesAndHellebores · 09/02/2021 23:21

Snoring is natural.
Farting is natural (time and place)
The lights would drive me bananas
The swearing would drive me bananas

RootyT00t · 09/02/2021 23:22

This is light hearted.
Can we not have this as another thread which details into you all telling OP you know better and she just leave him immediately alongside a load of made up things that haven't happened.

Ellie56 · 09/02/2021 23:23

Don't move in with him.

You are already being driven insane. It will be much worse if you live with him.

Obimumkinobi · 09/02/2021 23:24

You need to make peace with these things ASAP, as he's not going to get any better. Why should he? You're aleady running round after him.
Buckle up, OP! This is your life now. Hopefully he has a LARGE redeeming feature?!

Aquamarine1029 · 09/02/2021 23:27

Things are already bad and you don't even live together yet. You think this disaster will magically get better?

FlamingGreatGalaahs · 09/02/2021 23:38

I have DH sleeping in the spare room when he snores.
I would literally have murdered him by now if he didn't do that!

He does put the house to bed.
He doesn't fart in my presence.
He swears too much.
But there's no alarm.

HollowTalk · 09/02/2021 23:38

Oh god, I wouldn't even dream of living with such a disgusting man. Why would you do that?

FlamingGreatGalaahs · 09/02/2021 23:39

Lol @ the LARGE redeeming feature! 🤣

EternalOptimist7 · 09/02/2021 23:39

stonehopper the OP didn’t say her DP was sweaty

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