New partner and genital warts

[overthinker30]

I caught genital warts a few years ago and keep getting flare ups every now and then. It's not usually a problem as I get them frozen off; however I'm having a flare up at the moment but the GU clinic won't offer the freeze treatment because of covid. They've given me a cream to use instead, which I've been applying for a month and it is doing absolutely nothing! The clinic say it can take up to 4 months! I've recently started dating someone new and it's getting to the point where we are ready to have sex but I have to keep putting him off. I don't know what to do - there's only so many times I can be on my period! Should I tell him and hope he doesn't think any less of me? Has anyone else used the cream before (Aldara) and if so how long did it take to work for you?

@Bluntness100

Sorry my mistake. The lifetime risk of developing it is around 80%.

www.royalmarsden.nhs.uk/gp-update/hpv-and-cervical-cancer-update

The lifetime risk of developing a high risk HPV infection is a surprising 80%. Most will never know they have been infected because there are no symptoms. It is very difficult to avoid an infection with HPV because it can also transmit via skin to skin contact.

[quote EarthSight]@mouldygrapes They can. The NHS in Wales is more rigourous and proactive about testing for HPV in Wales in general so this could explain differences in care.[/quote]
I’m a sexual health doctor. There is no validated, commercially available test to see which strain of HPV is causing genital warts available in any area of the UK.
You mentioned in your next post that the strain the OP has might be more likely to cause flares. It isn’t just about which strain it is, but also each individual’s immune system handles these viruses differently, just as with all viruses.
This explains why some people are exposed to the virus but never develop symptoms, or why some get very mild symptoms compared to others that are more severe or take longer to clear.
It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with your immune system if you do get flares, nor can you boost in in any reliable and meaningful way

Also, how expensive is the vaccine? Speak to a doctor on a telephone appointment for advice - if it helps in preventing flare-ups then it would be totally worth it, wouldn't it?

PM’d you @overthinker30

The vaccine is £400-450 privately, and as I said upthread, there isn’t enough evidence that it helps to clear existing infection. It will still work to protect you against any strains you’ve not had already, but we don’t know yet that it will help clear the strain you have. Studies are ongoing.

Thanks for all your comments and advice everyone. I wasn't aware that the virus could be passed on if you didn't have warts present so I will definitely have the awkward conversation with him

Ask yourself honestly, what would you want if roles were reversed?

Would you want to take the risk of an sti? Would you be fucked off with a partner if they hid an sti?

Then do the right thing. Even if it's hard. Even if that means you don't get what you want.

That's sad but don't crybaby about it, life is shit and unfair sometimes, but it's not OK to make it shit and unfair for someone else.

Cross-posted

[quote EarthSight]@Bluntness100

Sorry my mistake. The lifetime risk of developing it is around 80%.

www.royalmarsden.nhs.uk/gp-update/hpv-and-cervical-cancer-update

The lifetime risk of developing a high risk HPV infection is a surprising 80%. Most will never know they have been infected because there are no symptoms. It is very difficult to avoid an infection with HPV because it can also transmit via skin to skin contact.[/quote]
Yes but you’re talking about hpv overall. Which includes cold sores etc. Genital warts is a very small part of the population less than five percent, most people will not get them. In fact over 95 percent. The op needs to inform any future partners she has them.

I’m sorry but your post is misleading into thinking so many peoooe get them it’s not worth mentioning and this is very wrong. If you have a sexually transmitted disease you need to inform partners.

I work in a sexual health clinic and we wouldn’t advise that people have to necessarily inform all partners that they’ve ever had genital warts, it’s so common to carry the virus but most people don’t get lesions. We try to normalise it and destigmatise, but if you are in a long term relationship and have warts it’s a good idea to talk about it and there is more chance of transmission when you actually have lesions there, especially with any broken skin.

It’s different from the cold sore virus- that is herpes simplex- that’s also very common though and many sexually active people by the age of 40 will carry that too, many won’t have ever had an outbreak.

I think it’s a really tough situation but probably best to inform a current partner. Chances are they’ve already been exposed to it anyway. FPA leaflets online are a good source of information.

Ps stopping smoking is a way to help your immune system to clear the virus- might not be relevant for you though

I work in a sexual health clinic and we wouldn’t advise that people have to necessarily inform all partners that they’ve ever had genital warts

Wow, what now? You don’t advise people to inform their sexual partners they have genital warts? That’s totally against nhs guidelines.

Hi I know this probably sounds an odd thing to do but a few years ago a close friend of mine had warts , cheated on her partner so was scared to go to the doctors . She had string and tied it around then until she cut them all off ! She said it was painful but she's never ever had them back again

Yeh I’m pretty surprised someone who claims to work in a sexual health clinic would advise people to not tell their sexual partners they have a STI

That’s awful that you get flare ups. I have worked with patients who have contracted GW and lots just have it once. Really crap situation for you.

Personally I’m not sure I would admit to having them at present. I would however, inform them that I had contracted HVP. Then, they have the option. I would tell them that it’s a strain that can cause genital warts but unfortunately a high proportion of society have it so pass it on quite easily.

Really hope it gets better for you soon.

Read what they said carefully. The wording used that we wouldn’t necessarily advice ALL patients that they’ve EVER had genital warts, in response to what a previous poster said about needing to inform all partners about your history of them.
Later on the same poster says that it is best to tell the current partner.

Also there are no “NHS guidelines” they mandate informing patients that they’ve been in contact with any type of HPV. It is not the same as the other STIs

Should be “partners” not “patients” in the first sentence of above post

Well if you are planning on having sex with someone with the op is then yes she should be telling people she’s planning to have sex with, her plans are that it clears up so she doesn’t have to tell him

God how grim. I wouldnt touch a man with a barge pole if I knew he had genital warts. I dont care is 99.99% of the population have some form of HPV. I dont and i want it to stay that way.

How do you know you dont have HPV, out of interest? Is it routinely screened for at smear tests?

I want to know if I have it or not. Have definitely heard before that most sexually active adults are likely to have or have had it at some point in their lives and apparently it can take a while to clear. Is there any other possible testing aside from at smears?

@CallistoSol

God how grim. I wouldnt touch a man with a barge pole if I knew he had genital warts. I dont care is 99.99% of the population have some form of HPV. I dont and i want it to stay that way.

Whilst everyone is entitled to know if their partner has an STI before they decide to have sex with them, and if you have an STI you need to disclose it, it’s totally unacceptable to call people “grim” because they have one. Genital warts are no different to verrucas in the sense that both are the result of your skin coming into contact with an HPV virus, whether from the ground which somebody else’s foot has touched or directly from their body. And ultimately, STIs spread in large part because of misinformation, particularly this idea that they’re dirty or “grim” and associated with promiscuity - which often leads people who’ve had very few sexual partners to believe they don’t need to take STI tests because they’re “clean”; and people like the OP to consider keeping it secret because they don’t want to be judged.

I was diagnosed with GW 15 years ago. For about 2 years after I would get flare ups. I think I had them frozen off a few times too. I used to use this cream called Warticon which was good. Eventually they went on their own and I haven’t had a flare up since 2008 x

Grim for hiding the sti

I think it’s obvious the poster meant it was grim to hide it from someone!