Have you ever had a ex come back?

[habbyclabby]

An ex dumped me for someone else 3 years ago.
He messaged me a week ago on messenger.
"I'm sorry for how I treated you,I want to build some bridges with people,I hope your ok,would like the chance to talk to you"
I have zero feelings for him now.
At the time I was heartbroken.
Has anyone else had a EX just pop up like this?

Yes, we are now married. He made mistakes in the past, 11 years later got back in touch and is definitely a changed person. It can happen but I went in with my guard completely up and not expecting it to go anywhere.

Yes my children’s dad has tried to crawl back many times, not interested though

My experience isn't the same but I'll share my thoughts.
I split with my DH, properly - moved out and separated for over a year and went through the whole divorce process (except we didn't apply for the absolute, but everything up to then)
And then we got back together.
I was happy for a couple of years, mostly because he was on his best behaviour and hadn't slipped back into all of the reasons why I left in the first place.
Except, now he has. Every reason why we weren't compatible originally has come back with a vengeance.
There's a reason you split up. Really think about why that was because it probably hasn't changed, even if you think it has.

Oh yes! I have had many reappear usually with the famous and oh so original, "Hey, how are you?" line!

It is up to you if you want to reply to him but you don't owe him anything. Fact he left you broken hearted but has now decided to reappear could mean several things... but don't let him have another chance to hurt you again.

He could be genuine or he could be wanting an ego boost that some like every now and then by thinking they have some hanging on for them. Fact it wasn't the generic lines means he could be genuine but I received similar one time with one apologising for the way he treated me but turns out I was right to be suspicious as I soon discovered he had a current girlfriend who was pregnant to him! So he had clearly never changed and was hoping for certain talk etc while his poor girlfriend was carrying his child!

Keep your guard up whatever you decide to do to be on the safe side

He’s putting his feelers out to see if you’ll shag him. Don’t fall for it!

Just tell him apology accepted ive moved on

Or block him

Or get back involved...but could you trust him 🤔

Yes I did. He never really changed.

Twice. It didn't end well. I actually had reasonably happy memories of the first time but the second experience eradicated those.

No do t do it, he walked out of your life and now thinks he can walk straight back into it again... I wouldn't give him the time of day, delete the text and forget about him.

Yes don't fall for it, in my experience they just want to see if you will sleep with them.

I have an ex who pops up every time he's feeling a bit neglected. He just needs to be reminded that I still don't trust him, that we both know he's still a manipulative, promiscuous git.

I also have an ex from 20 years ago who got in contact in 2019 and we've been chatting every week or two since. If lockdown ever ends, we might meet up. We split before because our lives were going in different directions but there was no animosity. Completely different. Maybe..who knows!

He can't spell "you're" correctly, so it's a no I'm afraid.

I had one who came back after a year. When we split up, I'd been devastated but since then I'd completely moved on. I started off trying to be polite but after a couple of weeks of messages from him, I told him never to contact me again. Luckily he didn't. As a pp said, there is usually a good reason you split up, and they are often after an ego boost

He treated me so horribly as well.
Cut me off like I was nothing then has the audacity to message me.

There you go. There's your answer. It was horrible.

Definitely ignore. Block, even. Please don't reply.

He's in the rear view mirror - foot on the gas and keep going...

Yes, all of them so far..dont they all do this at some point?! My latest ex who is clearly sulking at a decison I've made has just dissapeared after a 4 yr relationship.. Now I'd like him to message me and 'try' but I won't hold my breath.
Thing is what do you want from it if it was going to happen.. Say your peace and have done, listen and have closure..try again? Only you know.
I'd want to know when his last relationship ended.
My ex ex is still trying after 5 yrs.. Men

quite a few of my exes pop back up. of course they are always the ones that i dont care if they pop back up or not lol

you have no feelings for him and he treated you horribly so i wouldn't meet up. but i would accept an apology over the phone or via text and leave it at that.

Yes, there's a reason he's an ex. Nice man essentially but my goodness what a smug bore. I decided to be friends but I'm regretting it now tbh. He's so needy. I treated him badly and now I understand why, although I'm really not excusing my own bad behaviour he just tries too hard. I would leave the past in the past if I were you. I'm in danger of hurting him for the second time when I'm really trying not to.

I’d be blocking him as he treated you like shit to be honest

I’ve had a fair few try and come back and it’s been no not a chance in hell.

What @Plonque said 100%

An ex of mine popped up out of the blue about 2 years ago. We broke up in 2009 for context. He had finally got his life together and wanted to apologise for all the shit he put me through. He messaged a couple of old friends with similar sentiments too. We had a quick catch up, I appreciated the apology for what it was, a decade too late but appreciated all the same and wished him all the best.

Life moved on for both of us and there was no motive other than to make amends. He'd recently lost his mother and I think it made him consider what a shit person he'd been for a long time.

You owe him nothing but his motives may be innocent.

Ignore and block.

You owe him nothing and why should you stroke his ego with even a polite disinterested reply? He'll convince himself you still have feelings for him if you reply at all. And it will make him feel good.

He treated you like shit. He doesn't get to decide - 3 years later - that he thinks he'll get back in touch cos he's at a loose end. Bellend.

Yes the ones that have treated me worst. The on/off kind of relationships.