Being told you have no banter

[HiyaCathyy]

Has anyone ever been told this by a boyfriend? But the banter is negative comments about your appearance and if I react badly I can’t take a joke? Can’t seem to get perspective with all the lockdown stuff going on.

Give him a taste of his own medicine and make a smart ass comment saying something about having more than just banter. Then when he finds it offensive say...ohh I thought you loved banter.

I feel like I can’t think straight sometimes

Red flag. Never be with someone who makes you feel like this.

As tempting as it is to reverse it on him...its a bad idea. He may tell you you take things too far and act really hurt. Mindfuckery basically. Or he may constabtly then use it as a way of reminding you that you put him down too and so you must be ok with it. Dont go there.

Just get away from him. The feeling that you cant think straight is what abusers do. It's like a fog of confusion they bring through their words. The only way out is to get far away from them as possible and block contact (and read up on abusers and how they operate - YouTube videos on narcissists are a good shout).

Banter is a bullshit word used to disguise terrible 'jokes' which are usually just insults.

Agree with all of this, it's just shithouse bullying with a supposedly jokey title.

Banter is for when you can't be real imo.

I am funny! I appreciate humour. I laugh, at others' jokes and at my own jokes :-p but non -stop banter translates as ''let's keep each other at a distance here'' which is ridiculous.

Agree that there's no point challenging him.

Just end it. If he forces you to give an explanation just say you're on different pages.

Good luck xx

Op- I'm a man & wouldn't dream of saying such things to my partner. It shows what a low value man he is.

We have plenty of playful 'banter', which is strictly dialled in on our idiosyncrasies, and never anything which we wouldn't take the piss of ourselves over, and always results in us both in fits of laughter.

It's bullying and you shouldn't accept it.

Have you dumped him yet?

My ex used to do this... he is trying to hurt you and he's getting a kick out of it.
I bet you are a lot better looking than him.