Babyg1995
Well done on the weight loss!
There are some really helpful suggestions here but I don't think my issues are all physical.
I have a stone to lose. I had a stone and a half to go but I've lost half a stone so I'm making good headway there.
My hair is ok. I have it cut and coloured regularly so I always feel that that looks ok. I had it cut from being quite long to a jaw length graduated bob about 18 months ago. The cut/style itself was brilliant and I received loads of compliments on it but it didnt make me feel any more attractive. I'm growing it again now and it's currently shoulder length.
I don't wear a huge amount of make up. I look better when i do but i wear it more for going out rather than every day. It isnt really 'necessary' in my job and I don't like the feel of it.
I dress ok for my figure but i find it tricky sometimes. And I got rid of all my naff underwear a few years ago. I always wear nice stuff. I did it in the hope that it would make me feel better about myself but it didn't.
I wouldn't have fillers or botox because I always feel you can tell when someone has. The last time I went to the hairdressers, the young hairdresser was telling me she'd had lip fillers but they looked really natural. She lowered her mask briefly to show me but they didn't look natural. It was obvious she'd had them done. I do like the idea of light touch botox on my forehead though. I just wouldn't want to look like I'd had anything done!
I have hobbies and interests. In normal times I volunteer. Despite how I might come across here, it's not something I ever complain about in real life.
I eat well. I tend to eat 'clean' and for nutrition so I don't eat sugar or food with additives if I can help it. Just clean healthy stuff. I cook from scratch most nights.
The smile and laugh comments are interesting because I do smile and laugh a lot. But I feel I look my least attractive when i do so. My face is wonky. My mouth isn't attractive when i laugh and my eyes close. I hate photos of myself where I'm smiling or laughing.
As i get older, i am beginning to look more like my dad's mum and i don't like it.
I show an interest in other people to the extent where I've been told that other people feel I'm keeping them out because I always ask about them and rarely share stuff about myself. That was hard to hear. I do have people I share things with but I find it hard. I find it difficult to find the balance.
I remember important things about people and follow up if they've told me they have something going to (good or bad) to ask now it went or how they are.
Where men are concerned, I've completely bought into the idea that looks are the most important thing and I feel inadequate and anxious when I'm with them and there are more obviously attractive women around. I know that I become withdrawn, if it's someone I've been dating because i feel embarrassed for them that they are with me.
I take any explicit compliment or appreciation of someone else as an implicit criticism of myself and I've tried to stop that but I can't. It affects me on a really visceral level. If they are complimented on an area where i know I'm lacking, it makes me feel awful about myself.
I used to go to the gym for strength training. I hate cardio! So I used to spend all my time on the weights. I could see the improvement and i did feel more confident but obviously gyms are closed at the moment. I've ordered some body resistance bands and my daughter and I are planning on doing a half hour exercise routine each morning when they arrive.
This is a long standing issue for me. I remember reading The Rainbow when I was doing my GCSEs and first heard the phrase "you can't make a silk purse out of a sows ear" and I really internalised it. It became the devil on my shoulder and I feel that whatever I do for self improvement, I'm always going to be the sows ear.