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Original poster

No message on Christmas Eve

96 replies

lollipoprainbow · 24/12/2020 19:42

Aibu to expect a Christmas Eve message from someone I have been on lots of dates with since February? I saw him yesterday as he had to pop over to fix up a computer I was buying from him but I've heard nothing from him all day today. We live in different towns. I always want Christmas to be all romantic and lovely like Love Actually but the reality is very different!

OP posts:
Killerphoto · 24/12/2020 22:55

OP I think you need to talk to him about how you feel. He may not realise you want more and be happy to get more serious. Or he may tell you he's not interested. At least you'll know though.

AnneLovesGilbert · 24/12/2020 23:20

@ktp100

Men are generally shit at this kind of thing. Plus you're not in a relationship so these things can't really be expected.

You're setting yourself up for disappointment with this kind of thinking, OP. Sorry if that's sounds harsh.x.

Men are not generally anything, anymore than women are.
Tistheseason17 · 24/12/2020 23:23

Poor fella isn't psychic.
He may ge interested, he may not be.
You won't know unless you ask. Worst he can say is, No. Then you can start 2021 fresh! 11 months is too long to pine and do nothing. Total waste of time.

VivaMiltonKeynes · 24/12/2020 23:26

When are you next seeing him or do you not plan ahead ?

Butterymuffin · 24/12/2020 23:27

Don't text tonight. If you then don't get an answer it'll make it feel worse still. Leave it till the morning and then send a breezy merry Christmas message.

BrowncoatWaffles · 24/12/2020 23:29

How old are you all? This all sounds so tough. You definitely deserve better than someone mooning after an ex.

Original poster
lollipoprainbow · 24/12/2020 23:34

@BrowncoatWaffles I'm 46 and he is 55

OP posts:
Original poster
lollipoprainbow · 24/12/2020 23:35

@VivaMiltonKeynes not sure I will see him again to be honest, we never plan ahead anyway it's all very casual.

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 24/12/2020 23:35

[quote lollipoprainbow]@BrowncoatWaffles I'm 46 and he is 55 [/quote]
Oh love.

queenofknives · 24/12/2020 23:37

Oh no, sounds rubbish OP. I wouldn't message him, just leave it and see if he gets in touch with you. You deserve someone who is into you as much as you're into them, and sounds like this guy is not it. I would just back off gently and start dating other people again. What's for you won't go by you, as they say.

Chocolate123 · 24/12/2020 23:43

I really thought you were going to say you were in your early 20's. Life is too short to be waiting around for a guy to text you. He's stringing you along and when things work out with the ex or someone else comes along you won't be hearing from him. Get yourself back out there and try move on and enjoy a proper relationship which is what you deserve instead of hanging around waiting on him.

HappyDays10101 · 25/12/2020 02:17

How come you haven’t slept with him?

Original poster
lollipoprainbow · 25/12/2020 10:32

No message today either that's that then.

OP posts:
Flibbitygibbit · 25/12/2020 10:54

Oh op. Forget him now. Plenty more fish in the sea. This time you'll be thinking of this Christmas and thinking what a twat he was 💐

chubbyhotchoc · 25/12/2020 12:02

For goodness sake I'd expect this sort of post from a twenty something. You're old enough to know that these sort of situationships are useless. What is the point of handing around with a bloke who's only vaguely interested? Pretty soon vaguely interested turns into not interested at all so you mooning about after him is only going to cause you pain. Your New Years resolution needs to be love only those who love you.

bangheadhere40 · 25/12/2020 12:53

That's rubbish and rude of him.

Merry Christmas

Original poster
lollipoprainbow · 25/12/2020 13:23

All a bit shit really at the very least he could have wished me a merry Christmas and then fucked off !! Looks like I have been ghosted.

OP posts:
Caramelblonde · 25/12/2020 14:03

It's rubbish this happened but you deserve better. Take the day to look after you and don't feel bad. Some people are just users. Move on tomorrow, better things to come.

VivaMiltonKeynes · 25/12/2020 14:33

@lollipoprainbow

All a bit shit really at the very least he could have wished me a merry Christmas and then fucked off !! Looks like I have been ghosted.
Oh he will turn up again when he needs an ego boost !
Orf1abc · 25/12/2020 14:41

You seem rather prone to overreaction OP. Haven't you posted about him 'ghosting' you before? You're not in a relationship, there's no need for him to contact you everyday.

Original poster
lollipoprainbow · 25/12/2020 15:52

@Orf1abc I don't think it's high maintenance to expect a happy Christmas message !!

OP posts:
Charlie63849 · 25/12/2020 16:07

I don’t think you have been ghosted... but if he was looking forward to seeing his ex last night then he wasn’t focused on you, then he went out and probably seen her so again wouldn’t be thinking of you.

He could of hooked up with her which means again, not thinking of you (no idea if she likes him back) but even if he didn’t, he probably got drunk so would be hungover today and seeing family ...

You will probably get a message tomorrow or the next day.

Some bloke I’m chatting too didn’t message all last night or this morning til 3pm. I answered his question last night which was general chit chat About 5pm, then I messaged this morning saying merry Xmas and then I sent him a message asking if he was dead or something As he’s normally flat our messaging 😂 (honestly don’t give a shit what he thinks of me hence the last message) he’s now replied something about ‘sorry he’s been playing and eating’ and Am I ok and merry Xmas.

Iv ignored it 😅 when he messages again, when he’s bored and on his own tomorrow I will just copy and paste his ‘playing and eating’ message and send it back. Petty level 100😂

When he messages you, don’t reply. Pretty until he messaged again.

Charlie63849 · 25/12/2020 16:08

I also don’t think you should see him again - no good will come of it. Find another man to chat too.

Kitten11x · 25/12/2020 20:05

I think it’s rubbish he has not texted you . Maybe it’s a way of keeping things extra causal or he is not thinking of you . Either way move on.

Allispretty · 25/12/2020 23:03

@chubbyhotchoc

For goodness sake I'd expect this sort of post from a twenty something. You're old enough to know that these sort of situationships are useless. What is the point of handing around with a bloke who's only vaguely interested? Pretty soon vaguely interested turns into not interested at all so you mooning about after him is only going to cause you pain. Your New Years resolution needs to be love only those who love you.
I do have to agree with this op...I know this sounds really mean but these are the lessons we learn in our late teens/early 20s nothing good will come of this move on and next time you date look out for the red flags in the early stages so you don't waste your time
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