My boyfriend punched me in the face and fractured my nose.

[KCMummy]

I’ve written this post as an outlet, I’ve also written it for support and the hope that my story and experiences will help anyone going through the same thing to get help and be free.
I’ve written this lost in diary form, starting from today.
I will add how our relationship started, the things we went through and all the rest of it gradually.

The incident took place yesterday, it is still very raw. But if it’s raw it might help just one person become free, so here goes.

Diary of a beaten mummy;

Day 1; it all feels very surreal. I can only see out if one eye. My other eye is completely black and purple, it has a lump the size of a plum on it that has filled with fluid.
My nose is still very swollen and disfigured, it too is covered in bruises and is pretty purple, it had been broken with a head butt from my boyfriend.
My beautiful daughter (age 6) has been very well behaved, she’s been pretty much by my side all day. Not wanting for much, telling me I am still pretty “even doh your eyes is like that”.
I keep having thoughts about him, how we met, how close we were, how I can’t believe now I will have to create a life without him. It’s all so fresh, I’m even worried about him being in custody, will he be ok ?
I know I shouldn’t, but I’m human.
But I will not give in to these feelings, I will not speak to him ever again.

Oh op l am so sorry you must be in so much pain and your DD must have been so scared too....are you somewhere safe for now?

That is awful for you. My friend saw his dad break his mums nose when he was 6. It has affected him and his relationships all his life and he is now 40. I am not saying that to make you feel bad, just to say please make sure she gets to talk to someone about this, even if she seems OK.

You are so strong OP, well done for getting yourself and your daughter away from him

Did/do you live together? Is he the father of your Dd?

If the answer is no to both of those it will be a lot easier to never have to have anything to do with him again.

Your daughter will need someone to talk to, right now she is being quiet and protective because she is in trauma and scared, SS will likely offer assistance so do take them up on it.

If he is released where will he go, does he have the means to access your house?

Have you had an alert out on your house?

Can you get a panic button/ police advice about keeping safe

Have you told the school , this happened to my friend and school were super supportive and arrange counselling for child

Tell the gp get as much support as possible

So sorry to read this. You're getting good advice on here. Hoping you have support in RL. Don't waste any concern on him - he's beyond contempt. A bullying, cowardly thug. Your daughter sounds like a little sweetheart - you both deserve so much better

KC, I'm so sorry that you have been subjected to this horrifying assault.
Please try not to focus on any sympathy you may feel towards the perpetrator, these feelings may come from a kind of trauma bond.
You MUST separate yourself from this man, the perpetrator of a violent assault against someone who trusted him.
Even if you dont feel as if you can please believe us that you must and you can

Take clear photos of your face every day throughout the healing process (with the date on if you can), and keep them backed up in a safe place. They will be invaluable to you later on.

Did DD see or hear the assault?

Just to bear in mind, I still recall my dad assaulting my mum when I was three years old. He strangled her and threw her across the room. You may both need some therapy once everything is more settled. I have c-PTSD due to witnessing multiple assaults on my mum by my dad and that's one thing I wished the adults had done for me.

I hope you're not in too much pain. X

Is he your dds daughter ?

Father

@KCMummy
So so sorry you are going through this.
Sincerely hope you can cut free of this arsehole!!
I tried to defend a friend- at age 18- and her arsehole of a boyfriend stubbed his cigarette out on my face- I cocked him with a bare foot, and he punched me so hard in the head I was knocked backwards.
He broke his hand doing it.. but what really hurt, friend went with him to hospital.
He said to doctor and triage staff he’d hit a MAN.

luckily friend and her baby cut loose a year later.
She said she attended hosp with him to get out of a severe beating later.

He only hit women.
Complete coward.
You and your lovely daughter deserve so much better.💕💯👍

Hugs gets as much help as you delete and block on everything.

@Yohoheaveho

KC, I'm so sorry that you have been subjected to this horrifying assault. Please try not to focus on any sympathy you may feel towards the perpetrator, these feelings may come from a kind of trauma bond. You MUST separate yourself from this man, the perpetrator of a violent assault against someone who trusted him. Even if you dont feel as if you can please believe us that you must and you can

@KCMummy The post above is so accurate. I was astounded at 18 why my friend didn’t cut loose at once.. She said “ But I love him”

But no man who beats, hits, shoves a woman loves her.

Why wait til you get a worse beating?
Break free.

You CAN !
Have faith in yourself and think of your dear baby girl👍🐅 Strength of a Tiger to you 💯

You have been abused. Contact the appropriate services.
Writing a diary and calling it a name is the last thing you should be wasting your time on.

GET SUPPORT NOW.

Are you safe where you are. Lets pray the police remand and charge him.

We're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.

We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Domestic Violence page.

Very best wishes from all at MNHQ

Sorry but why on earth are you concerned about helping even one person become free or that a 6 year old is telling you , you are pretty.

I suspect you are in shock? What support do you have available?

I assume the police are involved...did they leave details of support agencies. Do you have friends?

I will not speak to him ever again

If there's one thing you should do it's this. Don't let this evil monster break your spirit.

@KCMummy

Thank you all for your beautiful words and advice.

My ex is in custody, they are going to try and charge him with ABH. They may release him, but they will try to demand him.

I went to the hospital last night, I’ve been told to ice me eyes and nose and not sleep laying flat.

Thank you all again, you don’t know how much your words mean to me.

Much love x

Remember that whatever he's said, whatever you've been told or led to believe, NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT.

You are so brave and strong op- I’m so proud of you for not putting up with this bastard! You and your little one deserve so much better.

I’m trying to respond to the most frequent asked questions, forgive me if I don’t answer all...

He is thankfully NOT the father to my child, however we did lose two babies together earlier this year.

I definitely agree that we should both have therapy, I spoke to SS and emailed the school about “play therapy” as a start.

@randomer I’m hoping your comment didn’t come from a negative place...I’m not concerned about if my daughter thinks I’m pretty, I’m simply stating that’s what she is saying through her innocence.
Secondly if my trauma and story can stop one single person going through what I have been through then I didn’t write this post for nothing. That is all.

Also I am surrounded by support form friends and family, it’s just I feel they have been through enough in the last 24 hrs, I just wanted to vent to someone else.

Again, much love for your beautiful words.
They are so kind ❤️

You poor thing. How awful xx

Ask the police to take out a non molestation order on your behalf -if they won't -apply yourself for an emergency hearing to get a restraining order.