possible break up

[Sy100]

my and my other half may break up due to the other half having feelings for somone else nothing sexual happening but there was holding each other long talks wanting more but said it could never work between them and that my partner loves me and wants to be with me but also sent messages last week that make this seem untrue to this other person im unsure of what to do and what would happen if we break up i dont currently work due to covid but am trying other half is self employed i would get help if i stayed in our flat not as much if i moved in with parent guess im just looking for views of what to do :(

Did your other half day it wouldn't work between them to her, or to you? Bit unclear your post without punctuation. It looks like he's informed you of some of the story, but his texts tell a different one. Your relationship is on thin ice, don't plan a future with him. If you get on with your parents, and they have the room, I'd move out asap.

other half said it wouldnt work between them talking about other person they spoke about it apparently

Do you have children?

I would be gone. An emotional affair is as bad as a physical one for me.

messages to the person from my partner saying things like id do anything for you i want to hold you one last time but has told me he loves me wnats to be with me and has said there guilt it shouldnt of happened but had a emototional connection that went to far but wants to make it work with me hes been struggling with depression and we grew appart a bit its all very confusing sorry im bad at writing

yes e have 1 child

If you decide to break up don't leave your home, he's looking elsewhere let him live elsewhere, you stay put and get financial help.
He is the one who is thinking of causing the separation don't let him have it easy and stay where he is, if he wants someone new he can find a new home too. X

Would you have found out about this walk and hug during lockdown if he hadn't told you? There's obviously more to it than he's letting on. He's told you because he doesn't want to be seen as the bad guy and end it with you, or he's too much of a wuss to end it, so he's told you in the hope you will end it for him. Either that or he enjoys trying to make people jealous and twists the knife. He is already the bad guy in this, so it's ok to walk away with your head high and tell people he met someone else, so you ditched him.

i have checked and would get enough help to stay in our flat so could do he says he doesnt want to leave told me everything feels guilty loves me wants to be with me make things work i dunno :(

@Opentooffers i knew something wasnt right he was doing work for them and they spent alot of time together ovbiously and were holding eachother having long talks had an emotional connection the other person and him said it couldnt go further and stoped seeing each other

Don't give him the option to stay. He might want to work it out, but you don't have to want that. Will you be able to get past this? Will you be able to trust him.

Could you trust him again?

Does he work with her?

Has he blocked her now? Sacked her?

Just read your other posts, bit of drip feeding. Do you rent or own your flat or rent as a joint tenancy? How long have you been together, and how old is DC? These are all important things to consider.

@Opentooffers we both rent somewhere together weve been together almost 9 years and dc is 4

@chickenyhead hes self employed and can never see each other again easily i dont know about the trust think hes told me everything so i dunno hes been struggling maybe it was just something that happened i dont belive he went looking for it maybe im just being stupid haha but nothing like this ever happend before

If he agrees to go no contact with OW, you could try working at your relationship, if that is what you want. You haven't said how you feel about him. If you want to work on it together, there are things that need addressing - his depression, and the distance between you. Couples counseling and GP for him.

@Opentooffers yeh i know i do love him but i dont know if ive been happy for a long time but this is due to alot of things not just our relationship i was trying to work on it to make things better and try to make this work i think i still want to but i just dont think you can go from wanting another person but also wanting me in a week messageing another person last week then also saying you want me and to make it work and you love me it just doesnt seem right in my head but i belive him im probable just being dumb

being a single mum scares the crap out of me