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Original poster

OMG ~ I need help, fallen in love with a teenager?

56 replies

mrsrobinson · 19/10/2004 17:12

i am completely confused and upset. I have changed name btw for this post.

I am 31 years old, and started a job in a supermarket 3 months ago, I started really having a laugh with this one lad, he really made me smile and we really connected, i would look forward to going in to work as I knew he was there, he even changed a shift so he could do the same as me.

I knew he was younger than me, but I figured 23/24, and as I am single I thought a few years couldn't hurt, we met for a drink and had a really good time for the first 3 hours, until it came into the conversation that he was in fact 18 years old, I was so shocked as he looked and certainly acted older.

This happened Saturday night and I made my excuses and left, I am so confused as I think that I have fallen in love with him and cant get him out of my mind, but the other part is thinking there is something wrong with me.

Need help / advice / support.

OP posts:
Fizog · 19/10/2004 17:14

he's legal. No moral problems from here!!

If you like him have a bit of fun but beware, he's young and you obviously have at least 1 child.

snmum · 19/10/2004 17:15

well he is 18, bit young for me, but legal as fizog says!

emmatmg · 19/10/2004 17:18

Agree, you're not breaking any laws so go for it.

Also don't they say at a woman reaches her sexual peak at around 30 and a man at around 18. Sounds perfect..........whatever a sexual peak may be

Original poster
mrsrobinson · 19/10/2004 17:18

omg again, I have just realised that my title could refer to anyone from 13-19

I do have one dd 12 yrs old (and the thought that he is nearer her age than mine has crossed my mind about 100 times)

OP posts:
Original poster
mrsrobinson · 19/10/2004 17:19

emmatmg

OP posts:
anorak · 19/10/2004 17:19

You are perfectly entitled to pursue it if you want to, but don't if you feel uncomfortable with it.

Gingerbear · 19/10/2004 17:21

I went out with a toyboy once.

Great fun

Lonelymum · 19/10/2004 17:21

Does he know your age? Does he know about your daughter? I would have thought that if he did and it didn't bother him, then you have nothing to worry about. Life is short and pleasure can be very far and few between. Take what life has offered you and enjoy it. I am quite envious of you and I am even older than you!!

bonym · 19/10/2004 17:22

I agree wtih Fizog - go for it, but go cautiously as the age difference could mean that you ultimately want different things out of a relationship. If you approach it as a bit of fun and it turns into more than that's a bonus, but try not to fall too hard too fast (easier said than done I know) to avoid any possible heartache. Good luck . x

Lonelymum · 19/10/2004 17:22

Few and far between I think I mean

emmatmg · 19/10/2004 17:22

Just lie to anyone who comments and say he's 24.

Go on enjoy him

Gingerbear · 19/10/2004 17:23

It started to go wrong when I was talking about films/music from the 1980s and he said, I have never heard of that/them....I was still at primary school

emmatmg · 19/10/2004 17:23

opps, forgot to change it didn't you!

acer · 19/10/2004 17:24

Go for it!

Beetroot · 19/10/2004 17:27

This reply has been deleted

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lou33 · 19/10/2004 17:32

Go out with him and enjoy it . You don't have to turn it into anything heavy.

bundle · 19/10/2004 17:34

i remember when i had dalliances after i'd broken up with the man who's now my dh, i (for the first time in my life) had flings for the sake of it for the first time in my life, separating sex from love, iykwim. good luck!

lou33 · 19/10/2004 17:36

I have to say if I wasn't married I would be flinging at much younger men

iota · 19/10/2004 17:38

ohhh younger men - easier to train you can't teach and old dog new tricks. Enjoy

JuniperDewdrop · 19/10/2004 17:39

lol lou I've done that before but remembered just in time. I don't bother changing at all now though that was in the early days.

I'm a bit worried for you gingerbear as you say you've fallen in love with him. How long have you known him? Not that it makes much difference I suppose as I fell in love with dh quickly. Try to take it slowly as his family may not be so happy. Not that it's anyone's business but he's still developing emotionally.

fwiw my mum is 25 years older than her partner and they've been together 15 years and tbh she's 'younger' than him iykwim?

jampot · 19/10/2004 17:44

I don;t think it is Gingerbear as she posted she also had a toyboy previously ??

Original poster
mrsrobinson · 19/10/2004 17:45

Thanks all who have replied.

He does know my age and has met my dd when she has come into the supermarket.

I have known him for just under 4 months and we work together 8 hrs a day 4 days a week.
I really do think that I love him, I think about him all the time, someone mentioned that he was gorgeous, but infact he is not, far from it really, but to me he is lovely as he makes me laugh and smile.

I have returned his text and told him I thought he was older and he text back if it helps he is 19 in 2 weeks.

I said we needed to talk.

Don't know what I would expect from him and he has always made comments that would imply things rather longer term, ie reference to his mates wedding next August and how he'd love me to go with him etc etc.

I will play it by ear, its just my family are very judgmental and I have listened to them way too often in the past.

OP posts:
iota · 19/10/2004 17:48

mrs R - I have a good friend who has been married to a man 14 yrs her junior for the last 8 yrs, and they're very happy

jampot · 19/10/2004 17:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lulupop · 19/10/2004 20:36

I have a friend who is married to a man 14 yrs her junior and they have 2 Ds's as well as her DS1 from another man. It can work.

I assume you are not married/attached in any other way?