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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

OH hasn't text me at all on holiday.

70 replies

Yellowxo · 20/09/2020 19:12

OH told me last week he wanted to go on holiday with his friend( who is mid 20s and childless) he gave me 4 days notice he said he needed a change of scenery and a break. When I asked him to book it a different time he started being really arsey.
I'm a student nurse and I have lectures we have a 7 year old DD who I had to find before and after school care for.
He's now away and been away for 2 days without as much as a text. I'm livid at his selfishness and wondering whether I want to be with a man child.

OP posts:
Pjsallday · 20/09/2020 19:18

4 days notice? Betcha anything hes planned it for months but didn't want to tell you. Hes sounds like a selfish knob!!

LindtNosher · 20/09/2020 19:28

Are you sure he's actually away with this friend?

RHOBHfan · 20/09/2020 19:28

Sorry... you have a child together and he went on holiday with 4 days notice?

And he hasn’t been in touch at all, not once, for 2 days?

Would you do that to him OP?
If not, why not?

hobbyhobby · 20/09/2020 19:29

This is not ok. Who’s he away with? Sounds very suspicious.

namechange20202020 · 20/09/2020 19:29

Is he really where he says he is?

widespreadpanic · 20/09/2020 19:29

I agree with Pjsallday, he waited that late to tell you so that there was no way for you to go. Sounds like he’s losing interest or needs some space from you.

Rigamorph · 20/09/2020 19:30

Are you not worried that something might have happened?

AllsortsofAwkward · 20/09/2020 19:31

Something doesn't sound right and I think you know it, trust youre spidery senses

newnameforthis123 · 20/09/2020 19:34

Four days notice and you have a child together?! Why on earth would you want to be with someone so selfish?!

LouisBalfour · 20/09/2020 19:38

Frankly, more fool you. This is not how fathers behave.

conduitoffortune · 20/09/2020 19:41

More fool you is a bit harsh isn't it

Heatherjayne1972 · 20/09/2020 19:47

Ring him?
And when He finally gets back it sounds like you need to talk - if you want to stay together that is

It doesn’t sound great tbh

Original poster
Yellowxo · 20/09/2020 19:48

I asked what hotel and he said I don't know his friend booked it. Me and his friend don't get along but that's another story. He guilt tripped me when I said he couldn't go because it being short notice and DD
Yeah I'm sick of him too throughout lockdown and his lazy arse but I can't run off because I have DD to take care of!

OP posts:
Original poster
Yellowxo · 20/09/2020 19:50

Well he used to work away Monday to Friday and never rang me first or text.

OP posts:
wingingit987 · 20/09/2020 19:51

Get rid.

Sounds like a pathetic loser.

spacepoppers · 20/09/2020 19:52

This would be a nope from me. You're studying, and have childcare and he ups and leave with zero contact? Not even a quick hi for his SEVEN year old?! Fine, if you want to live like you're 20 mate, off you fuck.

Pineapplesandflamingoes · 20/09/2020 19:56

What a selfish lump.

How about you offer him an extended break and have all of his stuff bagged up by the front door ready for his welcome home and change the locks. Just a thought.

Clymene · 20/09/2020 20:00

He's your daughter's father but it doesn't sound like he's in a relationship with you tbh

carly2803 · 20/09/2020 20:32

id have a bagged packed for him - send him to stay with said "friend" until he grows up and is more considerate?

im not sure i would buy hes with a "friend"!

Flittingaboutagain · 20/09/2020 20:42

It doesn't matter who he is with. If he cared about you, either of you, at all, he'd have been in touch.

I would be hoping he has temporary amnesia in hospital. Otherwise I really do think you need a better long term plan. This isn't a normal loving romantic relationship. It isn't even co-parenting.

Dollyrocket · 20/09/2020 20:43

Pack his stuff and take it to a friend/relatives and change the locks.

EnjoyingTheSilence · 20/09/2020 20:44

Another one voting to get rid. What a waste of space

FippertyGibbett · 20/09/2020 20:48

What a selfish man.
Sounds like he wants to live the single life.
And has he really gone with a male friend ?

TheGirlWithAPrince · 20/09/2020 21:01

Not much of a partner is he :S

hobbyhobby · 20/09/2020 22:05

He doesn’t know what hotel? Yeah right. Load of rubbish. He’s shagging around.