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Does anyone else do this?

57 replies

Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:26

Hand over baby to hubby literally the minute he walks through the door from a 14 hour day? Recently went to a mums coffee morning and one of the mums is expecting her second dc and she said as with the first the minute hubby gets home she's going to hand over baby to him.. Just curious to know if any other mums did this..

OP posts:
flametrees · 30/08/2020 13:34

I did when my first had colic and I nearly went insane listening to her crying.

Aerial2020 · 30/08/2020 13:35

I think this is pretty normal

TimeTruthandHearts · 30/08/2020 13:38

Occasionally I'd let him take his coat off first, but not often.

Aerial2020 · 30/08/2020 13:39

I don't know why a 14 hr day detail is relevant?
At home with a baby 14 hrs is pretty stressful.

Acdcccc · 30/08/2020 13:42

It may be normal but don't think it's fair, i know I've been home with cranky baby all day but after a long work day i know dad / mom needs time to decompress before taking on a small one.

I'm not talking hours here but at least a chance for a quick shower and a brew.

Aerial2020 · 30/08/2020 13:44

Most fathers gladly take the baby naturally?

TimeTruthandHearts · 30/08/2020 13:44

My husband never minded, he looked forward to it.

Mumoftwo1994 · 30/08/2020 13:46

@Bekind2020

Hand over baby to hubby literally the minute he walks through the door from a 14 hour day? Recently went to a mums coffee morning and one of the mums is expecting her second dc and she said as with the first the minute hubby gets home she's going to hand over baby to him.. Just curious to know if any other mums did this..
It depends on how the day has been to be honest but there are times when you just need 5 minutes.
Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:46

Aerial yes I do understand that and agree to some extent but also I agree with Acdcccc.
My exP used to work 6 days a week 14/15 hour day manual job, came home as filthy as anything.. I gave him time to shower and just chill for half an hour before he took over.. Although I was doing a hard job myself, I still at the time felt for him that he was working that hard and long to provide for us.

OP posts:
greyisagoodcolour · 30/08/2020 13:47

Yeah, I did this. My first screamed and screamed day and night. I got about three hours sleep in a 24 hour period, in broken chunks. Why, are you judging?

greyisagoodcolour · 30/08/2020 13:49

I still at the time felt for him that he was working that hard and long to provide for us

Ah, I see - you think the menz come first, and you want to encourage a slagging fest against any woman who disagrees, or acts differently.

Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:49

No not at all judging at all. I guess as one user mentioned it depends on what kind of day both mum and dad has.

OP posts:
Aerial2020 · 30/08/2020 13:49

Of course.
That's ok. It's also ok for a father to want to hold the baby naturally as soon as they get in.
Talking in mums groups, you will always hear how different families do things.

JamieLeeCurtains · 30/08/2020 13:50

I've done '14 hour days' which involved 2 x 2 hours commuting (healthy walk, train journeys reading the Guardian / reading through lecture notes / eating half of packed lunch and drinking coffee), plus a one hour lunch break, and a fair amount of time chatting to colleagues & students and reading essays at a desk with my feet up. Meetings and lectures where I felt valued.

14 hours alone with a crying baby is hell. Especially when the escapee, usually one's DP, arrived back and asks what's for dinner.

Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:50

Grey.. Seriously back off. That's not what I'm doing. It was a question that was asked. I not engage in any kind of argument with you.

OP posts:
Aerial2020 · 30/08/2020 13:51

Also staying home with a baby is working hard for your family. They are the same, both parents working to raise the family..
Just saying as there is usually a big debate on mumsnet how a stay at home parent has it easier or something.

TimeTruthandHearts · 30/08/2020 13:52

I guess as one user mentioned it depends on what kind of day both mum and dad has

Not really, my husband always wanted to hold them as soon as he got home. And I sometimes had lovely days on maternity leave, but was still ready to have some time to myself by the time he got home.

Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:53

I know. I think it's definitely a case of it depends on what day you've both had.. There were days where I did just want to hand her over straight away and up upstairs and cry or pass out

OP posts:
ElanaD · 30/08/2020 13:53

My hubby would go upstairs wash hands, change clothes and then come and take the baby off my hands after that. Normal.

Keeping2ChevronsApart · 30/08/2020 13:53

Do babies cry for 14 hours solid ? I'd be straight down to a&e if any of mine had been like that?

Allthepinkunicorns · 30/08/2020 13:53

I let dh have something to eat first and then I gave him ds while I went for a nap. I did all nights with ds during the week. It was a bit of bonding time for them both.

Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:53

But also days where I was so happy just holding her in my arms and looking at her!

OP posts:
greyisagoodcolour · 30/08/2020 13:54

If you don't want people to comment then don't post. What I am hearing is you criticising women who do things differently from you. I suspected it in your first post and if was confirmed in your ' let the poor dears' have a shower and cuppa first, that's what I do poor darling who works sooo hard for us'
There's literally no other reason I can think for you to post on such a non-issue.

Bekind2020 · 30/08/2020 13:56

Grey.. If its such a non issue why are you putting more than your two pence in
You're a non entity and I won't regard anything you say any further. You don't even know me to say that. It was a question.

OP posts:
greyisagoodcolour · 30/08/2020 13:56

Or perhaps you really just are so ignorant that you think all mothers have babies who cheerfully gurgle as their mothers hold them all day?

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